A Noble Thing To Do

, , , , , | | Hopeless | May 30, 2019

My brother is a huge Doctor Who fan and attended a local science fiction convention where one of the former Doctors was holding a symposium. To my brother’s dismay, the symposium filled up just as he arrived.

He was sitting on a bench in the convention hall, dejected, when he heard a woman say, “Oh, you don’t want to go to that! It’s boring! Hang around with me, instead!” He looked up to see the actress who played a popular female companion standing over him. She spent part of her day with him as they went around the convention together.

Whenever I become too cynical, I think about how Catherine Tate made sure a disappointed Doctor Who fan had the best day ever. Donna Noble truly is a hero!

There’s Acting Nice And Then There’s BEING Nice

, , , , , | | Hopeless | May 15, 2019

(At my favorite convention, I decide to camp out overnight for the chance to enter a drawing that would get me into an autograph session for one of my favorite shows. A miracle occurs and I get in! Later that day, I’m at the signing and get to talk briefly to the cast. The first actress I talk to isn’t new to show business, but is kind of new to the convention circuit.)

Actress #1: “Hi! How are you?”

Me: “I’m great! How are you?”

Actress #1: “Oh, this is great, but I’m a bit tired.”

Me: “Yeah, me, too. I waited ten hours for the drawing this morning.”

(She sort of just stares blankly at me, trying to process this information. It never occurred to me she didn’t know this was how long we had to wait.)

Actress #1: “Wait, honey, where did you sleep?”

Me: “Well, outside.”

Actress #1: “YOU SLEPT OUTSIDE?!”

Me: “Yeah, but we all did. That’s the only way to get into this.”

Actress #1: “Wow…”

(She smiles at me and I move on. The next actress plays my favorite female character other than the lead, and I’m so excited to meet her.)

Me: “It was worth sleeping ten hours on concrete to meet you.”

Actress #2: *takes my hand in hers and smiles* “Love, I would do the same thing. It’s so great to meet all of you.”

(I’m on cloud nine when I meet the next actor. I’m cosplaying as the lead character.)

Actor: “Oh, hey, [Lead Character], how are you? Oh, wait, you’re not [Lead Character]! What’s your name?”

(I absolutely melted, told him my name, and thanked him. There have sadly been a lot of stories of celebrities letting people down and being terrible people, but I feel like sometimes we need a reminder there are some really great ones out there who are genuinely good people who love their fans.)

That’s Your Signature Art

, , , , | | Right | May 12, 2019

(I go to a large convention to sell my art. Things go well and it’s eventually time to close the shop. Security ushers the visitors to the exit and while we put away things, I get visited by a last-minute shopper.)

Shopper: “Oh, this is lovely. I would like to have one of these, please.”

Me: “Certainly.”

Shopper: “I want a perfect one, without any blemishes or spots.”

Me: “Of course!”

(I create and print all my art myself and am a perfectionist, so I don’t sell anything I’m not satisfied with myself.)

Me: “Here you go, ma’am.”

Shopper: “No, not this one. This one has that stain on it.”

Me: *looking at it* “I don’t see any stains, I’m sorry. Where?”

Shopper: “Here! I want one that is perfect!”

Me: “All right, here is another one.”

Shopper: “This one is stained, as well!”

Me: “Where, ma’am? I can’t see the stain myself.”

Shopper: “Here!” *points at it*

Me: “That is my signature, ma’am.”

(She looked at the art, but then said this version was… adequate enough. Oh, well, a sale is a sale!)

Unfiltered Story #140349

, , | Unfiltered | February 14, 2019

(I’m a woman. I’m at an anime convention, dressed as the female main character from the anime “Sword Art Online.” A guy walks up to me, dressed in a sloppy outfit that I could only assume was based off of my character’s love interest in the show.)

Guy: *smirks* Nice outfit.

Me: Thanks! Made it myself.

Guy: Do you even know what you’re supposed to be?

Me: Um, [Character] from Sword Art Online?

Guy: Hmph. Well, our costumes fit each other. Wanna go out sometime?

Me: Sorry, buddy, I’m taken. *my boyfriend is talking with some friends of his, and I point to him*

Guy: *walks away while muttering* Stupid fake geek b****, doesn’t even know who she is…

Me: Excuse me? I’ll have you know that this is my favourite anime, and you should keep your sexist comments to yourself!

Guy: B****. At least I know the d*** show.

Me: Oh really?

(The guy smirks again as I burst into the show’s theme song, which is in Japanese.)

Me: Yume de takaku tonda
Karada wa donna fuan matotte mo furiharatteiku
Nemoru chiisa na omoi hirogaridashite
Kizuku yowai watashi kimi ga ireba
Kurai sekai, tsuyoku ireta
Nagai yume miru kokoro wa sou
Eien de!

(The guy’s mouth drops open and he runs away, while I get a round of applause.)

Trying To Comic Con You

, , , , | Right | February 6, 2019

(I volunteer at a few of the different pop culture conventions that roll through town each year. This year I am working guest management at one, which involves working closely with the VIP guests — TV/movie celebs — and ensuring that patrons are lined up correctly and, importantly, not taking photos of the guests. This a rule from both guests and management. Some guests, for an extra $20 or so, will take a selfie with you, but most would prefer you pay for the professional photos. Most patrons are okay with this rule and when I’ve photobombed their camera and reminded them of the rule they apologise and walk off. Not this guy.)

Me: “Hi. Just so that you’re aware, there are no photos of this area behind me at all.”

Patron: “I was only taking a photo of the lines.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but as long as there are guests in the autograph booth, not even a photo of the lines is allowed.”

Patron: “Well, you didn’t even ask me if I was taking a photo! I could have been using Wikipedia, for all you know!”

Me: “That’s why I advised you of the—“

Patron: *now yelling* “NO! YOU CAN’T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!”

Me: “Actually, mate, I can.”

Patron: *now getting closer to me, looking like he’s going to burst*

Me: “I think you need to move along now.”

Patron: “FINE!”

(He then grabs my lanyard from around my neck with my volunteer photo ID and name.)

Patron: “THANKS, [MY NAME].”

(He then threw my lanyard back at me and walked away. I’ve heard all the smarta** remarks about the “no photos beyond this point” rule, but never in three years of volunteering have I had someone get so in my face and practically assault me. It was an adrenaline rush, and I enjoyed being salty with a smile on my face the entire time.)

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