That Was A Loooong Break

, , , , | Working | August 6, 2019

(I work for a little over a year at a grocery store, and then I move from Ohio to Florida. I visit Ohio a year later, and I swing by the place to chat with my friends. I used to run the self-checkouts almost exclusively. One of my ex-coworkers, who’s running the self-checkouts area, walks over to me and asks if I’m on break. I laugh and shake my head and keep talking. He takes off the handheld device and starts handing it to me.)

Ex-Coworker: “If you’re not on break, you can take over.”

Me: “I don’t work here anymore. Haven’t for almost a year now.”

(The dude was so surprised.)

1 Thumbs
526

Acting Like A Caffeine Teen

, , , , , | Working | May 21, 2019

(My coworker, who has just come in for her shift, comes up to my desk. She’s in her 20s and a fairly intelligent person, or so I thought. By my desk is a small coffee station for the residents, visitors, and staff.)

Coworker: “Is there any coffee up here?”

Me: “Probably not by this time of day. You could try in the kitchen and see if they have any.”

Coworker: *whiny voice* “I just did. They don’t. What do I do now?”

Me: *pause* “You could make some?”

Coworker: *eyes go wide* “Oh… I guess I could do that!” *trots off happily to the kitchen to do so*

Me: “I need to go home now.”

1 Thumbs
293

Living Paycheck To Announcement About Paycheck

, , , , | Working | May 20, 2019

(It’s Friday, and a payday Friday at that. I’ve already planned my bills, paid one through my mobile app, and decided what I’m getting for groceries, you know, like a normal budgeting adult. My coworker comes in and I say hello to her.)

Coworker: “Hello, [My Name].”

Me: “Hey [Coworker]. Happy payday!”

Coworker: *stops dead in her tracks, eyes go wide* “It’s payday?!”

Me: “Yes?” *laughs at her shocked expression* “How do you not know this?!”

Coworker: “It’s payday!” *does a happy dance off down the hallway* “Thanks, [My Name]!”

Me: “You’re… welcome?”

(Seriously. How do you not know when you get paid?! It must be nice not to have to worry about money!)

1 Thumbs
242

Out Of Africa

, , , , , | Working | January 21, 2019

This is when I was working on the sales floor of a large bookstore. I got along with my coworkers pretty well and we tended to chat during slow moments of the day. As it is with retail, we would abruptly stop those conversations when customers approached us needing something, and then we would continue it later on when we had another slow moment.

I had been discussing with my coworker her most recent — of many — trips to Tanzania and how she was eager to return, but we got busy and had to put the conversation on hold. After twenty or thirty minutes it died down again, and I happened to be walking by her and said, “So, when are you going back to Africa?” Then the phone rang and she turned her back to answer it before she had a chance to respond to me.

I turned around and saw a customer glaring at me. I asked if she needed any help and she very curtly said, “No, I don’t!”

It took me a moment to realize that the customer had just witnessed me — a white man — go up to my coworker — a black woman — for apparently no reason and ask her when she was going back to Africa without any other context. I’m sure she thought I was being a complete a**hole bigot!

I felt so embarrassed! But the woman left the store before I had a chance to explain it to her.

I later told my coworker about it and she thought it was funny. But she suggested I make sure to reference Tanzania directly in our future conversations about her trips.

1 Thumbs
497

Periodically Bloated

, , , , , | Working | January 21, 2019

(I’m having really bad back pain so I ask my Mum to drop a hot water bottle to work for me in the hope that it will help. I go down to the canteen there to fill it up and grab some chocolate while I’m there. Another woman is making tea at the same time and she sees my hot water bottle and chocolate.)

Worker: *sympathetically* “That time of the month, huh?”

(I laugh and gesture to my stomach.)

Worker:Wow! You get really bloated on your period. Does that not hurt?!”

Me: “Uh… I’m seven months pregnant!”

Worker: “I know they say you shouldn’t ask a woman if she’s pregnant, but I really should have copped that one, shouldn’t I? I’m so embarrassed!”

(For the next couple of weeks I seemed to pass the same woman a lot and she always jokingly pretended she didn’t notice I was pregnant. It really amused me.)

1 Thumbs
492