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Someone Has To Lose In Every Game

, , , , , | Friendly | CREDIT: Matissieboy2 | June 17, 2021

When I am fourteen, I go to a gaming event near my home. A couple of friends and I bring our laptops and compete against others. It is about noon when I start my first round.

Kid: “Look, Mom!” *Pointing in my general direction* “That laptop is really cool. I want one!”

The mother comes over to me.

Mother: “Hi, sweetie. My son really likes your laptop. Can he play a match on it?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but this laptop is very expensive. I don’t trust a stranger to play on it.”

Mother: “Don’t worry; I know my kid. He’ll be fine.”

Me: *Slightly annoyed* “I’m sorry, ma’am, but like I said, I don’t trust a stranger with my equipment. The answer is no.”

It appears as if the mother understands; I don’t hear anything from her for a while. Then, I take a bathroom break. I come back from the bathroom and my laptop is gone!

Me: *To my friend* “What happened to my laptop?!”

Friend: “This woman came up to me and asked if someone was using this seat, and when I was distracted, she took it. I have no idea where they went.”

I start to panic. After running around for what feels like an eternity, I finally find the kid playing on MY laptop. When I approach, the kid’s mother starts shouting.

Mother: “Help! Help! This man is trying to steal my kid’s computer!”

Security comes and brings me to some sort of interrogation room. I explain what happened, but they don’t believe me.

Security: “Are there any witnesses that can prove your story?”

Me: “My friend and the others around could confirm it.”

We walk back to the table and the security officer asks everyone what happened individually. He comes back to me.

Security: “I’m sorry for not believing you, young man. It appears you were telling the truth all along.”

The security went to the mother and the kid and demanded that they give me back my laptop. The woman refused, and when she realized she couldn’t get her way out of it, she took the laptop and smashed it on the floor. My laptop that I’d had to save so long for was smashed to pieces.

Court didn’t exactly do her well; she had to pay back the laptop and an additional €500. Luckily, I didn’t ever see her again.


This story is part of our Best Of June 2021 roundup!

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We All Nerd Out In Our Own Way

, , , , | Right | January 18, 2021

My best friend sells handmade crafts and accessories at conventions and craft shows. At this event, an elderly woman with an accent comes to the booth and is very excited about the scarves my best friend and I made.

Woman: “I am always so cold! I wear a coat in the summer and people ask me, ‘Are you cold?’ And I say, ‘NO, I am making a FASHION STATEMENT!'”

That little old lady with no knowledge of sci-fi bought a flannel fandom-inspired scarf and made my day!


This story is part of our Feel Good roundup for January 2021!

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Why Don’t You Leave It To The Experts, Buddy?

, , , , | Working | January 18, 2021

I’m helping support a stand at a work convention for the company I work for. We resell technology from various overseas companies as their UK partner. It’s high-tech, industry-leading stuff. The stand is just to get our name out there.

We get through the morning without incident, and then, I hear my boss mutter:

Boss: “Oh, no, not this guy.” *To me* “I will let you handle this one.”

Me: “What? Who?”

Man: “Hi, [Boss], didn’t know you would be here.”

Boss: *With some mock enthusiasm* “Hi, [Man], good to see you here.”

Man: “So, you have some new technology?”

Boss: “Actually, [My Name] can give you the full introduction.”

Me: “I… Err… Sure. Let me power it up.”

I go through the technical details, benefits, and basic uses. I explain what software it’s compatible with and answer all his questions. I feel like I have done pretty well. But [Man] wants to know more.

Man: “How much is it?”

Me: “Prices will vary for each user depending on training, hardware, and software requirements. I can take some details and someone can go through it with you?”

Boss: “They start at £30,000.”

Man: “Oh, that’s expensive. If you sold them for £5,000, you would sell far more.”

I grapple with his logic and how he thinks companies can just sell things for massive losses, regardless of production or development costs. But my boss interjects again.

Boss: “Thanks, [Man], I will pass it on.”

The man disappears.

Boss: “He always does this; he comes round and acts interested, even calls the office. Then, he tells us how to run the business. He will be going around the whole convention. They nearly banned him last year. But you did fantastically.”

I was put on “[Man] watch” and became a bit of an expert on getting rid of him the quickest.

“Legal” Doesn’t Mean “Not Creepy”

, , , , | Romantic | January 6, 2021

I am eighteen and have recently graduated high school when I decide to go to a local anime and comic convention. It’s worth noting that I’m only five feet tall and am told I have a child’s face; I’m often mistaken for being maybe thirteen years old.

I’m finishing up a conversation with a seller at a booth when we have this exchange.

Seller: “Sorry, we don’t have that in stock, but we have a local store, actually! You should swing by and we’ll put you on a waiting list?”

Me: “Ah, nah, sorry. I’m actually not in town much longer. I move away to start college soon. Maybe at next year’s convention!”

We have been talking while walking away from each other to end the conversation before, but at my words, he instantly and almost cartoonishly stops dead and spins on his heels. He power-walks back to talk to me and stands uncomfortably close and leers at me.

Seller: “Oh, college, you say? I didn’t know you were going to college. Well, your… boyfriend… must be awfully proud of you, hm?”

I’m creeped out by this instant shift.

Me: “Uh. Yeah. He totally is. Bye!”

I high-tailed it out of there ASAP after that! He flipped from normal dude to creepy man as soon as he realized I was “legal.”

You Can’t Hide Nerdiness Under A Uniform

, , , , , | Legal | December 25, 2020

I am doing a photoshoot at a comic convention of people cosplaying Marvel characters. There are a lot of us, enough to completely fill up the large staircase outside of the convention center.

As the shoot wears on, I spot two police officers circling the shoot in slowly tightening circles. I let the organizer know in case the officers decide to break up the shoot. Finally, while an awesome Planet Hulk cosplayer is mean-mugging over some lady volunteers, the officers approach the shoot and I overhear one say to the other: 

Officer: “Dude, I know we’re on duty. But I’ve got to get a picture of this Hulk. This is f****** awesome!” 

Cue about ten minutes of the officers acting like giddy schoolchildren as they took selfies with their favorite superheroes before going back to their rounds.


This story is part of our Feel Good roundup for December 2020!

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