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Sadly, There Are People THAT Racist

, , , , , | Right | July 14, 2021

Customer: “And I also want a pound of white American cheese.”

Me: “I’m afraid we’re sold out of that kind.”

Customer: “What? You mean you don’t have any more?!”

Me: “Yeah. It’s on sale, so everyone’s been buying it. But we still have the yellow American.”

Customer: “No! I want white American! I want white cheese! NOT N***** CHEESE!”

Me: “Uh… you know what, I just…”

I walked outside and stared plaintively into the horizon for several minutes.

Feel Sorry For The Chicken Blobs She Had Growing Up

, , , , , | Right | July 13, 2021

I work in a deli that also serves hot, ready-to-eat food like chicken wings, rib tips, potato wedges, and whole rotisserie chicken. A woman comes up to our hot case and waves me over.

Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

Customer: “I was just wondering, are there bones in these rib tips?”

Me: “Yes, there are.”

Customer: “Oh, well, what about the chicken wings?”

Me: “Those have bones, too.”

Customer: *Looks disgusted* “I don’t want any food with bones in it. I’ll just get a rotisserie chicken.”

Me: *Confused at the stupidity* “You want a whole rotisserie chicken?”

Customer: “Yes! How hard is that to understand? I just want a chicken because all your other food has bones!”

Me: “All right.” *Packages and gives her a chicken* “Enjoy!”

I can’t help but wish I could’ve seen her face when she got home and found there were bones in her whole rotisserie chicken.

Has No Beef With Chemicals

, , , | Right | June 9, 2021

Customer: “Why is this beef so much more expensive than the regular kind?”

Me: “That’s organic, ma’am.”

Customer: “Screw that! Give me the cheaper kind that has all the chemicals in it!

There… Are… Four… Tenders

, , , , | Right | June 5, 2021

Customer: “Can I get some chicken tenders?”

Me: “How many would you like?”

Customer: “How many do you have?”

Me: “Uh… four.”

Customer: “Can I have five?”

The Portion Is Growing, Not Shrimping

, , | Right | June 3, 2021

A customer walks to the counter. Before I can even acknowledge her, she starts looking around and frantically waving to get someone’s attention. I stop what I’m doing and walk over.

Me: “May I help you?”

She looks at the shrimp silently for a while without looking up at me.

Customer: “Is this shrimp fresh?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. Would you like some?”

The customer is still having a conversation with her friend across the aisle.

Customer: “Yeah. John was thinking about going…”

She looks up and sees I’m waiting to hear her order.

Customer: *To herself* “Let’s see… five people… three shrimp per person… hmmm…” *To me* “Give me twenty shrimp.”

She walks away. I bag up and price her shrimp. A little while later, she walks back to the counter to grab her shrimp.

Customer: “How many shrimp did you put in here?”

Me: “You asked for twenty.”

Customer: *To herself* “Five people… four per person…” *To me* “Put five more shrimp in here.”

She walks away again. I open her bag, throw in five shrimp, and reprice it. She returns again.

Customer: “Better put five more shrimp in!”

She walks away. I put five more shrimp in. This time, I wait until she comes back just in case she wants more. She looks at me waiting to reweigh her shrimp.

Customer: “What are you waiting for?!”