It’s been raining since early this morning. I should note that our ice cream shop has no parking spots in front of the store; it’s too small of a lot. All spots are on the sides and in the back. We cannot ask customers to move their vehicles if they park in front, and that makes it kind of hazardous for people who park in actual spots.

A customer pulls up in front of the store and gets out of her truck. She then walks up, holding a coupon.

Customer: “Hi! Can I use this coupon on sundaes?”

The customer hands a coupon over. I look over it and read aloud to her that the coupon is for small, medium, or large dishes or cones, adding that sundaes do not count for the coupon.

Customer: “Okay! Then may I please have a [Sundae with pecans] and a [Popular Kids’ Sundae]. Oh! Does the kids’ sundae work with the coupon?”

Me: “No, ma’am. This coupon can’t be used on any sundaes. Just small, regular, and large cones or dishes.”

Customer: “Aww, okay. Then I’ll have…” *Looks at our flavor board* “…two kids’ cups of [Popular PB Cup Flavor], instead of the kids’ sundae.”

At this point, I gave up on life and gave the customer her ice cream and the popular pecan sundae she’d ordered. She ordered two KIDS’ dishes. The smallest the coupon would accept was a small. Our kids’ sizes are one scoop and small is two scoops. Thankfully, the rest of the transaction was fine and she left. I was left standing there wondering how people can’t understand what their coupons allow them to get.

Related:
Any Given Sundae, Part 6
Any Given Sundae, Part 5
Any Given Sundae, Part 4
Any Given Sundae, Part 3
Any Given Sundae, Part 2

Our company does this thing called “My Funds,” where during certain promotional periods, if you hit a certain amount on your order, you get a credit on your account. There’re a few other criteria, as well, but customers get a little crazy about earning it. This happens over Live Chat text. 

Customer: “I placed an order last month, and it was over $400 but I only got $50 in My Funds instead of $100.”

Me: “Okay, looking into your order, it seems you used a coupon. Your order was $459 before the coupon, but you received a $66 discount, dropping you below the $400 post-coupon requirement to earn My Funds.”

Customer: “Oh, that sucks. Can I add a cheap item so I hit that amount?”

Me: “Unfortunately, your order has already been shipped, which means no changes are possible. Even if I could make a change, doing so after the order is placed disqualifies all My Funds credit.”

Customer: “Okay, I understand. What if you just move the coupon to the other item?”

Me: *Pauses* “Well, unfortunately, as your order has shipped and been delivered, no changes are possible. Please note also that any changes to an order made after it is placed disqualify it from earning My Funds.”

Customer: “Oh, okay. Thanks, anyway.”

The funny thing is, he actually saved more with the coupon! He got a $50 credit and a $66 discount, which means he saved $116 instead of the $100 he would have gotten without the coupon. I thought about pointing this out to him, but I thought he might have some trouble understanding the concept.

Related:
The Couponator 23: The Time Destroyer
The Couponator 22: Coupons Of Mass Consumption
The Couponator 21: The FINAL Sale
The Couponator 20: Coupons Of Mass Consumption
The Couponator 19: Fast Food & Furious

I’m at a craft store. I bring my yarn purchase to the register with a coupon for 40% off any regular priced item, which my item qualifies for. However, when I hand the coupon to the cashier…

Cashier: “I’m sorry; you can’t use that coupon on this purchase.”

Me: “But it’s not expired, and this brand isn’t on sale.”

Cashier: *Looking confused* “It’s not going to work even if I try.”

Me: “I just printed this coupon today. It should work.”

The cashier points to my total on the register display.

Cashier: “No, look. I promise it won’t.”

Then, I realize that the particular color of yarn I am buying is on clearance for some reason and it has rung up as a penny. 

Me: “Oh! I’m sorry; I didn’t realize the price. I guess you can’t charge me 60% of one cent.”

Cashier: “Exactly! I thought you saw the total.”

Related:
It’s Centless Trying To Argue

A caller is placing an order for several cartons of our “Extreme Buy” discounted copy paper and a desktop organizer. The paper has a disclaimer on it that no further discounts, including discount coupons, apply, and all discount coupons have a disclaimer on them that they exclude “Extreme Buy” copy paper. Neither of the disclaimers are in small print. Free gift coupons can still be used with the paper.

Me: “Your total is $159.”

Caller: “Oh, I have a coupon that I want to use.”

Me: “Okay, what is the coupon code?”

The caller gives me her coupon code.

Me: “This coupon is for a free [item] when you order $325 or more. Your total is $159. Did you want to add something to bring your total up?”

Caller: “No.”

Me: “Your order will not qualify for the coupon, then. Is there a different coupon you would like to use?”

Caller: “Hold on a moment.” *Pauses* “Use this one.” *Gives me another code*

This particular coupon is on our website’s coupon page, down at the bottom, set off from the general coupons with a bold heading that says, “Ink and Toner Coupons”.

Me: “That coupon is for a free [item] when you spend $150 on ink and toner. You don’t have any ink or toner on your order. Will you be adding some?”

Caller: “No.”

Me: “The order will not qualify for this coupon, either, then. Is there another coupon that you would like to try?”

Caller: “Yes, use this one.” *Gives another code*

Me: “That coupon is for $15 off when you order $100, but it excludes the ‘Extreme Buy’ copy paper, along with some other categories, so it would only include the price of the desk organizer, which is $10.”

Remember that the exclusion is not in small type. It is actually in a larger type than the actual coupon code is.

Caller: “You know, it didn’t used to be so hard to use coupons! There aren’t any other coupons I can use!”

We have eight free-gift coupons that she would qualify for on our coupon page. I am pretty sure she is looking at that page, because that is the only place we advertise the second code that she gave me, although technically, she could have been looking at it previously and written it down.

Me: “I apologize. We do have several other coupons that this order would qualify for. You can choose one of the following free gifts.” *Lists the gifts* “Would you like to add one of these to your order?”

Caller: “No, just cancel it.”

Me: “Cancel the coupon or the whole order?”

Caller: “No, just the copy paper. I still need that organizer.”

I work in a fast food restaurant famous for their chicken sandwiches. A lady comes in with her family, and in the middle of the order, she shows me a coupon on her phone for a free sandwich.

This isn’t too unusual, although it’s usually a card we give out, but okay. I look at it for ten seconds and realize several things: it’s a screenshot from a Google search, it’s from a completely different state, and it’s from nine years ago.

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but that’s not a coupon from our location.”

I don’t say that I know she picked the first Google image she saw or that it’s almost as old as the son she has with her.

Customer: “Well, this is the coupon they emailed me last time when they got my order wrong, but whatever…”

We usually don’t email coupons when an order is wrong. I want to applaud her for trying to use a coupon but… next time, I’d suggest not using that one.