He’ll Grow Into It

| NC, USA | Friendly | August 21, 2015

(I’m talking to one of my favorite kids. He was adopted and so was I, so we’ve always gotten along really well. He’s known to say hilarious things.)

Boy: “How old are you?”

Me: “I’ll be 18 next week.”

Boy: “How old are you REALLY?”

Me: “17. But I’ll be an adult next time you see me.”

Boy: *eyes bug out* “18 is a grown up?”

Me: “Yep!”

Boy: “You’re killing me!”

Me: “Why is that?”

Boy: “Because you’ll be OLD!”

Unfair Daycare

, | Richmond, VA, USA | Right | August 12, 2015

(I work at a gym daycare. We have a very strict policy that we cannot watch a child for more than three hours per day. Also, parents MUST be in the building while we are watching their children. A man (who was wearing no workout clothing) walks in with his two daughters.)

Customer: “Hi, this is my first time dropping my kids off here. Do I need to sign anything?”

Me: “Yes, sir, just sign here!”

(I hand him a “first time” liability waiver and he glances over it.)

Customer: “Three hours? That’s it?”

Me: “Uh, yes, sir… we aren’t allowed to watch children for more than three hours per day.”

Customer: “Well, all right, I guess.” *signs waiver*

Me: “Okay, you’re all set; have a good workout, sir!”

(He walks out. Our gym is quite large so I assumed he brought workout clothes and planned on changing. Three hours go by and he’s yet to pick up his daughters. After multiple announcements over the PA system I decide to investigate. Turns out he’s nowhere to be found in the entire gym. The gym manager pulls up his contact information and calls him.)

Customer: “Hello?”

Manager: “Hi, is this Mr. [Customer]?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Manager: “This is [Gym] and we have your daughters… It’s been well over three hours and you aren’t allowed to leave the building if your children are in daycare.”

Customer: “But… I’m at work right now. I don’t get off for another five hours. You’re going to have to watch them until I’m off work.”

Manager: “Sir, we are not a daycare. We are a fitness club. We can only watch your children if you’re in the building working out.”

Customer: “Then why do you call it a daycare?! I can’t just leave work right now!”

Manager: “Sir, if you don’t come get your children we will have no choice but to call the police.”

Customer: “What? You can’t do that! I signed a form saying I could keep my children there!”

Manager: “That’s correct; the form you signed specifically mentions that guardians are not allowed to leave the building or keep their children here for more than three hours.”

Customer: “All right, fine!”

(He hung up. Twenty minutes later he came and picked up his daughters. My manager informed him that he was no longer allowed to keep his children in our care, and he subsequently cancelled his gym membership.)

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Take Care At The Daycare

| Kent, England, UK | Right | June 5, 2015

(I’m a secretary/receptionist for a nursery. I’m dealing with a VERY upset parent whose husband has just left her. Another parent approaches my desk to pay, hears what’s going on and backs up to give the first parent some privacy.)

Parent #1: “I don’t know what to do. He just packed his stuff, said he ‘didn’t want to do it anymore,’ and left. I don’t know how I’m going to pay you.”

(The more she spoke, the more she cried. I buzzed for the owner and she took the parent into her office. The second parent then approached the desk again:)

Parent #2: “Oh my goodness, that poor woman. Anyway, I need to pay [Son]’s bill for the month, please.”

(I told her how much and she writes a cheque. She then hesitates a little.)

Parent #2: “Could I pay her bill as well?”

Me: “Pardon? You want to pay another person’s bill?”

Parent #2: “Yes. She needs all the help she can get right now.”

(I tell her it’s almost double her bill but she insists. Just as she’s finished writing the cheque the owner and the first parent come out. The woman has calmed down a bit and rushes to pick her son up.)

Parent #2: “Excuse me, [Owner], could you do something for me? Would you give this to her, please?”

(She’s holding a gift card for a supermarket.)

Parent #2: “I’ve been putting £50 a month on it since January; there’s £500 on it now. They’re going to need it a lot more than we will.”

(I and the owner stared at her for a moment, completely taken aback by her generosity. The owner took the card and the parent went to get her son. That’s when I started crying. I was so overwhelmed by what had just happened. Two days later, when the first parent brought her son in, the owner greeted her and asked her to come to the office where she gave her the card and told her the bill had been paid. I could hear her crying through the door. That was the best day at work and probably the kindest thing I’ve ever seen.)

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School Is Building A Reputation

, | Wichita, KS, USA | Learning | May 23, 2015

(I’m a maintenance worker at a daycare/pre-school that’s attached to a church, and I overhear this one day while I am cleaning windows.)

Teacher: *leading the four-year-old students outside* “Okay, kids, we’re gonna go outside and walk around the building!”

Little Boy: “Miss! No! It’s not a building! It’s actually a school. It just LOOKS like a building!”

Might Want To ‘Sit’ For This One

| NJ, USA | Learning | April 28, 2015

(As the end of the school year is coming up, all the children who are going to kindergarten have to have assessments. Since I am the owner’s daughter, I am responsible for administering them. The tests generally go routine except with one girl.)

Me: “Okay, [Girl], this is our last game, okay? I’m going to say a word, and you’re going to say another word that rhymes with it, okay?”

Girl: “Okay!”

Me: “So, for starters, what rhymes with cat?”

Girl: “Um… bat!”

Me: “Good! Okay, what rhymes with sit?”

Girl: “Tit!”

(Since ‘tit’ is not necessarily an inappropriate word, I’m stumped on what to say.)

Me: “Uh… good, good. That… is a word that rhymes with… sit.”

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