Sounds Like A Flavor Of Another Green Thing That Comes In A Bag

, | Minneapolis, MN, USA | Right | March 4, 2017

Customer: “I’m looking for some chips my wife asked me to get.”

Me: “Sure, what kind?”

Customer: “She said ‘pixie conifer.’”

Me: “Sorry… what?”

Customer: “Pixie conifer. In a green bag.”

Me: “I’ve… never heard of anything like that.”

Customer: “Well, she used to work with trees. That might have something to do with it.”

Me: “Hang on, let me check here…”

(I pull out my phone and Google ‘pixie conifer’ just to see if anything comes up. Unsurprisingly, nothing.)

Me: “You said ‘pixie’, right? Like a fairy?”

Customer: “Yeah. Pixie Conifer. Green bag.”

Me: “Sorry, I’ve never heard of such a thing. All of our chips are on those shelves if you want to look, but that’s a new one to me.”

Customer: “Hang on.”

(He pulls out his phone and dials, wandering off so I can’t hear his end of it.)

Customer: “All right, I talked to her. She wants ‘pickle vinegar.’”

Me: “Thaaat makes more sense. Right over here…”

Checking You Out At The Checkout

| Birmingham, England, UK | Romantic | February 17, 2017

(There are several small, family-owned corner stores around where I live. The nearest is just five minutes away and the staff are very friendly and welcoming when I go in, but it closes around nine pm and I frequently work until nearly midnight. There’s another store that’s open 24 hours just two minutes around the corner but I stopped going there after several uncomfortable experiences with one of the workers. I never reported it because all the workers are the owner’s family.  One late night about a month ago, I needed to pick up something. Peering into the 24 hour store, I didn’t see the worker and decided I had to chance it. I didn’t see him any time I checked for about a month after and thought that maybe something had happened like he’d quit or been fired or was working a different shift. Two nights ago I didn’t check for him before I went in and he was there when I got to the till. For context I am mid-20s but I look younger. He looks between 35 and early 40s.)

Me: *places items on the counter, clearly avoiding looking at him*

Worker: “Oh, hello. I haven’t seen you in a while. I was beginning to think you’d moved away.”

Me: *refusing to engage him*

Worker: “I still think you’re very pretty, you know. And you’re still not married? No boyfriend?”

Me: *still not answering*

Worker: *scanning my items and bagging them* “I still don’t understand why you won’t give me your number. I’m kind of heartbroken. Why won’t you give me your number? I could make you very happy.”

Me: *realising that he isn’t going to take my silence as an answer* “Like I told you last time, I don’t want you to have my number.”

Worker: “But I would be a nice person for you. We would be happy. I was very worried about you. I know you have a phone.”

Me: *give him my card to pay* “I don’t care. I don’t want to give you my number.”

Worker: *as he is processing my payment* I think you are being very silly. We could be very happy together. You should give me your number.

(I see the receipt print and snatch my card off him because I’ve had enough.)

Me: “I don’t want to give you my number. I am not interested in you. I have never been interested in you. I have said no multiple times as politely as I can and if you don’t take ‘no’ as an answer now, why the h*** would you take it as an answer at any other part of our non-existent lives together? You always ask very invasive questions and I always ask you not to. You once tried to hold my items hostage in an attempt to get me to give you my number and you constantly tell me how pretty I look despite me telling you how uncomfortable that makes me feel. You don’t even know my name yet you constantly pass judgement on me for ‘not being married’ and then you promise to ‘save me from the shame if only I’d give you my number.’ You want to know why I haven’t been here in a while? It’s because of you. It’s because I don’t want to deal with you and frankly I’ve had enough. Thank you. I will not be coming back.”

(He looked like a kicked puppy as I took my items and left but I refuse to feel sorry. I don’t even walk past that store any more.)

Using Rude Language

| Bethesda, Wales, UK | Right | February 13, 2017

(A good 90% of our customers speak Welsh, so I end up speaking Welsh 90% of the time.)

Me: *in Welsh* “Good evening, sir. Would you like a carrier bag for your shopping?”

Customer: *unintelligible grunt*

Me: *still in Welsh* “Was that ‘yes’ to a bag, sir?”

Customer: *in English* “What?”

Me: *in English* “Sorry, sir! Would you like a bag for your purchases?”

Customer: “Do I look Welsh to you?”

Me: “I couldn’t say, sir. I noticed a daffodil and a dragon pin in your jacket and took you to be local. I am sorry if I caused offence.”

Customer: “You shouldn’t speak Welsh.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “You shouldn’t speak Welsh. It’s rude.”

(I pondered arguing back about his own rudeness for telling me I should not speak my language in my country, but settled for just saying “sorry” again and completing his transaction in silence.)

Making A Mocha-ry Of Yourself, Part 2

| East Stroudsburg, PA, USA | Right | February 5, 2017

(The convenience store I work at also has a deli and does specialty drinks like lattes and the like.)

Customer: “I ordered a caramel mocha, but, could I get that with no mocha. I want chocolate instead.”

(I am slightly confused as to what she’s saying so I ask her to repeat herself.)

Customer: “I want chocolate instead of mocha.”

Coworker: “Ma’am, you do realize that mocha IS chocolate?”

An Exacting Complication

| BC, Canada | Working | January 26, 2017

(I and two of my friends are at a convenience store buying drinks. My friends drink is 2.73 including tax. He hands the cashier exactly 2.73. But the cashier doesn’t take it.)

Friend: “Here you go.”

Cashier: “This isn’t enough.”

Friend: “What do you mean. You said it was 2.73 and I gave you 2.73 exactly.”

Cashier: “Exact change isn’t enough.”

Friend: “What the h*** are you on about. I gave you the exact money. Why can’t I have this drink if I gave the exact change?”

Cashier: “Fine, I’ll cover it this time.”

Friend: *confused face*

Cashier: “Go. Before I change my mind about helping you.”

(My friend was muttering about the cashier all the way back to his house.)

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