I’m using a prepaid phone and bought two cards at the mall so I could top up my account. The first card went through without a problem, and I set it aside in my wallet to scratch off the second one. At the time, I was so sleep-deprived from the holiday rush and bout of depression from two of my indoor/outdoor cats dying during the New Year celebrations that I was on autopilot.

I somehow managed to put the second card aside and slept, woke up four hours later, and tried to top the second card up. I kept getting an error message saying the service was unavailable and that I should check my account. I was sure I only topped one card up. I checked and the expiration date was still good, so I contacted customer service.

It took an hour with me waiting for the agent to reply once every three minutes and then put me on hold for so long that at one point I was on hold for fifteen minutes. I worked at a call center before, and everything about this was just so bad that if I hadn’t been so fatigued I would have been that yelling, cursing customer. In the end, I just resignedly asked if I needed to bring my receipt and the actual card with me to the store. The agent said that would be best and ended the call.

I had a free card that had a value of a fifth of the amount of the problem card, so I started rummaging in the card section of my wallet for it, went to get a coin, and lo and behold… the card I hadn’t used was in my coin purse, folded like a bill.

I had become that customer.

To the poor agent, I am so sorry. There was no chance of you resolving a problem when there was none but my stupidity.

I was working at the service desk. A man in a hoodie with the hood up came up and got behind the guy I was helping. Then, an old black woman came in. She walked right past the man waiting and plopped her things down as soon the man who was being helped was done.

I looked at the man in the hoodie and called him forward.

The lady immediately began to yell and accused me of being racist for helping the “white” man before her.

The man pulled his hood down. He was also black. The lady then went quiet.

My mother-in-law is her own “boss” at one of those triangular-shaped companies. She has tried for years to get my husband and me to enroll. Every time we say no, she comes back with a new reason why we should change our minds.

I go out to get the mail one day and see a package on our porch. It is from [Company] in my name. I think about calling my mother-in-law to find out what is happening, but my husband suggests we call [Company] directly.

Customer Service: “Hi, thanks for calling [Company]. Can I get your name for today’s conversation?”

Me: “Hi, this is [My Name].”

Customer Service: “Hello, [My Name]! I see you are a new member. Welcome! How can I help you?”

Me: “Um, yeah, actually… I never enrolled.”

Customer Service: “Oh, well, that’s odd. Let’s take a look here. Can you provide your address on file?”

Me: “[Address].”

Customer Service: “Okay, it looks like you enrolled on [date] under [Mother-In-Law].”

Me: “Yeah, sorry, we didn’t. I have actually said no several times.”

Customer Service: “Oh. Well… I’m not sure how this happened, then.”

Me: “I’m guessing [Mother-In-Law] enrolled me. I’d like to cancel.”

Customer Service: “Oh, are you sure? We have lots of great offers coming up for the holidays.”

Me: “I’m sure. Thank you.”

Customer Service: “Okay, well, we’re sorry to see you go. Let me get you connected with the cancellation team.”

While I’m on hold, my husband’s phone rings. It’s his mother.

Husband: “Hello?”

Mother-In-Law: “Why did I just get an email saying you’re cancelling your account?”

Husband: “Why did you sign us up without our consent?”

Mother-In-Law: “You need it!”

Me: “No.”

My phone picks up.

Cancellation: “Hi there, you’ve reached the cancellation department. If you’re sure you want to cancel, I can help you with that.”

Mother-In-Law: “No! Do not cancel! It’s a mistake!”

Cancellation: “Uh… I’m sorry, I don’t understand. You do want to cancel, or you don’t?”

Me: “Yes.”

Mother-In-Law: “No!”

Me: *To my husband* “Hang up.”

He hangs up without saying goodbye.

Cancellation: “Are we… okay?”

Me: “Yes, it’s fine. My mother-in-law signed us up without our consent.”

Cancellation: “Oh! So… Let me see how to do this. I’m guessing all the security questions are about her, not you.”

Husband: “I can guess at them.”

Cancellation: “Oh, okay, sure. Let’s try that.”

The entire time we are talking to cancellations, his mother is texting that we cannot cancel, it’s a mistake, etc. My husband gets all the security questions right without hesitation.

