Dripping Wet With Double Meaning

, , , , , | Right | November 8, 2017

(The show “Singing in the Rain,” featuring actual onstage rain, has just finished, and the audience is thanking all the actors for a good show. One elderly lady walks up to me.)

Elderly Lady: “Ugh. This show got me wet. It’s a shame; I get wet every other day of the week, anyway.”

(I was scared to shake her hand after that!)

Unable To C Your Point

, , , , , | Right | October 11, 2017

(I drive the shuttle-bus in between the terminals at the DFW airport.)

Me: *to the passenger standing at the stop* “Good day, sir. I am going to terminal B and D.”

Passenger: “Did you say terminal C?”

Me: “No, sir. I am going to terminal B and D.”

Passenger: “So, you are not going to terminal C.”

Me: “No, but if you wait a few minutes, there will be another shuttle that will bring you there.”

Passenger: “Okay, so, where do you go?”

Me: “B and D, B and D. I am going to B and D.”

Passenger: “And not to C, right?”

Me: *trying to stay calm* “Nope, sorry.”

Passenger: “But you will go to C eventually, or not?”

Me: “You are one stop away from terminal C. If you come with me, it will take almost half an hour before we get there. The bus you need will be here in a couple of minutes.”

Passenger: *thinking* “Oh, okay, thanks. So, you are sure you are not going to C after this stop?”

(I closed the door and rapidly drove away.)

It’s Snow Problem

, , , , , | Right | October 10, 2017

(It has just snowed on the weekend, so our restaurant decides to close on Monday. We open the following day, and I come in for night shift. It is about 11:35 pm and I am getting ready to close at midnight. A customer comes in.)

Me: “Hi, welcome to [Restaurant]. What can I get for you?”

Customer: “Hi. Um… I’ll have the… actually, wait.”

(I give her a confused look.)

Customer: “Was y’all closed yesterday?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. The streets were really icy and a lot of our employees weren’t able to make—”

Customer: *cuts me off* “Are you serious?!” *She starts to yell* “I placed my order several times through the app! I called 62 times and nobody answered! I even have the call list to show you! And then I had to drive up here to find out that y’all was closed!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. We didn’t realize the weather was going to—”

Customer: “NO! YOU’RE NOT SORRY! I NEEDED THE FOOD YESTERDAY! ME AND MY KIDS WERE REALLY HUNGRY AND BECAUSE Y’ALL WASN’T OPEN WE WASN’T ABLE TO EAT ANY FOOD!”

Me: “I’m so sorry about that, ma’am. Next time, I’ll let the sky know to not make it snow so you can eat.”

Customer: “Okay! Thank you!” *walks out happy*

They Think They’ve Tabled This Discussion

, , , , , | Right | September 28, 2017

(It is close to closing hours on Valentine’s Day, in a busy shopping district. A customer and his wife “whistle” at me to get my attention while I’m hurriedly rushing to fulfill other customer requests.)

Me: “Hello, how are you today? Can I help you with anything?”

(The customer flicks her hand in a dismissive motion, seemingly frustrated that I dared to speak to her.)

Customer: “I want this table but without the legs; they are too bulky and ugly.”

Me: “Ma’am, we don’t sell those two parts separately, but I can show you some tables that do not have that design. They may work better for your preferences.”

Customer: “I just want this table with different legs.”

Me: “Uh… We only have furniture that sells together with both pieces in the same box. We don’t have a way to interchange table legs; that would be up to the manufacturer.”

Customer: “Well, tell the guys who make this to send me different legs.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can not do that. Please, follow me and I will show you some different options you may like.”

(We walk over to our store’s computer system, where I pull up our table options. The customer points at a picture of a table.)

Customer: “I like that one there; I want that one.”

Customer’s Husband: “That one looks MUCH better.”

(They are pointing at a picture of the table they were just looking at.)

Me: “Ma’am, that model is the same model we have on the floor.”

Customer: “I don’t like that one; I want this one here.” *referring to the picture of literally the same table*

Me: “Okay, ma’am; we can do that. If you would, please fill out this form, and we can have it delivered from our warehouse in [State] to your home with a delivery and assembly fee, if you would prefer that.”

Customer: “Okay, do that.”

(I thanked the customers for their patience, told them that their table would arrive sometime in the next couple of weeks, and that we would send them a confirmation email. The customers left after filling out the form with their information and having paid almost twice the amount for the same table, due to shipping and building costs.)

The Road To A Write-Up Is Paved With Good Intentions

, , , , , | Right | September 27, 2017

(I work for a company responsible for getting manufactured items to the end users. [Customer #1] sends out a group email with a number of people involved, including others within her company and a number of people at my company.)

Customer #1: “Hello, [Customer #2]! Please give me the status of order number [number]. This is an extremely important order and I need an update as soon as possible.”

(I see the email, and knowing that [Customer #2] won’t be in the office for another hour or so, I go ahead and answer the email, replying to all.)

Me: “Hello, [Customer #1]! We actually finished processing that order last night, and you will have it today by noon. Please let me know if you have any other questions.”

(You might think that would be the end of the story. Oh, no. [Customer #2] called my manager’s manager to ream me out for making her look bad. She insisted that I should be suspended without pay because I had responded to an email that was addressed to her. Never mind the fact that the only way she would have gotten this information would have been to contact me, have me look it up and then respond to [Customer 1]. It didn’t matter that by the time [Customer #1] would have gotten that answer, the shipment would have already delivered. This has been the only time I’ve ever been written up for providing good customer service.)

Page 1/212
Next »