Banking On Them Getting To That Part Of The Fine Print

, , , , , , | Right | February 15, 2019

(I work at the admissions desk of a museum, selling entry tickets. It is an extremely busy day as it is a public holiday and the weather is nice. Even with every till open and as many staff as possible trying to get people through the doors, the waiting time for the visitors is still around an hour and a half. A small family approaches my desk to pay for their tickets.)

Me: “Hello, I’m sorry about the wait today.”

Customer: “I want to use this two-for-one voucher.”

Me: “Oh, I’m so sorry, but unfortunately we can’t accept two-for-one vouchers on bank holidays.”

Customer: “What?”

Me: “We’re unable to accept that voucher today, I’m afraid.”

Customer: “You mean to tell me that we’ve stood in this queue for two hours, and now you’re going to tell me that I can’t even use my voucher?!”

Me: “I’m very sorry about the wait; we’re extremely busy today. But it does state clearly at the bottom of the voucher that it cannot be used on bank holidays.”

Customer: “Are you stupid?! Do you honestly think that I would have stood in this queue for hours and hours and not even bothered to read this? It doesn’t say anywhere on this voucher that it can’t be used today, nowhere!”

Me: “It does say at the bottom—“

Customer: “No, it does not! I think your attitude is appalling. You’re just trying to con me out of a deal! I think you’re just trying to scam people and pocket the difference! To prove it to you, I am going to stand here and read the contents of this voucher out loud, so you’ll hear it doesn’t state that anywhere, and then I want to speak to your manager about your attitude!”

(I resisted the urge to point out that I do not work on commission and am certainly not a thief, and patiently stood there as she loudly read the entire contents of the voucher to me. At this point, she’d raised her voice enough to attract the attention of other customers in the queue. She read the spiel about how the voucher couldn’t be used with any other offer and so on, all neatly laid out in bullet points, in a large enough font… until she reached the BOLDED bullet point about the voucher not being accepted on bank holidays and abruptly stopped talking. She refused to even look at me as she handed her purse to her husband and walked away, leaving him and their very embarrassed-looking children to purchase their tickets.)

Your Insults Can Just Walkie On By

, , , , , , | Right | February 12, 2019

(Many of the associates in my store have learned that it’s easier to clip our walkie-talkies to our back pockets instead of a front pocket or our belts. It prevents us from constantly whacking the walkies with our arms, hitting it against displays, and so on. One day, a customer sees my walkie clipped onto my back pocket. I’m an overweight female.)

Customer: *insultingly* “I’m surprised your radio doesn’t break when you sit on it.”

Me: “HA! I wish I had the chance to sit down around here! I’ve been here for six hours now and haven’t had a chance to sit down once.”

(In a store with too few employees, we were always SO busy that many of us are forced to skip breaks and only take the barest of lunches on every shift. Ignoring the way this man is commenting on my weight AND has to have been looking at my butt while I work, I try to be civil.)

Me: “And when I do finally get a break, I take this thing off.”

Customer: “Oh.”

(His wife smacked him on the arm, and they paid for their copies and left without another word. I hope she gave him a talking to when they were on their way home!)

Fake Stranger Danger Danger

, , , , , | Related | February 12, 2019

(My brother has a wicked sense of humor and loves to troll people. He never means any real harm by it, but not everyone knows how to handle it. Our mother has been forced to learn from experience. We’re shopping with our mother and my fourteen-year-old brother. This is also during an era when there was a string of commercials on television about what children should do if a stranger tries to take them from a store.  On this particular day my brother has been bored and is dragging his feet.)

Mother: *to brother* “Will you come on already? We’re almost done.” *tugs on his arm at this point*

Brother: *throws himself to the floor* “THIS ISN’T MY MOMMY!”

(Everyone around us stops to stare. I expect my mother tear into him, but instead, she stays completely calm.)

Mom: “Well, if I’m not your mother, I guess I don’t have to give you a ride home or feed you any of this.”

Brother: *sheepishly gets to his feet*  

(He did not try that one again.)

This Method Of Dealing With Scammers Is Going Viral

, , | Legal | February 9, 2019

(A scam artist calls my house. I answer.)

Scammer: “There is a problem with your computer.”

Me: “Which one?”

Scammer: “Actually, this is a routine check-up. I’m getting a notification that there is a problem with your computer.”

Me: “Which computer?”

Scammer: “Actually, it’s a problem with your Internet. Whenever you log in to the Internet or check your email, it downloads a virus.”

Me: “That’s horrible!”

Scammer: “This is what we need to do…”

(I cut him off, sounding horrified.)

Me: “I don’t even have an email!”

(He hung up. I wonder why.)

One Day Someone Will Give Him A Knuckle Sandwich

, , , , , | Right | February 8, 2019

(I walk into a local [Sandwich Shop], a very small location with only one employee working the counter at a time. There is one customer already in front of me, who is ordering for his family, and I can clearly see that this guy is already agitated. He’s pacing around the store, barely looking at the employee, and barking orders at her while he asks his family what they want. Being in food service, as well, that already gets my dander up, because I HATE those kinds of people. But the tiny girl behind the counter is doing the best she can, being genial and polite to this gentleman, and getting his sandwiches for him. But all of a sudden, out of the blue, he just starts going off.)

Customer: “Excuse me. What is that look for?”

(This girl has not changed her expression the entire time. When he speaks to her about this, she is clearly confused.)

Employee: “I’m sorry… What?”

Customer: “You’re giving me some look. Do we have a problem?”

Employee: *still politely* “No, sir, we don’t have a problem.”

(The employee then turns to get his second sandwich from the toaster and he seems to leave it like that. But as soon as she turns around to ask him what he wants on the second sandwich, he goes off again.)

Customer: “Look. Clearly, you have a problem with me. I see it in your look. What did you say to me? Why are you being rude?”

Employee: *still polite as she can, but she is now getting a little upset* “Sir, I don’t have any look! I haven’t said anything to you!”

(I’ve had it with the guy, and since he keeps insisting she is being rude and giving him nasty looks, I finally cut in.)

Me: “Sir, I’ve been watching the whole time and this girl is doing fine. Her expression has not changed, and she is only asking what you want for toppings. Just order your sandwich and leave her alone!”

(I want to say more, but since his daughter is sitting right there, I don’t want to swear at him and show him what it is REALLY like for someone to be rude to him. Once the customer sees me jump to the employee’s aid, however, he finally shuts up after muttering to himself.)

Customer: “Okay, okay, fine… Jesus Christ…”

(He said nothing more after that, paying for his sandwiches and sitting down to eat. When it was my turn I made it a point to be clear and exceedingly polite when placing my order, just to rub it in what a d**k he was. When I got to the counter, the employee said it was on the house and was clearly grateful that I’d stepped in. I still sat near the counter while the guy was there, just in case he tried to harass the girl again. I’m so sick of people who think it’s okay to harass food workers.)

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