Cancellation: “Okay, I can finalize your cancellation here. I’m so sorry this happened.”

Husband: “Thank you for working with us.”

Cancellation: “You’re all set. Have a great day, guys.”

For the next week, we are hounded with calls and messages from [Mother-In-Law], alternating between begging us to change our minds and berating us for stealing food from her mouth and being selfish. Then, one quiet afternoon, [Mother-In-Law] barges into our house.

Mother-In-Law: “I hope you’re happy, [My Name]!”

Me: “I was.”

Mother-In-Law: “[Company] cancelled my business because of you!”

Husband: *Gently* “You need to go.”

Mother-In-Law: “No, no, this is her fault. I am going to sue you for emotional damage and financial impact!”

Me: *Shrugs* “Okay.”

She clearly expected a different reaction.

Mother-In-Law: “And…and you will pay!”

Me: “Since you’ve threatened legal action, any further contact can go through our lawyers.”

Mother-In-Law: “But—”

Husband: “Mom, just go.”

He reached out to usher her out the door, not touching her. She backed out the door, stumbled at the step, but recovered without falling. I closed and locked the door before she could do anything else. She did try to sue us, but when we countered with her identity theft, she backed down. We are currently in no contact and quite happy about it.

I work in customer service for a bus company. We have different service schedules/timetables for weekdays, school holiday weekdays, Saturdays, and Sundays. Public holidays operate on the Sunday timetable.

Me: “[Operator], this is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Caller #1: “Yes, I wanted to know, is tomorrow a normal timetable?”

Me: “No, as tomorrow is Good Friday, it will operate on a Sunday timetable.”

Caller #1: “Oh, so is Saturday a Sunday timetable, as well, then?”

Me: “No, ma’am, Saturday is a normal Saturday timetable, and Friday, Sunday, and Monday are all on the Sunday timetable.”

Caller #1: “Oh, so is today a Sunday timetable?”

Me: “No, ma’am, as today is Thursday, it is a normal weekday timetable.”

Caller #1: “Is today Thursday?”

Me: *Banging my head on the desk* “Yes, ma’am, today is Thursday and therefore a normal weekday timetable.”

Caller #1: “Oh, thank you.”

A bit later:

Me: “[Operator], this is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Caller #2: “I’m looking up the timetables on your website and it says, ‘Bus operates public school days only.’ Does that mean that it operates today?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, as today is the last day of public school, that bus will operate today.”

Caller #2: “I’m just trying to understand, if it says, ‘Bus operates public school days only,’ does that mean that it operates on days when public school is on, or on the school holidays?”

Me: “That means that it operates on the days when the public schools are open, and as today is the last day of term one for public schools, then that bus operates today.”

Caller #2: “I’m just confused. Does it mean it operates on public school days or public school holidays?”

Me: “Ma’am, as it states, ‘operates public school days only,’ that means it operates on public school days only.”

I’m not sure how else to spell this out.

Caller #2: “Are you sure?”

Me: “Absolutely, ma’am.”

Caller #2: “O-okay, then.” *Hangs up*

Cue more head-desking.

I have had a bad day. My manager is being a major jerk, my coworker is being bossy, trying to order me around, and not doing her job, and I dealt with a rude customer who called me a b****. This customer that I’m dealing with now is pleasant, until the end.

Customer: “Oh, why don’t you just [return her returned item a different way]?”

Me: “Ma’am, the return is already completed.”

Customer: *Still smiling* “Oh, but I think it would be easier for you to return [item] first and then do [different item]!”

Me: *Staring at her* “Ma’am, the return is already completed. I can’t return both items once they’ve been returned once. That’s like giving you free money.”

Customer: “Oh, well, how about I just buy both items back and you do it that way so it’s easier?”

I can tell she honestly thinks she’s helping me by asking me to return an already returned item a different way, but I’m at the end of my rope.

Me: “No, it will most certainly not be easier! You’re asking me to do the exact same thing over again which will waste everyone’s time and confuse the system!”

Customer: “Oh! There’s no need to be so rude!”

After I got written up for that one, I turned in my two weeks. My boss asked me to stay and promised me a raise, but I reminded him that he promised me a raise and instead gave it to [Bossy Coworker]. I found a better job at a children’s clothing store.