Many years ago, I worked for an organization providing front-line customer service. It was a decent place to work, but our manager had lots of rules. One of the rules was that we could not do any personal printing with the printers at work. If we did, we were expected to pay $0.50 per page for black-and-white printing and $1.00 per page for color. I’m not sure who made this rule, but the manager was constantly reminding us.

Our desks were not assigned, meaning that any day you could be sitting at any desk, depending on your assigned tasks for the day.

One day, I was interviewing for another job within the organization but at another location. Prior to the interview, the manager of the other location asked me if I’d mind printing a copy of my resume and bringing it with me as their printers were down for the day. I said no problem and figured I’d print it at work since it was work-related.

I was sitting at a desk that did not have a printer. The closest printer was located between my manager’s desk and an employee desk, so I printed my resume and stood up to go get it.

Before I got to the printer, my manager got there first. My print job went ahead of hers, and she saw what I had printed.

Manager: “[My Name], this looks like a personal print job.”

I explained that it wasn’t, but she disagreed and said since it had nothing to do with our day-to-day work, I had to pay $2.00 for four black-and-white pages. I begrudgingly paid up. I asked her what happened to the money, and she said she always put it in the Christmas party fund. All right.

A few weeks later, I was sitting at the desk with the printer. It was lunchtime, and everyone except [Manager] agreed to go to a nearby restaurant for lunch. I walked out of our building and realized I had forgotten my wallet, so I quickly ran back in to get it. When I got to my desk, I could hear the printer going. I was curious about what was being printed as it was spitting out page after page. I quickly glanced at the pile and saw at least 100 pages printed in color, announcing a sweet sixteen birthday party for [Manager]’s daughter. It very obviously belonged to [Manager]. She came out of the bathroom a moment later and seemed shocked to see me standing there. I picked up the pile and passed it to her.

Me: “Our Christmas party fund is going to be getting a big boost!”

She said nothing but looked really uncomfortable.

A few weeks later, our district manager made his quarterly visit. He talked about the upcoming Christmas party and how excited he was for it. I decided it was time for some petty revenge. I raised my hand and said:

Me: “I’m just wondering how much we’ve accumulated this year for the Christmas party from print jobs?”

District Manager: *Looking confused* “What do you mean?”

I told him our manager’s rule. He got really quiet and said he’d have to review this.

The next day, [Manager] sent an email saying the printing rule was something she was misinformed about and would be abolished immediately. Being the little s***-disturber I am, I hit “Reply All” and asked what would happen to the already accumulated funds. Someone else said we should have a nice healthy fund for a pizza lunch, and everyone agreed.

The next day, I heard [Manager] ordering ten pizzas for lunch. She used her own personal credit card to pay for it all. Do I think she was pocketing the printing money all along? Absolutely. But it was fun making her sweat and then having to spend nearly $300 the next day to make up for it!

I have been trying to reduce my expenses lately and decided to cancel my subscription to a weekly magazine. They have increased the price twice in the last two years, and now it costs over 50% more. Besides, it is a hefty weekly magazine that covers international political and economic development, and with a small toddler at home and a full-time job, I simply never have time to read it properly.

I log in to my account and realize that cancellation is the only action I can’t do by myself; I am forced to contact their customer support. I opt for the live-chat function.

Agent: “Hello. How can I help you?”

Me: “I would like to cancel my subscription, please. I know I still have a few weeks covered by my quarterly pre-payment, and I am happy to just stop my subscription after that.”

Agent: “I am sorry to hear you want to cancel. May I ask what the reason is?”

Me: “Well, it is both the cost increase and the fact that I never have time to read it with a small child at home.”

Agent: “I see. How about I offer you a great deal? I can offer you a yearly subscription for 30% off, effective next quarter, but you would have to pay the reduced yearly fee in one go.”

Me: “I am looking to cut costs right now, not to pay an additional chunk of money, even if it turns out to be cheaper through the year. Please just cancel.”

Agent: “What if I offer you a yearly subscription for 50% off? Then the prepayment right now would be much smaller.”

Me: “No, thank you. It is not just the money. I hope to be able to return as a customer when my circumstances change for the better again. But I don’t know when that would be.”

Agent: “I understand. How about I do this for you? I will apply a discount to the running quarter that you prepaid and refund you the difference. This way, you can enjoy the rest of the subscription and save money.”

Me: “Really? Wow, that is an amazing offer. Thank you.”

Agent: “Great, that is done. You will receive your refund in the next three to five business days.”

Me: “Just to be sure, my subscription will stop once the prepaid quarter has finished?”

Agent: “Oh, no. You see, I am only allowed to do one action per chat. I have already applied the discount, so you’ll need to contact us again and request the cancellation.”

Me: “Wait, what? you never told me that by accepting the refund I can’t cancel anymore.”

Agent: “Sorry for the misunderstanding. There is nothing I can do now. But enjoy your refund!”

Me: “Please transfer me to your supervisor right away!”

Agent: “Fine. I will cancel the refund and I will cancel the subscription.”

Me: “And I would like the transcript of this chat, please.”

Agent: “You can download it yourself.”

