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Has No Backbone For Eating Real Food

, , , | Right | August 4, 2021

Customer: “Why do you take the marrow out of your pork chops?! I can’t believe you do that!”

Me: “Marrow? We don’t take the marrow out. That’s almost impossible to do.”

Customer: “Yes, you do. When I get pork chops from [Competitor], they have the marrow in them. I buy them here, no marrow.”

Me: “I promise you; we don’t remove any marrow.”

Customer: *Pointing to the chop* “Right here. No marrow!”

Me: “Um… we remove that, but that’s not bone marrow.”

Customer: “Then what is it?”

Me: “Um… the spinal cord.”

Customer: “…Am I gonna get sick?”

Sadly, There Are People THAT Racist

, , , , , | Right | July 14, 2021

Customer: “And I also want a pound of white American cheese.”

Me: “I’m afraid we’re sold out of that kind.”

Customer: “What? You mean you don’t have any more?!”

Me: “Yeah. It’s on sale, so everyone’s been buying it. But we still have the yellow American.”

Customer: “No! I want white American! I want white cheese! NOT N***** CHEESE!”

Me: “Uh… you know what, I just…”

I walked outside and stared plaintively into the horizon for several minutes.

Feel Sorry For The Chicken Blobs She Had Growing Up

, , , , , | Right | July 13, 2021

I work in a deli that also serves hot, ready-to-eat food like chicken wings, rib tips, potato wedges, and whole rotisserie chicken. A woman comes up to our hot case and waves me over.

Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

Customer: “I was just wondering, are there bones in these rib tips?”

Me: “Yes, there are.”

Customer: “Oh, well, what about the chicken wings?”

Me: “Those have bones, too.”

Customer: *Looks disgusted* “I don’t want any food with bones in it. I’ll just get a rotisserie chicken.”

Me: *Confused at the stupidity* “You want a whole rotisserie chicken?”

Customer: “Yes! How hard is that to understand? I just want a chicken because all your other food has bones!”

Me: “All right.” *Packages and gives her a chicken* “Enjoy!”

I can’t help but wish I could’ve seen her face when she got home and found there were bones in her whole rotisserie chicken.

Has No Beef With Chemicals

, , , | Right | June 9, 2021

Customer: “Why is this beef so much more expensive than the regular kind?”

Me: “That’s organic, ma’am.”

Customer: “Screw that! Give me the cheaper kind that has all the chemicals in it!

There… Are… Four… Tenders

, , , , | Right | June 5, 2021

Customer: “Can I get some chicken tenders?”

Me: “How many would you like?”

Customer: “How many do you have?”

Me: “Uh… four.”

Customer: “Can I have five?”