Vis A Visa

| Canada | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Funny Names

(I am the tired and barely attentive customer in this story.)

Employee: “How can I help you today?”

(I proceed to order my coffee.)

Employee: “And what name should I put on the cup?”

Me: “Oh. Uh, Visa.”

(The employee dutifully writes Visa on the cup without another question.)

Employee: “And how will you be paying today?”

Me: “Oh… Yeah… Visa.”

(Apparently I needed that coffee more badly than I realized.)

Not Quite The Cream Of The Crop

| Hillsboro, OR, USA | Bizarre, Food & Drink

(I’m in line when I hear the drive-thru employees talking about a customer in the drive-thru. She wanted iced coffee, but she wanted it to not be brown.)

Employee #1: “So she doesn’t want coffee?”

Employee #2: “No, she wants coffee, just doesn’t want it to be brown.”

Employee #1: “So more cream?”

Employee #2: “No… she wants light cream, just… doesn’t want it to be brown.”

Failed The Name Game

| TAS, Australia | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers

(The coffee shop I work in has loyalty cards that we can scan, which will come up with the customer’s name on the screen. On this particular day, an elderly man in his mid-60s comes in to buy a coffee and then gives me his loyalty card to scan. After I’ve scanned it, I look at the name on the screen…)

Me: “Sir, are you sure this is your card?”

Customer: “Absolutely, why?”

Me: “Well, you just don’t look like a Penelope to me.”