Not Too Chicken To Stand Up To Them

, , , , , , | Right | July 24, 2018

(I am working the hot meat counter at a supermarket. When it comes near to closing time, we reduce the hot meat down if we have a lot of it left to get rid of. A woman walks up to me about half an hour from closing time. There are three whole hot chickens left.)

Customer: “Why aren’t these chickens reduced?”

Me: “We only reduce them down if we have a lot left, or if it’s bang on closing time. We only have three left, so these may still go as there is still half an hour of trading time left.”

Customer: “But you always reduce them down; I want these chickens reduced!”

Me: “Well, today we do not have enough left to warrant a reduction.”

Customer: “But you are obliged to reduce them down. You reduce them down now so I can take one. Everywhere else does it; you’re out of order.”

Me: “I am not obliged to reduce them down. Obviously, ideally we want to sell them at full price.”

(The woman continues to rant, getting progressively ruder, about how out of order it is to sell these chickens at full price at this time of day. While she is doing this, a girl doing her shopping overhears and looks a bit annoyed at this woman, but then walks off.)

Me: *sigh* “If there are any left bang on closing time, I will then reduce them.”

Customer: “Fine, I will wait.”

(The woman proceeds to wait there for half an hour, giving me nasty looks as I clean the department. At closing time, the chickens are still there, so I make up the reduction stickers, bag up the chickens, and put them on top of the counter. The girl from earlier has reappeared.)

Girl: *to the woman* “You know, you really shouldn’t be so rude to people.”

(The girl proceeds to grab all three reduced chickens, and then runs off with her trolley to the checkout. The woman stares after her in shock.)

Me: *calling after girl* “Thank you for shopping at [Supermarket]!”

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Pulled The Rug Out From Under Them

, , , , , | Friendly | July 23, 2018

(I have just purchased an outdoor area rug. I wheel it out to my Kia Soul and am just opening the hatch when I hear a loud, mocking voice say:)

Person: “She doesn’t really think she’s going to get that in that dinky car; does she?”

(I can see that the couple has stopped their car to watch with amused expressions. Without seeming to notice them, I tip the rug from the cart, get a grip on it, say loudly:)

Me: “Yes, she does!”

(And then I tossed the rug in, where it fit perfectly. The mocking couple were slack-jawed and stunned. I admit it; that felt wonderful!)

Refunder Blunder Torn Asunder

, , , , | Right | July 23, 2018

(A woman who frequents my store has a habit of buying something on sale, usually with additional coupons and price matching– or complaining until we make up a discount for her — then “forgetting” her receipt upon return. Without a receipt, an item must be returned for the price that day. Many of us are aware of what she is doing, but we cannot call her on it or refuse the return because we “think” she’s scamming us. On this day, I am on register. I see her walking toward the store from the parking lot and notify my manager. She comes to the front and tells me to go straighten up a nearby shelf. The woman enters with an aquarium filtration system in her cart. Today, this system is $200.)

Customer: “I want my money back.”

Manager: “Welcome to [Store]. Do you have your receipt?”

Customer: “Just give me my money.”

Manager: “Could I get your phone number or membership card?”

Customer: *rattles off phone number* “Why?”

Manager: “Without your receipt, I can only give you store credit. Do you remember how you paid?”

Customer: “My bank card! Are you going to give my money back or do I have to call corporate again?”

Manager: “I apologize for your wait, ma’am. I was just researching your receipt history.”

Customer: “That’s an invasion of privacy! The manager always gives me cash.”

Manager: “Which manager is that?”

Customer: “Oh, uh, some guy.”

Manager: “Right. Okay, I see that you purchased this filter a little over a week ago.”

Customer: “Well—”

Manager: “And after the membership discount and what appears to be a price match, you paid $90. That’s a great deal!”

Customer: “But—”

Manager: “Your money will be credited to the account linked to the card ending in [numbers].”

Customer: “I want the full $200! This is ridiculous!”

Manager: “Just following policy, ma’am. Your money will be credited to your account in three to five business days, depending on your bank. Have a nice day!”

(My manager then took the cart from the woman and walked to the back of the store without another word.)

