Piano No No

| Los Angeles, CA, USA | Learning | November 20, 2016

(We have a musical theater program at my school so there are pianos in some of the classrooms. My class is starting so we are all moving items left behind out of the space. I’m moving the piano which I usually do because it moves on wheels. It tilts and falls on me.)

Classmate: *screaming bloody murder* “It fell on her! Oh, my god, the piano fell on her!”

(Apparently, one of the wheels was broken, but the previous class failed to notify anyone.)

Me: *dazed and numb* “Can someone help me? I think I’m stuck.”

Teacher: “Don’t move!”

Classmate: *lifting from the opposite end causing more damage* “I got it.”

Me: “No! Stop! Please stop!”

(A couple other classmates come and lift it from my side — common sense! My teacher and one of those classmates help me up the stairs to get bandaged up at the office. She even blew on my boo-boos before putting on the bandages.)

Teacher: “Why don’t we go back downstairs to get your stuff? I’ll get some ice for you.” *after getting back* “All right, I’ll see you tomorrow. Can you help her back to the bungalow? Rest up!”

Me: “What?! No! Please! I’ve worked really hard. Please let me stay.”

Teacher: *flabbergasted* “Um, er, oh, ok. Sure!”

(She even let me perform my monologue, albeit sitting down with a chair under my injured leg. I’ll never forget the sweet, motherly kindness and understanding of my teacher that day, the stupidity of that girl further injuring me, and my other classmate carrying me ALL the way from class to my front door, princess style!)

Suffering From A Reptile Dysfunction

| South Deerfield, MA, USA | Right | September 17, 2010

(I am holding one of our Bearded Dragon Lizards for customers to pet.)

Customer: “Okay, so I know they’re Bearded Dragons, but what are they?”

Me: “They are Bearded Dragons.”

Customer: “I know that, but aren’t they a type of insect or something?”

Me: “No, ma’am. They are a type of reptile.”

Customer: “Oh. Are they related to the ones that breathe fire?”

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