Must Have Been Smoking A Half-Pipe

| Denton, TX, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Technology

(I work the front in a local computer repair shop and am in charge of answering phones and scheduling service. The phone rings and I answer.)

Me: “How can I help you?”

Caller: “Do you guys have any skateboards?”

Me: “No, I’m sorry, sir. We are actually a computer repair company.”

Caller: “Oh…” *long pause* “So, do you guys have any skateboards?”

Me: “… No, sir. We only sell and work on computers.”

Caller: “Oh. Okay.” *hangs up*

Vacation Crime

| ME, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Criminal & Illegal, Liars & Scammers, Technology

(I work for a computer repair shop which gets a lot of work orders from a big company because we’re nearby and are known for how fast we repair units. We also use receipts for orders that are being picked up by others.)

Customer: “Hey, I’m here to pick up a computer for [Supervisor].”

Me: “Do you have the repair receipt for their computer?”

Customer: “No, just use my ID.” *shows me work ID*

Me: “Unfortunately, sir, I’m not allowed to give you any computer without a receipt due to security reasons.”

Customer: *suddenly very angry* “Look! I’m an executive at [Big Company]. I can pick up as many computer orders as I want! Just shut up and do your **** job and give me [Supervisor]’s computer!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. But regardless of who you are, I cannot give you any computer without a receipt.”

(The door jingle goes off, meaning another customer has come into the shop.)

Customer: “That’s it! I’m gonna have your a** fired, you incompetent f***! I’ve never been treated so rudely!”

Me: “Well, I hate to repeat myself but again, we’re not allo—”.”

(At this point I notice a police officer and security guard from [Big Company] standing behind the man.)

Customer: *practically yelling at this point* “What?! Not allowed to give me [Supervisor]’s computer?! Well, I’ll –”

Police Officer: “Mr. [Customer]. You’re under arrest for attempted robbery.”

(The customer turns around to see the two men, and makes a break for the door only to be tackled in seconds and taken away by the police officer.)

Security Guard: “Can you believe that guy? He quit and threatened to steal [Supervisor]’s computer all because he didn’t get the vacation time he wanted.”

Common Sense Has Folded

| Wilsonville, OR, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology

Customer: “Where are all my old emails? I had them in the deleted items box so I could refer to them.”

Me: “They were removed from the deleted items box because they were deleted and you no longer wanted them.”

Customer: “I store them there so I only have to push a button to get them filed. Also so I can find out who contacted me previously about a construction contract I have in case I get sued.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. They were in the deleted items box and they were deleted to help ease the migration from POP to IMAP.”

Customer: “Can you restore all my emails?”

Me: “With your backup I can put them in a folder.”

Customer: “What’s a folder?”

Me: “It’s a place to put email you want to save, manually.”

Customer: “That seems like a lot of extra work. Why can’t I just push a button?”