The Crutch Of The Matter

, , , , , | Right | October 11, 2019

(I recently injured my ankle. Because I can’t walk, I’m stationed at the front with a chair to help greet customers and direct them to different departments.)

Me: “Hi! Welcome to [Store]. Can I help you find anything?”

Customer: “Yeah, I’m looking for buttons.”

Me: “Okay, they’ll be just past our quilting section down this aisle!”

Customer: “Can you show me?”

Me: “I can’t, but I can get someone here to walk you there!”

Customer: “Ugh, stupid millennials are so lazy.”

(The customer’s husband speaks up.)

Husband: “You know, I’m willing to bet those crutches leaning on the chair are hers.” 

(The customer went red and stormed off. I thanked her husband before he followed her.)

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Misremembering Mismanagement

, , , , , | Working | October 8, 2019

(It’s been a very slow week at work. My manager tells me to go ahead and take a specific day off, since they don’t expect it to be suddenly busy. That day, I’m at home and get a call from work.)

Manager: “[My Name], is everything okay?”

Me: “Uh, yeah, why?”

Manager: “You didn’t come in on time. Did you write down the wrong time?”

Me: “You told me not to worry about coming in today.”

Manager: “You know what? I did. Sorry about that! Have a great day!”

(She apologized when I came in for my next shift. At least she was worried instead of upset!)

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All’s Well That Games Well

, , , , , , | Working | October 3, 2019

(It’s been a slow week, and we haven’t made our sales goal. To try to minimize the loss, managers start picking people to go home early or miss shifts later in the week. I’m sitting with my manager one evening, discussing store things.)

Manager: “We’re barely halfway to our goal, and we’ve only got a few hours left. There’s no way we’re making sales.”

Me: “So, we cut hours again?”

Manager: “Yeah. Let’s see…”

Me: *dramatic sigh* “I’ll take one for the team and volunteer. It’s a hard decision but—”

Manager: “[My Name], you just want to go home and play video games.”

Me: “Absolutely.”

(She laughed and sent me home. I came in the next day to find out that a coworker single-handedly managed to get us to our sales goal in the last hour.)

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Unfiltered Story #160892

, , , | Unfiltered | August 23, 2019

I’m working late one night when the phone rings.
Me: “(Business Name), how can I help you?
Him: “Yeah i was just wondering if you have televisions there.”
Me: “Yes sir, we do.”
Him: “So could you tell me if you have Direct TV channel (x)?”
(The channel he asked for was a high number, probably something specific to that provider, and we generally don’t play cable but instead use Arabic servers for soccer games and music videos.)
Me, without hesitation: “I’m sorry sir but we do not.”
Him: *mumbles something, almost as if he’s yawning while talking to me*
Me: “Sir?”
Him, suddenly rude: “Well how could you possibly know you don’t have that channel without checking?”
Me: “Because sir, we don’t have Direct Tv.”
(He hung up on me.)

Unable To Kinect To Your Plan

, , , , , | Right | July 8, 2019

(I work at a local used video game store chain. Since we deal in every console, we receive a lot of cool things sometimes. However, it also brings a lot of questionable material. For instance, today a customer walks in and doesn’t even look at me.)

Customer: “Hey, man, I need 30 bucks for this unopened Kinect.”

Me: “Well, normally, I’d be happy to take it, but this location already has two of them and it has to be open. Also, I don’t really have any spare cash avail–“

(He cuts me off.)

Customer: *in a pitiful tone* “Dude, I’ll take 25; just please give me some money!”

(At this point I have no intention of dealing with this man, so I tell him we aren’t able to do it. He walks quickly back to the door, opens it, and shouts:)

Customer: “This place sucks; they never give me money!”

(He then exited the store and ran off. He forgot his Kinect. Upon closer inspection, the box was opened, and instead of a Kinect, it had a few DVDs and a PlayStation 2 controller.)

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