I work at a coffee and pastry place.

Customer: “I want three vanilla Danishes!”

I charge him for them and hand him the receipt, no problem. Then, he decides to change his mind.

Customer: “Actually, I want the raisin Danishes!” 

It’s annoying, but the other Danish is the same price, so it’s no big deal.

Me: “Is it okay to put the Danishes all together in one bag?”

Customer: “Sure.”

I get what he wants, and I show him the bag to make sure I have the order right.

Customer: *Waving his receipt* “What is this?! That’s not what I paid for! I wanted vanilla Danishes!”

Okay, so now he wants the original item he was charged for, even though he told me to change it.

Customer: “What kind of bag is this?! Put them in a better one!”

Why wouldn’t you tell me that before when I showed you the bag I was going to use?

Customer: “You can’t stack the Danishes on top of each other like that! It’s bad presentation!”

He is right on that one, but he did say it was okay to put them in one bag. 

At this point, I assume everything will finally be right, but of course, it isn’t.

Customer: “You shouldn’t put these in a bag; it’s better in a box.”

There are other people waiting behind this guy, and luckily, I finally get everything “right”, so I apologize before he leaves.

Customer: “No, it’s okay. You don’t have to apologize. It’s just so you know for next time.”

That day, I learned that when a customer says they want their pastries in the bag you showed them, they actually mean that they want a box, and if they change their mind, you should ignore them and give them what they originally paid for.

Customer: “What’s the difference between a latte and a cappuccino?”

I explain what each is.

Customer: “Okay, I want a cappuccino.”

Knowing the common complaint from those who drink cappuccinos for the first time, I emphasize:

Me: “Of course! It will feel really light in the cup since it’s half milk and half foam. Just making sure that’s what you want?”

Customer: “Yes!”

I make it, call it out, and figure my interaction with her is over. Nope. She lifts the cup and immediately asks:

Customer: “What is this?!”

Me: “That’s your cappuccino.”

Customer: *Yelling* “You’re ripping me off. You’ve made this wrong! I want a refund!”

My coworker also explained that the cappuccino was made correctly and it was what she ordered, but she refused to believe us. I had to refund her, and she left without a drink.

Related:
Cappuccino-No-No, Part 8
Cappuccino-No-No, Part 7
Cappuccino-No-No, Part 6
Cappuccino-No-No, Part 5
Cappuccino-No-No, Part 4

I work in a newly-opened US chain of coffee shops in a relatively rural part of southern England. As a result, it’s been the talk of the relatively small town, but overall, the response has been positive.

A few months after opening, I see a little old lady wander into the shop looking a combination of confused and overwhelmed. I’ve seen that look before, so I gently ask her:

Me: “Is everything okay, madam?”

Customer: “Oh, I’m fine. But, you see, I am meeting my daughter in town, and she said to come here.”

Me: “That’s great! Did you want to order something now or wait for her?”

Customer: “Oh, well, I’m a little early, you see. I’m always early, old habit. I wanted to get us some tea before she got here, but… well…”

I see her glance at the menu.

Me: “I understand, madam; we do offer a lot of teas! Did you know what you wanted to order?”

Customer: “Oh, just a regular old-fashioned tea for me, thank you. Milk, no sugar. But it’s my daughter… I asked her what she wanted, and I scribbled it down, and…”

She hands me a scrunched-up piece of paper. Written on there is something that can only be described as the last written words of a dead alien civilisation. It doesn’t even look like language, let alone English.

Me: “I’m having a little trouble reading your handwriting, madam.”

Customer: “Yes, my penmanship isn’t what it used to be.”

Me: “Can you remember the name of the drink?”

Customer: “No, that’s why I wrote it down.”

Another customer is standing nearby and takes a quick glance at the piece of paper.

Other Customer: “That says caffe macchiato.”

Customer: “Yes, that sounds like what she asked for!”

I thank both and ring up the old lady. As I am serving the other customer:

Me: “Thank goodness you were here. How did you make sense of that handwriting?”

Other Customer: “I’m a nurse.”

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One of our regulars makes it a point to always get soy milk for their coffee as they’re lactose intolerant. They tell us this EVERY time they order. They’re also an impatient a**hole who thinks the whole world revolves around them.

The regular is waiting for their strong soy latte when I call out another customer’s drink.

Me: “Strong latte for—”

Regular: “Finally!”

The regular grabs the drink and storms out of the store muttering about how it took too long to make the drink. I call over the customer the drink was originally intended for.

Me: “Sorry, that was your drink. The strong latte with regular whole milk, right?”

Customer: “Yeah, that was mine.”

Me: “Yeah, we’ll get that remade for you.”

I then call over my manager.

Me: “Just a heads-up, you’ll be getting a complaint called in from you-know-who later on today.”

Manager: “Oh, man, what is it this time?”

Me: “They’re about to have a s***ty morning. Literally.”

A man comes through the drive-thru, bypassing the menu and the speaker that you order from. A little confused, I open the window.

Customer: “Two green tea lattes.”

I steam the milk perfectly, add the matcha green tea powder, stir it up, and walk to the window with the drinks. He looks at me, and I can already see the rage building.

Customer: “I wanted these cold!“

Me: *Politely* “That’s not a problem; I’ll make those over for you.”

I make him two iced green tea lattes, and they’re made even more quickly than the first two drinks. I hand him the new drinks. I can practically see steam coming out of his ears, and it looks like he’s ready to jump out of his car and fight me.

Customer: “This is the wrong drink! Again! I want it with crushed ice!”

We don’t have crushed ice; he clearly wants a Frappuccino.

Me: *Somehow calmly* “Sir, you ordered a latte, which is just ice, milk, and green tea, and a Frappuccino is the blended drink that you want. It’s no problem making it again for you.”

Customer: “ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT I ORDERED THE WRONG DRINK?”

Me: “Yes, but it’s okay; it’s a very common mistake. Just so you know for the future, you should probably order a Frappuccino.”

The guy looked at me like I was f****** with him. I shrugged my shoulders and made him his drinks, and he drove away, silently fuming. The guy wound up being in the drive-thru for about ten minutes, which in drive-thru time equates to roughly six years.