Using Rude Language

| Bethesda, Wales, UK | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Language & Words

(A good 90% of our customers speak Welsh, so I end up speaking Welsh 90% of the time.)

Me: *in Welsh* “Good evening, sir. Would you like a carrier bag for your shopping?”

Customer: *unintelligible grunt*

Me: *still in Welsh* “Was that ‘yes’ to a bag, sir?”

Customer: *in English* “What?”

Me: *in English* “Sorry, sir! Would you like a bag for your purchases?”

Customer: “Do I look Welsh to you?”

Me: “I couldn’t say, sir. I noticed a daffodil and a dragon pin in your jacket and took you to be local. I am sorry if I caused offence.”

Customer: “You shouldn’t speak Welsh.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “You shouldn’t speak Welsh. It’s rude.”

(I pondered arguing back about his own rudeness for telling me I should not speak my language in my country, but settled for just saying “sorry” again and completing his transaction in silence.)

Making A Mocha-ry Of Yourself, Part 2

| East Stroudsburg, PA, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink

(The convenience store I work at also has a deli and does specialty drinks like lattes and the like.)

Customer: “I ordered a caramel mocha, but, could I get that with no mocha. I want chocolate instead.”

(I am slightly confused as to what she’s saying so I ask her to repeat herself.)

Customer: “I want chocolate instead of mocha.”

Coworker: “Ma’am, you do realize that mocha IS chocolate?”

Related:
Making A Mocha-ry Of Yourself

Trying To Buy A Little Christmas Spirit

| NM, USA | Food & Drink, Holidays

(In my state, it is illegal to sell alcohol on Christmas — and, yes, I’m well aware that this violates separation of church and state. It does lead to some interesting conversations.)

Customer: “Hi there, can I get a bottle of [Brand] whiskey?”

Me: “Sorry, it’s actually illegal to sell alcohol on Christmas in New Mexico.”

Customer: “How about I give you an extra $20?”

Me: “Tell you what. If you want to do my mandatory six months in federal prison, and pay my $5,000 fine, sure.”

Customer: *shocked expression* “Oh, wow, um, never mind. Thanks.” *leaves*

The Lighter Way To Not Be Closed Minded

| Merseyside, England, UK | At The Checkout, Time

(I’m the foolish customer here. I walk into the mini-mart near my house late one evening, pick up a basket, and start shopping. After two minutes, there’s a surprised cough from behind the tills.)

Cashier: “Um, you do realise we’re closed, yeah?”

Me: “Oh. Are you?”

Cashier: “Yeah, the shutters are down, the lights are mostly off, the barrier is across the car park…”

Me: “Oh… OH! Sorry! I’m far, far too self-absorbed to notice something as subtle as the shutters being down and the lights being off.”

(The cashier bursts out laughing.)

Me: “I’ll go. Sorry to have delayed you going home!”

Cashier: “Nah, don’t worry, I haven’t cashed up yet; I’ll put your stuff through for making me laugh.”

(I really have to start paying more attention to my surroundings!)

Related:
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 23
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 22
Not Very Closed Minded, Part 21

H2-No

| Niagara Falls, ON, Canada | Food & Drink

(A customer is looking at the bottles of pop in the cooler, obviously searching for something.)

Me: “Can I help you find something, sir?”

Customer: “Yeah, do you have any water? I see diet Sprite, but that’s not quite the same.”

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