Got To See It To Believe It

, , , , , | Right | December 21, 2017

(I work in a deli that also serves hot food. I have a lady come up talking on her phone and just points.)

Customer: “I’ll have that.”

Me: “Ma’am, I can’t see what you’re pointing at.”

Customer: “THAT! THAT RIGHT THERE!”

Me: “Ma’am, I don’t know what you’re pointing at.”

Customer: “Are you treating me like this because I’m [race]?”

Me: “No, I’m treating you like this because you’re too ignorant to see the metal plate blocking my sight. Now, what can I get you?”

Customer: *into her phone* “I know, right? How rude.” *walks away*

The Customer Is Always Right, But The Price Isn’t

, , , , , , | Working | December 14, 2017

(My partner and I order a large platter of chicken from the deli at our local grocery store and go to pick it up.)

Partner: “Hello, is the pick-up order for [Partner] at [time], ready?”

Cashier: “Yeah, hold on.”

(The cashier goes and gets our order and sets it at the counter. It has a large container of ranch sitting on top that we did not order.)

Me: “We didn’t order ranch; are you sure you grabbed the right one?”

Cashier: *deep sigh* “Yes! Your total is [price almost half of what it should be].”

Partner: “That can’t be right; are you sure this is our order?”

Cashier: *snippy* “Yeah! It’s [wrong price]!”

Me: “There is no way that’s right; the base price before taxes is $9 more than that. Are you sure you don’t want to check and make sure you grabbed the right one?”

(At this point the cashier looks pretty angry and seems like she is about to say something, when an older deli worker steps up to see why this is taking so long.)

Older Worker: “What are you—” *looks at register, then leans in and squints as they look back and forth between the price and the platter* “What is wrong with you?! That platter is [correct price]! You know that! Fix It!”

(They walk off to continue working and our cashier gets a weirdly smug look while FINALLY looking into the system for our order information. She clicks around, puts in the right total, and straightens out the order.)

Cashier: “That’s what happens when you can’t keep your mouth shut! You could have gotten it for a cheaper price, but—”

Partner: “You realize that you would have got in trouble if we had done that, right?”

Cashier: “What?”

Me: “We’ve both worked retail. Order systems like this have a base amount you should have at the end of the day if all the orders were picked up. They would look to see where that other $13 went and see that it was a transaction you did, and then they could write you up or fire you.”

(At this the cashier goes pale and turns super friendly.)

Cashier: “Well, mistakes happen, and you two are just really good people! Just really, really great people.”

(We slide our card and collect out order.)

Me: “Not everyone you meet in retail is a bowl of sunshine. You have a great day!”

Cashier: “Yeah.”

Thought It Was Going To Be A Hot Potato Subject

, , , , | Right | December 8, 2017

(A customer came in earlier and purchased some of our homemade potato salad. He now calls.)

Me: “[Deli], how may I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, who am I speaking to?”

Me: “This is [My Name].”

Customer: “I was in there earlier, and I bought some of your potato salad.”

Me: *thinking: We JUST made that this morning; how is there a problem with it?* “Yes?”

Customer: “It is the best potato salad I have ever had! Whoever makes it there, make sure that they never change the recipe; it’s delicious!”

Me: *startled* “I… Thank you. [Coworker] makes the potato salad, so if you want I can transfer you to—”

Customer: “No, that’s okay. I just wanted to let you know that it’s really good! Have a nice day, now.”

Me: “You, too. Thank you for calling!”

(The customers that call to compliment and not complain are few and far between, but they really brighten my day!)

That Sure Is Some Premium Racism

, , , | Right | December 7, 2017

(I’m standing at the counter when two female customers, the first one African-American and the second one white, get in line for service.)

Customer #1: “Hi, can I get a pound of [Premium Brand] ham?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. We don’t carry [Premium Brand] products. We have [Competing Brand] instead.”

Customer #1: “Oh, that’s no good. I only eat [Premium Brand]. I guess I’ll go somewhere else.”

Me: “I’m sorry for the inconvenience.”

(She walks away, and the second customer approaches.)

Customer #2: “I’d like a half-pound of [Premium Brand] roast beef, please.”

Me: “I’m sorry, as I was just telling that other lady, we don’t carry any [Premium Brand] products.”

Customer #2: “You REALLY don’t have any? You weren’t just saying that?”

Me: “Just saying that? No, ma’am, I wasn’t just saying that.”

Customer #2: “Oh. I just assumed you did have it, but you didn’t sell the good stuff to [racial slurs].”

Me: “…You have a good day, ma’am.”

Having A Crush Can Be Cheesy

, , , , | Working | December 5, 2017

(I work in the deli of a big box store. Even though I have only been there two months, my manager keeps having me train people. This irritates me because it’s well beyond my pay grade. I tend to become snarky to certain questions because of this, especially when new hires say they have been in deli environments.)

New Hire: “Can you show me how to use the shrink wrapper again? Mine looks messy.”

(I don’t understand how wrapping opened cheese can be messed up, because it’s just plastic wrap on a slightly heated pad to make it stick better.)

Me: “Show me how you’re doing it.”

(She wraps the cheese and it looks fine.)

Me: “It’s fine. The only other thing some people do is take an extra ten seconds to set the edges on the heat pad so it sticks better if they have time.”

Trainee: “But it’s not pretty.”

Me: “These are opened cheeses we are slicing, not displaying. Do you have a crush on the provolone and feel the need to impress it?”

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