The Demands Fell Right In His Lap

, , , , , , | Right | July 20, 2018

(I am a customer in this one, at a popular pizza chain with a friend. We have spent the day shopping and are getting a bite for dinner. There is a family at the next table across from us, and the husband is kicking off at everything. When they order drinks he screams at the waitress because he says she got his order wrong. He keeps saying they got things wrong or that they’ve had to wait for a long time — it is Friday night and it is the dinner time rush — and he just keeps being really rude. It is obvious he is just trying to eat for free, because he keeps saying he ordered something different when we and his wife know they’ve brought exactly what he ordered. The wife is sitting there, just getting so pissed off, begging him to be quiet. She keeps trying to correct him, saying, “But that’s what you ordered,” but he keeps telling her to shut up.)

Wife: “Will you stop making a scene? I just wanted a nice family dinner.”

Husband: “Shut up! When I come for a meal and pay this much for a bit of bread with some cheese and tomato on it, which probably only cost them a few pennies, I demand nothing less than perfection!”

(The waitress heads over with refills the husband ordered. She looks close to tears; the guy has gotten nastier as the night progresses, and has begun to call her names. Even the manager is keeping close by, ready to chuck him out, but he waits. The waitress is in such a rush to get him his drink so he can finish and go that she trips just as she gets to the table, and the glasses clatter over on the table near the husband. Luckily, most of the liquid misses him and he only gets a few splotches on his knee, but that is it. He explodes in a fit of rage. The manager comes over when he starts shouting obscenities. The wife looks so fed up, angry, and embarrassed.)

Manager: “I’m sorry, sir, but I’m going to have to ask you to keep it down and watch your language; this is a family restaurant. I’ll make sure all your drinks are free, and throw in free desserts for everyone. Just please keep calm. If you have any problems I’ll be happy to help.”

Husband: “The service has been s*** all night. I want all my meal for free! I shouldn’t have to pay for this s***!”

Manager: “I can’t promise that, but I’ll see what I can do.”

(The husband seems calmer, and he smiles as the waitress and the manager bustle off to get him new drinks and desserts. The wife is just steaming.)

Husband: “You wait; I’ll get our entire meal for free.”

(The wife just sits there fuming. Their poor kids just look unhappy because everyone in the restaurant is staring and muttering about their dad. The waitress comes over with drinks and very carefully sets them down. The husband says nothing. Then, the wife takes his soda with lots of ice in it and just tips it into his lap, very slowly. The poor waitress looks horrified, but everyone in the restaurant cheers.)

Wife: “Bring us the bill; we’ll pay for it all. I’m really sorry.”

(The wife reaches into her purse and hands the waitress a £20 note.)

Wife: “That’s for you. Hardly enough for putting up with his s*** all evening, but at least you only have to put up with it tonight. I’ve had to live with this a**hole for ten years now.”

(I’ve always hated creeps who go to a restaurant angling to get a free meal. It was nice to see one get his comeuppance. I just hope the wife divorced him. I know I would have.)

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We Don’t Sell Misogyny Cables

, , , , , | Right | July 19, 2018

(I work at a well-known electronics retailer that recently filed for bankruptcy. The customer base is primarily middle-aged men. I am a woman. Every day I have at least one conversation like this one:)

Me: *to male customer* “Hi, welcome to [Store]! How can I help you today?”

Customer: *condescendingly* “Oh, don’t worry about it, honey; I’ll wait until he’s free.” *gestures to my male boss, who hates it when people disrespect his employees*

Boss: “Oh, I’m going to be a while.”

(My boss sits at the desk and opens a magazine, very obviously ignoring the customer. The customer actually stands and stares at my boss for a few moments, waiting for him to finish.)

Boss: “Y’know, you can ask [My Name] if you need help. She does actually know what she’s doing.”

Customer: *huffing* “Fine.” *to me, very slowly and slightly louder than necessary* “I’m looking for a special kind of caaaaablllle—” *holds up his hands to indicate a cable* “—that will connect my laaaaptop to my TV.”

Me: “Sir, I am neither deaf nor mentally disabled. You’re looking for an HDMI cable. We have six-foot or nine-foot, and would you prefer blue or black?”

Customer: *startled* “Oh! Um, six-foot, black, please.”

Me: “Okay, that’ll be right over here with our LAN and Ethernet cables, next to the splitters. Here you are; is there anything else I can help you with today?”

Customer: *sheepish* “No, thank you. That’s all I needed.”

(I rang him up and he left. Only one of these kinds of customers ever actually apologized to me, but they all left fairly red-faced.)

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