Someone bought a [Brand] phone from our company a few days ago. Today, they reach out through chat because, apparently, it isn’t turning on.

Me: “Hello! How may I help you today?”

Customer: “My phone isn’t turning on. Fix it.”

I ask all the questions about brand, etc., and then I ask if the phone is charged.

Customer: “I left it in the sun.”

Me: “Okay, but is it charged?”

Customer: “It was in the sun. What don’t you understand?”

Me: “I am sorry, I understand, but did you use the phone charger?”

Customer: “Why doesn’t it charge with solar energy?”

Me: *Pauses* “That’s not how your [Brand] phone works. I’m sorry.”

Customer: “I want my phone to charge like this.”

I work as a customer service representative at a worldwide retail company selling only to companies who then sell their products to consumers or use them in their business.

A caller calls in with a product that doesn’t work. It is a common problem for this specific product (unfortunately), so I get ready to create a ticket and send her a replacement.

Me: “Can you give me the order number?”

Caller: “No, I don’t have an order number.”

Me: “That’s okay. Can’t I get your customer number?”

Caller: “No, I don’t think I have one.”

Me: “All our customers have one, but it’s okay. I can find it. Do you have a phone number?”

I proceed to look for her in my system, using various ways to search: phone number, address, name, and so on.

Me: “I can’t seem to find you. Did you buy it from us?”

Caller: “No, I bought it from [Business, which is our customer].”

Me: “Oh, I see. Then you’ll need to go to them.”

Caller: “But it is your product.”

Me: “Yes, but since you have no receipt with us and we can’t send to end-consumers, I’m afraid you’ll have to go to them, and they can call us about it using one of their orders.”

Caller: “But I can’t go there.”

Me: “I’m sorry, I’m not allowed to send you a new product; we don’t have a license for that.”

Caller: “But I bought it when I was visiting Stockholm, and I live far north of there. It would take me hours to get there. I won’t do that.”

I think for a moment; that is a problem and I do want to help her.

Me: “Well, perhaps we can find a business in that area that sells our product and can help you out? I could try to talk to them about it. Do you know any business in your area?”

Caller: “No, shouldn’t you know that?”

Me: “Well, what is your postal code?”

I try finding businesses, but I realise it will take a while to make sure it is someone selling this specific brand, as I can only see that by checking their orders or talking to a sales representative in the area (and they are sometimes difficult to get hold of). I offer to call her back.

Caller: “Why? Don’t you know your customers?”

Me: “We have quite many customers, I’m afraid.”

Caller: “No, this is too difficult. Just send it to me.

Me: “I’m not allowed to do that. Even if we wanted to, we don’t have—”

Caller: “Look. It is your product; you should replace it!”

Me: “I’m trying, but you didn’t buy it from us, so it is not that—”

Caller: *Shouting* “I am a journalist! If you don’t fix this, I’ll write an article in [Local Newspaper] about how bad your brand is!”

At this point, I’m stunned and don’t really feel like helping her anymore.

Me: “All right, do that.”

Caller: “I’m serious! It is going to ruin your whole company! And you’ll get fired for making it happen.”

Me: “Very well. We’ll see.”

Caller: “You just wait!”

She hangs up and I get ready to take the next call. When I see my boss, I tell him about the call.

Boss: “Which newspaper?”

Me: “[Local Newspaper]. It’s somewhere up in northern Sweden.”

Boss: “Huh, never heard of it.”

He walked off and we never heard about this issue again.

I work in customer service. I’m on a call with an irate woman who keeps on connecting causes and effects that have nothing to do with each other. I listen and make the known listening sounds (uh-huh, ah, yes…), but I get no space to say something in return.

Suddenly, the connection drops. I just know this lady will claim I hung up on her on purpose, but luckily, I have her phone number. I call her back.

Woman: “Eh… hello?”

Me: “Hello, you are speaking with [My Name] from [Company]. We got disconnected, so I figured I would call you back.”

Woman: “We didn’t get disconnected! I was just talking! Why are you interrupting me? Why are you so rude?”

I was working at the customer service desk. A customer came up to me screaming.

Customer: “Your employees are idiots! They can’t even tell the right fruit from the wrong one! They rang my fruit up as the wrong thing, and I demand that you correct it!”

To be fair, the two kinds of fruit look really alike.

I returned the fruit that was charged “wrongly” and charged her for the fruit she swore it was. I bet you can imagine the big smile on my face when I told her she had to pay another twenty-five cents. She was LIVID.

Caller: “Hello. When I want to log in, the system doesn’t recognise my credentials.”

Me: “Let’s see what we can do about this. Let me log in for you.”

It’s a one-way appointment system, so no password is needed. You can only sign in with a postcode/zip code and the house number and select a day you want an appointment. An ID is required, so you can’t sneak someone else’s appointment. The worst thing that can happen is a no-show from the client, so it is a calculated risk. I’m not the one making the decisions about this, and the system has been up for two years now. 

Me: “Hm, I seem to be able to log in fine. Which credentials do you fill in?”

The caller states the correct postcode and house number.

Me: “I use that, as well, and it’s going fine. Could you try it again? Perhaps there was a space somewhere.”

Caller: “I still get the error!”

Me: “Could you send me a screenshot of the error? You can mail it to [email address].”

I receive the email with the screenshot. I need a moment to think about how to reply without making the lady angry. 

Me: “I see you filled in [absolutely wrong, not even close postcode]. Have you already tried [correct postcode]?”

Caller: “All right, let me try that. Huh, it works! Thanks. But why didn’t the system work for me before?”

Me: “Because the postcode to your house is [correct postcode].”

Caller: “Yes, I know.”

Me: “If you fill that one in, the system will recognise you.”

Caller: “But why doesn’t it work with ?” 

Me: “The system is not perfect; it only recognises you if you use the postcode that belongs to your house.”

Caller: “Why?”

I need another moment.

Me: “Because the system is not perfect, but please select a day and you’re done!”

Caller: “All right, but you should tell your website department that your website needs to be improved.”

Me: “I will surely tell them about your interaction. Don’t worry about that!”