I Like Coffee, I Like Tea

, , , , | Right | October 11, 2018

(I’m the only one watching the coffee bar until the people actual scheduled to do it show up. I guess this could be split up into two stories, but they did only occur within ten minutes of each other. It’s a slow night, and [Customer #1] is the first customer I’ve seen at the coffee bar all evening.)

Customer #1: “May I get a green tea and a mint tea, please?”

Me: “You want two teas? What size?”

Customer #1: “I only want one cup. Two bags. What’s your smallest cup? ”

Me: *repeating the order because I’ve never had someone ask for two different teas like this* “So one 16 oz tea with an extra tea bag?”

Customer #1: “Yes.” *hands me her card*

Me: “Campus Meal Plan? ”

Customer #1: “Yeah, but why am I being charged extra?”

Me: “An extra tea bag is fifty cents. With the meal plan discount, your entire order is only 82 cents.”

Customer #1: “But all the other times they just ask me if I want a second bag.”

Me: “Then they need to start charging you for an extra tea bag. They’re not free.”

Customer #1: *rolls eyes* “Fine.”

(I run her card, and [Customer #1] takes her tea and leaves. Not five minutes later, my second customer shows up.)

Me: “What can I get for you? ”

Customer #2: “May I get an iced mocha? Go easy on the ice, please.”

(I run her card, and start making her drink. I fill the cup with about half the ice normally use for iced drinks.)

Me: *showing [Customer #2] the amount of ice in the cup* “You wanted light on the ice? Is this okay?:

Customer #2: “How light can you make it?”

Me: “You want less, then?”

Customer #2: “Put in as little ice as you can. No ice would be best.”

Me: “The espresso is brewed hot. If I don’t put any ice in it, it’s just going to be a hot cafe mocha, and not a cold drink”

Customer #2: “Yeah, actually could you make me a hot mocha instead? ”

(She seemed happy when I gave her the hot mocha.)

Who’s The Rudest Of Them All?

, , , , , | Right | October 10, 2018

I am sitting at a table in a coffee shop relaxing on a Sunday morning. It is very busy. A woman comes in and is talking to the person at the counter, and the barista evidently doesn’t hear her and asks her to repeat it. The woman becomes upset says, “No one else has a problem hearing me, EVER. EXCEPT the people who take my order at this coffee shop.” She then literally YELLS her order, “A… VENTI… MOCHA… LATTE… WITH… EXTRA… CHOCOLATE!!!” The barista ignores the customer’s angry attitude smiles, takes her money, and says, “Thanks.”

After a few minutes, the order is ready. Another employee is handing her the coffee and the customer yells, “I cannot stand coming here! You hire the RUDEST people in here.” The person handing her coffee happens to be the manager, who smiles sweetly and tells her, “That’s not true or you would work here.”

The customer looks daggers at the manager and I remember thinking, “This is NOT going to end well.”

Sure enough, as the customer turns around to walk the door, she tosses her cup on the floor and BOOM… all that chocolate, coffee, and milk ALL over the floor. She turns and looks at the staff and smiles and says in baby talk, “Oh, dear! I dwopped my coffee. Have fun cweaning it up.” She laughs like it is something hilarious to do and leaves.

Getting An Icy Reception

, , , , , , | Working | March 28, 2018

(I am a huge coffee drinker. I only like hot coffee; I can’t stand the iced stuff. Even in triple-digit weather, I will drink hot coffee. I travel a great deal and always have trouble with the person taking my order giving me iced coffee, even AFTER telling them to make sure it’s hot. They tell me they thought I just misspoke, because there was no way someone would want a hot drink in the middle of summer. Usually they just remake it and apologize, I tell them it’s no problem and that it was an honest mistake, and I go about my merry way. I am at a hospital taking care of a relative. I go down to a fast food restaurant to get a much-needed coffee.)

Me: “Good afternoon. May I please have a hot mocha coffee, medium.”

Cashier: “Okay, that is one coffee… Are you sure you want hot?”

Me: “Yes. Please make sure it is hot. I do not like iced.”

Cashier: “Um, it’s over 100 degrees.”

Me: “Yes, I know. I want hot, not iced, please. I think the iced coffee is nasty.”

Cashier: “Okay.”

(I go and wait for my order. I wait about ten minutes. People come in to order after me and leave with their orders. I go up and talk to who I believe is the manager.)

Me: “Excuse me. I have been waiting for ten minutes for my coffee order.”

Manager: “Oh, here it is, ma’am, on the counter.” *gestures to an iced coffee*

Me: *sigh* “No, I ordered a hot coffee. I said it three times.”

Manager: “It’s over 100 degrees out . Nobody orders hot coffee on hot days like this.”

Me: “I do.”

Manager: “Tell you what. This drink is more expensive than what you ordered; you can have this one, instead, without paying more.” *he tries to walk off*

Me: “No. I do not want iced coffee; I think it is nasty. I ordered hot coffee and that is what I want, please.”

(At this point the original cashier comes over. She just shakes her head.)

Cashier: “I told you to make sure it was hot.”

Manager: “Who orders hot coffee when it’s 100 degrees out?”

Me: “I do. Now, please, either make my coffee the way I ordered it, or you can give me a refund. I really am done arguing.”

(He just stands there. The cashier goes around him and makes my coffee. I thank her, but as I start to leave, the manager tells me in a bit of a snotty tone I should take the iced coffee, too, because it would just go to waste.)

Me: “I. Do. Not. Want. Iced. Coffee. Seriously, what part of that do you not get?”

(As I am leaving, I hear him telling the cashier:)

Manager: “I don’t see why she wouldn’t just take the coffee we already made. It’s better than the hot stuff she is drinking.”

(Unfortunately for him, my receipt had a “How are we doing?” survey code on it.)


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Someone Else Needs That Coffee

, , , | Working | March 27, 2018

Me: “[Combo] with a medium black coffee, please.”

Cashier: “Would you like cream and sugar in that?”

Me: *long pause* “No.”

Not The Flavor Of The Month

, , , , , | Working | December 30, 2017

(My mother’s boss visited the headquarters of a famous coffee brand in Switzerland for her work, and while there was given a flavour that she never tried before and really liked. She is also a regular at a [Coffee Brand] store in Paris and has a regular order there. This happens after she goes back to that store.)

Boss: “Hi, I’m here for my regular order, but would like to change it. I’d like to add some decaf and [flavour].”

Salesperson: “They haven’t had [flavour] since before I was born.”

Boss: “Can we please check on your computer?”

(The computer is checked by an older employee, who doesn’t find the flavour and insists it has been discontinued as well.)

Boss: “That’s strange, because I was talking with [Coffee Brand’s Vice-President] a few days ago, and he gave me [flavour].”

(Only after that did the older employee admit that [flavour] was actually a new flavour that hadn’t made it to the Paris store yet. They gave her free chocolates as an apology.)

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