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We’re Not Playing Games With Our Games

, , , | Right | CREDIT: SandyPetersen | September 19, 2021

I own a small board game company. I’m not a “real” retail guy — props to those who are — but before the health crisis, I attended two or three game conventions a year and of course, we’d have a booth and I’d help sell our product there, along with other team members. No doubt we’ll return to the conventions once the black clouds lift completely.

Normally, our goal at a convention is to sell 100% of the product that we brought. We HATE shipping stuff back to our warehouse — SO much so that, on occasion, we’ll sell excess stock at a slight discount on the last day (Sunday). But usually, we sell out. Another important thing to remember is that our games are highly desired, and they are often out of stock online, so people are excited to see these rare games in person at the convention where they can pick one up at last. Often people will buy an extra copy to take to a friend who couldn’t make the trip.

I am at a game convention and a guy shows up with one of my highly desired but really expensive games. But lo and behold, there’s a ding in the corner of the box. The guy wants a discount.

Me: “You already bought this game. The time to ask for a discount was then.”

The guy lays down the law.

Guy: “Either give me a discount or a refund.”

Me: “No problemo, pal.”

And I give him a full refund. IN CASH. The guy is amazed but takes the money and walks away. I have no evidence he even bought that game at the convention, but I don’t care, because I know we are going to sell out.

Then, I find out what his sinister plan was. He comes back on Sunday to see if he can pick up a copy of the game at a discount because it’s the last day. Lo and behold, we have only three copies of the game remaining, and in fact, we are considering price-gouging because people are literally fighting over who gets the last copies. We don’t, though. The guy from before asks for his discount because it’s the last day, and instead, I sell all three remaining copies while he watches.

Me: “Gotta wait in line, buddy.”

He even looked at the boxes to see if one of them had the dinged corner but no, I sold that one like an hour after he turned it in.

Cheapskates Like This Takes The Rice-Cake

, , , | Right | August 23, 2021

A friend of mine calls me in a panic. She has been let down by an agency that was supposed to supply someone to help at her stall, handing out samples, taking names, answering questions, etc. I’ve done this sort of thing before and am not keen to do it again, but she needs the help.

Five hours of traveling and setting up the stand later, I get dressed up and start dutifully handing out samples.

These events are to help companies get their names out there, find interested customers, and grow their brand. Unfortunately, there are also a lot of people just looking for a free meal who will take whatever they can, often taking time away from people that could help my friend’s company grow.

Me: “Can I interest you in a sample?”

Attendee: “What is it?”

Me: “It’s a new type of rice cake, very light with subtle flavours of—”

I don’t get a chance to finish my speech as the guy nearly knocks my platter from my hands, trying to grab a handful.

Attendee: “Ugh, I don’t like this.”

He tries to put a load of food back on the platter.

Me: “There is a bin behind you.”

Attendee: “Can’t you just take it?”

Me: “There is a bin behind you.”

It is seriously closer to him than me.

Attendee: “What else you got?”

Me: “This company specialises in rice cakes; I would imagine you won’t like the rest.”

Attendee: “Oh, okay. Got any freebies?”

Me: “No, sorry.”

Well, not for you, anyway!

He walked to the next stand, grabbed a handful, and then moved onto the next. He worked his way down the row, and much of what he took seemed to go back on the plates or in the bin. Unfortunately, I had many more like him, and that’s one of the reasons small companies struggle.

You Can’t Game A Gamer

, , , | Right | CREDIT: SandyPetersen | August 15, 2021

During the convention season, my small game company has a booth selling our products in the dealer’s room. We have a rather hot and heavy four days of sales activity with hyper-kinetic gamer geeks flush with cash and caffeine buying everything.

Customer: “We saw [Expensive Luxury Game] at [Other Store] and it was $50 cheaper.”

Me: “Great. You should buy it.”

Customer: “Don’t you want to beat their deal?”

Me: “I am literally the manufacturer of [Expensive Luxury Game]. [Other Store] bought their game either from me or from a distributor, who bought it from me. In either case, I already got paid for it once.”

Customer: *Looking victorious* “Then why should I buy it from you?”

Me: “No reason, really. Most of those games are bought from other sellers, not from my company directly. Maybe it’s cool to get it directly from the designer. I can sign it if you want.”

The customer walked off, kind of annoyed. Later, they came back and bought a copy from me without any discount.

Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 17

, , | Right | July 29, 2021

I’m an artist set up at a convention. My boyfriend is with me, though he is not involved at all with the creation of my products. We’re both sitting at my booth when a guy comes up.

Customer: “Oh, cool, [Video Game] stickers!” *Looks at my boyfriend* “Do you have any [Character] stuff?”

Me: “I don’t with me, but I have some on my online store and I’m working on some new [Video Game] designs!”

The guy gives me a weird look and keeps looking at my boyfriend. He directs any questions to my boyfriend and seems offended when I answer most of them.

Customer: “Man, can you butt out? I wanna talk with the dude who made the stuff.”

Boyfriend: “Yeah, that’s her. I’m just here to help her out.”

Customer: “There’s no way. Girls don’t know anything about [Video Game]!”

I show him my tablet, where I’ve been working on some designs from said game.

Me: “Dude, keep your sexism at home.”

He quietly bought a whole set of stickers and dropped $5 in my tip jar.

Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 16
Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 15
Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 14
Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 13
Can’t Hear You Over The Sound Of Your Ovaries, Part 12

Someone Has To Lose In Every Game

, , , , , | Friendly | CREDIT: Matissieboy2 | June 17, 2021

When I am fourteen, I go to a gaming event near my home. A couple of friends and I bring our laptops and compete against others. It is about noon when I start my first round.

Kid: “Look, Mom!” *Pointing in my general direction* “That laptop is really cool. I want one!”

The mother comes over to me.

Mother: “Hi, sweetie. My son really likes your laptop. Can he play a match on it?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but this laptop is very expensive. I don’t trust a stranger to play on it.”

Mother: “Don’t worry; I know my kid. He’ll be fine.”

Me: *Slightly annoyed* “I’m sorry, ma’am, but like I said, I don’t trust a stranger with my equipment. The answer is no.”

It appears as if the mother understands; I don’t hear anything from her for a while. Then, I take a bathroom break. I come back from the bathroom and my laptop is gone!

Me: *To my friend* “What happened to my laptop?!”

Friend: “This woman came up to me and asked if someone was using this seat, and when I was distracted, she took it. I have no idea where they went.”

I start to panic. After running around for what feels like an eternity, I finally find the kid playing on MY laptop. When I approach, the kid’s mother starts shouting.

Mother: “Help! Help! This man is trying to steal my kid’s computer!”

Security comes and brings me to some sort of interrogation room. I explain what happened, but they don’t believe me.

Security: “Are there any witnesses that can prove your story?”

Me: “My friend and the others around could confirm it.”

We walk back to the table and the security officer asks everyone what happened individually. He comes back to me.

Security: “I’m sorry for not believing you, young man. It appears you were telling the truth all along.”

The security went to the mother and the kid and demanded that they give me back my laptop. The woman refused, and when she realized she couldn’t get her way out of it, she took the laptop and smashed it on the floor. My laptop that I’d had to save so long for was smashed to pieces.

Court didn’t exactly do her well; she had to pay back the laptop and an additional €500. Luckily, I didn’t ever see her again.

This story is part of our Best Of June 2021 roundup!

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