My wife and I were shopping at our local grocery store, talking to each other, deciding on what kind of bread we wanted when we were interrupted by a sweaty, panting man in a polo.

Guy: “Hi, folks! Are you using your [Grocery Chain] rewards card today?”

Wife: “Yep!”

Guy: “Well, how would you like an even better card?”

He whips out a [grocery chain] credit card from a retractable sleeve on his belt and holds it like it’s a prize on Price is Right. He then, still panting, flies into a spiel about the benefits, limits, APR, and all the details that neither my wife nor I care to take in.

Guy: “So what do you say? Ready to sign up?”

Wife: “No thanks, we’re good.”

Guy: “Are you sure? I’ll do ten push ups if you do!”

Wife: “…no thank you.”

He dejectedly left, leaving us wondering if the last shoppers he cornered did make him do the push ups. We also stopped going to that store.

I was at Walgreens as a shift lead. My pharmacy tech called me to help with a customer. As I arrive, a customer is chewing out my tech.

Me: “Can I help?”

Customer: “They won’t accept my credit card.”

I maintain eye contact with the customer and ask her to explain why while I walk to the door to get into the pharmacy.

Customer: “Oh, so now you won’t help either?!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m here to help. I just need to get in to access the computer and see what the issue is.”

I set up the POS and asked her to insert her card (it has a chip). She swiped it, so it does not work.

Me: “Ma’am, please insert it.”

She puts the non-chip end in.

Me: “Ma’am, please insert it via the chip end.”

She puts it facing the wrong way. I reach out and say:

Me: “Let me help.”

Customer: “DON’T YOU DARE TOUCH MY CARD!”

Me: “I apologize, ma’am, I was just trying to help you get the card in the machine correctly.”

Customer: “Well, I swiped it; why won’t you accept it?”

Me: “Ma’am, you aren’t inserting the card correctly; you cannot swipe it.”

She proceeds to try swiping it a few more times.

Customer: “This is stupid! You do it!”

I position the card correctly.

Me: “There, like that. Feel free to insert the card.”

Customer: “Oh, so now you won’t even help me!?”

She then storms off, calling me and the tech various unpleasant names.

I’m taking a commuter train to a rock concert in downtown Salt Lake. Just before I board, I see an email from Discover Card saying my replacement credit card was on its way because it has been reported lost/stolen.

I think, “That’s strange, I don’t remember doing that. Is this a phishing email?”

But then I look in my wallet, and sure enough, my card is gone. I call Discover, and as it turns out, it fell out of my wallet when I tapped the fare payment card against the reader. I didn’t see it happen, but someone found it at the station. Rather than go out on a spending spree (because no one EVER checks ID or signature here), they called it in and reported it.

There are still plenty of good people in this world. They just don’t make very many headlines.

Customer: “I want to return this gift card.”

Me: “That’s a Visa gift card, sir. We don’t do refunds on any type of gift cards.”

Customer: “But I put $250 on it!”

Me: “I understand, sir, but all sales are final for gift cards.”

Customer: “Do you know how much I shop here?!”

Me: “I do not, sir, and regardless of how much that is, it doesn’t change the fact that all sales are final for gift cards.”

Customer: “Well then, what the f*** am I supposed to do with this?!”

Me: “Well, sir, it is a Visa gift card. You can use it anywhere. Even here.”

The customer opens their mouth to counter my point and then stops. They hold that position for a few seconds, mouth open, and then he resets, puts the card in his wallet, and wanders off… Not sure what happened there, but I like to think I made him realize my somewhat obvious point.

Related:
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 35
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 34
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 33
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 32
The Gift Card That Keeps On Giving, Part 31

A customer is buying an item and taps their card. The machine alerts.

Me: “Sir, please insert your card.”

Customer: “Why?!”

Me: “The machine is asking you to.”

Customer: “Why?!”

Me: “It does that for some transactions. I have no control over it.”

The customer cautiously does so.

Me: “Please put in your PIN.”

Customer: “Are you gonna steal my identity?!”

Me: “No, I don’t want to be you.”

Customer: *Entering PIN.* “Why not?!”

Me: “For one, your $1.02 purchase just declined.”