First Book She Should Get Is “How To Tell The Time”

, , , , | Right | November 3, 2019

(I work at a dental clinic inside a school. I stroll in at 8:30 and there’s a lady sitting in our lobby. She’s looking at the bookstore/cafe. She starts circling the chairs, sighing heavily. Finally, she marches up to me.)

Customer: *snarling* “The website says the bookstore is open at 8:30!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but it’s actually 9:00 am; the times are listed on the door.”

Customer: “But I came here at 8:30! The website said 8:30! Why isn’t it open at 8:30?!”

(I am thinking, “Why are you yelling at the dental clinic about the bookstore?”)

Me: “I have no control over that; you can talk to the people at the bookstore when it opens.”

Customer: “They saw me! They should open the doors! I just want to look at the books!”

(I had no answer for her. Finally, she huffed off. She then started pacing back and forth in front of the door, waiting for them to open. Now and then she’d circle the chairs, sigh, and glare at me. I went into the file room when it became too much. It’s just a college bookstore, lady. No need to get so intense! I just checked the website: it says they open at 9:00 am.)

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Working At This Dentist’s Is Like Pulling Teeth

, , , , , , | Working | November 1, 2019

(My first job is as a dental nurse working with the city’s university dental hygienist course. I love the job, and I get on well with the students and the tutors. However, I quickly start to find that I don’t get on so well with the other nurses. The majority of nurses have worked with each other for a long time, know each other outside of work, and have the same interests. At first, this doesn’t matter, but slowly, things start to get unfair. I often find myself on the crappy end of jobs, and one of them causes me do serious damage to my right wrist; I tear the tendons and am signed off work for a long time. This is where things get super bad, as my manager never reports the accident, which is something she gets in a lot of trouble for. When I eventually return, I am on very light duties, spending more time as a glorified receptionist than a nurse. The other nurses double-down on their disdain for me. I suddenly find myself even more left out than before, and any slight mistake is blown out of proportion. One of the nurses actually yells at me in front of trainees because I haven’t signed a cleaning sheet. When I complain to the head nurse, she says that I was in the wrong so tough, despite the fact I admitted to the mistake, but I am angry about the way it was handled. I cannot describe the misery I feel for the next six months, but luckily, I am able to find another job in a field that is as far removed from dentistry as possible. On the Monday morning after I get the contract for the new job, I approach the head nurse on clinic first thing before clinic starts.)

Me: “Morning, [Head Nurse], can I have a quick word with you?”

Head Nurse: “No, I’m going up for breakfast break now. It can wait.”

Me: “It can’t really; I won’t get time to talk to you about this before clinic starts, otherwise.”

Head Nurse: “Sorry, not happening.”

Me: *shouting across the clinic as she walks off* “Okay, I’ll leave my resignation letter here, then!”

(She d*** near sprinted back to me, asking if I was joking. I smiled, told her no, and handed her the letter before turning and going back to my duties. I was, at that time, the one who made all of the department appointments, organised clinics, and knew the brand-new booking system better than anyone else. That next month as I served my notice, watching the panic slowly dawn on them was the best!)

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That Part Of The Body NEVER Made Men Wise

, , , | Related | October 18, 2019

(My son has just gotten his wisdom teeth pulled, and he’s still loopy from the drugs. He starts crying.)

Son: “Dad, they cut my penis off.”

Me: “No, they didn’t, son.”

Son: “Are you sure? 

Me: “I promise, it’s still there. I wouldn’t let them cut your penis off.” 

My Brother: “They tried, but he put up a fight.”

Me: *nudges him* “It’s still there.”

Son: *reaches down his pants* “THANK GOD! I STILL HAVE IT! DAD’S A HERO!”

(He doesn’t remember any of this, but my brother loves teasing him about it.)

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With So Many Fillings He Has Become Very Dense

, , , , , | Healthy | October 15, 2019

Patient: “Why do I need an x-ray?”

Me: “To check for problems [Doctor] might have missed.”

Patient: “Problems like what?”

Me: “Cavities between your teeth and under your fillings, and gum disease.”

Patient: “If [Doctor]’s eyesight is so bad that he can’t even see cavities anymore, why is he still a dentist?”

Me: “There is nothing wrong with [Doctor]’s eyesight, Sir. It would be impossible for anyone to look underneath fillings and in between your teeth.”

Patient: “So, I just let him poke around my mouth for nothing? Why didn’t you tell me that right away? I would have skipped the exam and just done the x-ray. Now I need to pay for something that is completely useless. You are ripping me off. I’ll get a second opinion.”

Me: “You are welcome to do that. But they’d want to do an exam, as well.”

Patient: “I’ll tell them that you already did.”

Me: “They’ll still want to actually look at your teeth. Believe me.”

Patient: “So, you are trying to tell me that they’ll rip me off, too?”

Me: “Sir, an x-ray is more expensive than an exam.”

Patient: “Oh, if you do the x-ray, can I take that to my second opinion dentist?”

Me: “Yes.”

Patient: “Sox I’m right. The exam is useless.”

Me: “Do you want an x-ray or not now?”

Patient: “Do I get a refund if you don’t find anything?”

Me: “No, you can’t get a refund.”

Patient: “You people are so greedy.” 

Me: *speechless*

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Society Is Transitioning With Them

, , , , | Working | October 12, 2019

(I study dentistry in France. I’m a VERY anti-social justice woman, but I still think it’s important to support real issues, like gay and trans rights. Therefore, I educate myself on those topics, perhaps a bit more than the average person. This takes place at the dental clinic. We get the names and file number of patients on paper and then have to get them from the waiting room by calling their name out loud. I open my patient’s file using their number and read through it quickly, not paying much attention to their name. I see them being referenced as a woman, with pronouns like she and her. I then go and get them by calling “Mrs. [Last Name], and an older woman stands up and accompanies me to my chair. I then notice that the first name on the file is male. It sometimes happens that we get patients with the same last name confused, so I check:)

Me: “Um, sorry, but… what’s your first name? There might be a problem with the file.”

Patient: “Oh, it’s [Male Name], but I use the name [Female Name] now. I haven’t legally changed sex because that would make me lose my pension, but I am male to female transgender.”

Me: “Oh, all right. I guess you want me to refer to you by using female pronouns?”

Patient: “Well, you can call me [Female Name]!”

Me: “Haha, I can’t really do that since I don’t know you that well, but sure, I’ll call you ma’am, then.”

(The appointment goes well, and we chat about how and why she came to find out she’s a woman. At the clinic, our chairs are basically in half-open cubicles, so people walking by can see and hear everyone’s patients. After I’m done treating her, a guy from my class approaches me. It’s worth noting his father is an imam — a Muslim prayer leader — and he was raised VERY conservatively.)

Guy: “So… What was up with your patient?”

Me: “What do you mean?”

Guy: “Well… I don’t get it. Was it a man? A woman? Was it a woman who wanted to be a man? Was he wearing a wig?”

Me: *pause* “Bruh.”

Guy: “What? That’s weird.”

Me: “Well, she’s male to female. When she was young, she was a man, physically at least. Now, she’s taking hormones; that’s why she has a female body. She identifies as a woman, so that’s what she is. She just wasn’t born in the right body, so to speak. And yes, that’s her real hair… You know that if you let yours grow, it will get long, as well, right?”

(I know I simplified it a bit, but my colleague was mystified by the concept of transgender people, so I didn’t want to overcomplicate it for him. To his honor, he didn’t feel “disgusted” or anything of that sort, just confused. I didn’t think there still was anyone under forty in France who didn’t know what a transgender person was!)

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