He then abruptly disconnected the chat. I downloaded the transcript and received email confirmations about the refund, the cancellation of the refund, and the subscription cancellation. I also received an email asking me to rate their customer service, and I left a very honest review, attaching the transcript.

I really did intend to return as a customer — even for full price — in a couple of years, but now I am left with a dirty feeling that the agent attempted to trick me into forgetting the next quarterly prepayment, which is pulled from my account automatically. I removed my card details from my account, just in case.

My mother had a long, frustrating experience with a popular nationwide hardware store. She’s looking for a pet-resistant screen to put on our patio. She placed an order a few days ago, but it hasn’t arrived.

Customer service picks up, but the employee is talking to a coworker, complaining about a different customer.

Mom: “Hello?”

The phone hangs up. Mom redials, and the same person picks up.

Customer Service: “Thank you for calling [Store]. How can I help you?”

Mom explains her order.

Customer Service: “Oh, there’s no order here. I guess I could go try and get one off the shelf for you.”

Mom: “I placed an order three days ago. I need this today so I can start my project.”

Customer Service: “Okay, let me see what I can do.”

Mom is put on hold. Several minutes pass.

Customer Service: “I’m still working on it, sweetie.”

Back on hold. Several more minutes pass.

Customer Service: “We don’t have any of those screens in stock. You’ll have to call a different store.”

Mom: *Getting increasingly frustrated* “You’re telling me that, even though I placed an order three days ago, I now have to drive around town going to different [Store] locations to find the product I’ve already paid for?”

Customer Service: “Well, hold on.”

Back on hold. Several minutes pass… and they hang up.

Mom calls back and re-explains everything to the same person.

Customer Service: “Okay! I’ll call you back once I have the information.”

Mom: “Wait, don’t call me on the number on file. That’s my husband and he’s at work. Call me at [phone number].”

Customer Service: “Okay, got it!”

The call ends. Not trusting this customer service rep anymore, Mom chooses to call product service.

Product Service: “Thank you for calling [Store]. How can I help you?”

She explains the order again.

Product Service: “Well, I don’t see an order here… But maybe I can call around to other stores and see if they can get one to you.”

Mom: “You mean I don’t have to drive to one of those stores to get it myself?”

Product Service: “What?! Of course not!”

Mom: “Well, your customer service told me I did.”

Product Service: “Seriously? Okay, let me talk to [Manager] and see what I can do. I’ll call you back once I have the information.”

Mom: “Okay, but don’t call me on the number on file. That’s my husband and he’s at work. Call me at [phone number].”

Product Service: “Got it. Sorry for the inconvenience.”

The call ends. A few minutes later, Mom gets a call from Dad saying that the store called him. Not having time to deal with it, he canceled the order.

Fed up, Mom calls customer service again and gets the same person as before.

Customer Service: “Hello, thank you for calling [Store]. How can I help you?”

Mom: “I’d like to speak with [Manager]. [Product Service] said they were going to talk to him, and I’d like to speak with him directly.”

Customer Service: “Okay, just a moment.”

She’s put on hold again. Several minutes pass…

Customer Service: “Can I help you with something?”

Mom: “…Yes, I’d like to speak with [Manager].”

Customer Service: “Okay, just a second.”

This happens a few more times. Finally, Mom hangs up and calls again.

Mom: “Look, I’ve been hung up on twice, put on hold more times than I can count, and ignored several times. I want you to, right now, walk over and hand this phone to [Manager].”

Customer Service: “I’m sorry. Do you want to speak with the store manager, district manager, or—”

Mom: “I don’t know. All I know is that his name is [Manager].”

Customer Service: “Well, okay… hold on.”

Mom did eventually get in contact with said manager. He canceled her order and refunded her money. This is the first time we’ve dealt with this hardware store in several years and probably the last time for several more!

She’s currently working on the project with a competing hardware store, and they’re being much more cooperative. The manager showed little remorse when Mom informed him everything the customer service worker did to her over the course of these calls.

A customer approaches our customer service desk. I am typing something up on the computer, but I stop and turn to her and am about to speak when she suddenly lets out the most blood-curdling scream I have ever heard. It’s bellowing and loud, and she does it without changing the expression of her eyes, which is weird. She also never breaks eye contact with me.

After a few seconds of that, she clears her throat and then speaks perfectly normally.

Customer: “Now that I have your attention…” 

She had a simple request and then left without issue. I was too shocked (and scared) to question it.

I worked in customer service over the phone for a popular TV company. I went several rounds with one customer who was upset about his bill.

Customer: “I shouldn’t have been charged at all! I haven’t used my TV in nine months because I haven’t had any power!”

Me: “Sir, you should’ve called us to tell us to stop service. Since you didn’t do that, I can only get your service turned off now. I can’t reimburse you for nine months of non-use.”

Customer: “You can see that I haven’t used it! You’ve charged me illegally!”

Actually, we can’t see whether customers are using our service or not. I kept trying to reason with this guy, and he kept arguing. After forty-five minutes, I finally said:

Me: “Sir! We are not the government. We do not track your every move. Would you like to cancel or not?”

He chose to cancel.