I work in a clothing store. On January 1, we start a $40,000 remodel to give our store a much-needed facelift. We are still open for business during the remodel.

On January 20, the remodel is complete. On January 21, a customer complains about the position of our registers because now the sun is in her eyes when she checks out at a certain time of day.

Corporate leaps into action and tells us they’re going to tint our windows so this won’t happen again.

On August 31, workers from corporate show up to tint our windows. They work all night to finish before we open.

On September 1, the security chief comes in and throws a complete fit because the tinted windows are too dark and now they won’t be able to see in and make sure we aren’t on fire, getting robbed, etc.

On September 2, workers from corporate show up to un-tint our windows. They work all night to finish before we open.

On September 3, a customer complains about the position of our registers because now the sun is in her eyes when she checks out at a certain time of day.

There is definitely a pattern developing here…

A lady comes in with a pair of shoes to return. I’m still pretty new at the job.

Customer: “Hi, I’d like to return these shoes.”

I recognize the box as one of our shoeboxes but she approaches us at the folding table. Nevertheless, I try to help her.

Me: “Okay, was there something wrong with them?”

Customer: “No, I just want a different pair for my son.”

I open the box to see a pair of shoes I’ve never seen before, but they are the style we sell.

Me: “Well, I’m still pretty new here and I’m not 100% sure of our return and exchange policy, so I can’t guarantee that we can exchange these for you.”

Customer: “What?! But I called your corporation on the phone this morning before I came in and they said I could!”

Me: “Oh, well, if they said that you can, then you should have no problem. One of our sales associates in the back can help you get the shoes you want.”

My coworker and I went about our shift as normal, and then one of my managers approached us. She explained our return and exchange policy to us and then told me that the customer tried to tell her that I had practically forbidden her from trying to return the shoes. Luckily, my coworker had seen the whole thing and vouched for me, and my manager knew that I wouldn’t have made any decisions without asking her about it. But apparently, she had tried to get me fired because I was new and didn’t know our exchange policy.

We sell and rent formalwear for men, like tuxedos.

Customer: *Over the phone* “What time do you close today?”

Me: “It’s a Sunday, so we close early. What time are you thinking of coming in?”

Customer: “I was going for like nine?”

Me: “Ma’am, that’s very late.”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: “We’ll be closed before then.”

Customer: “Can I just order over the phone and you can have stuff out for me before I get in, then? I am on a schedule.”

Me: “Ma’am, we can’t do that.”

Customer: “But you have to! I don’t know if you know this, but I’m the groom’s step-mom and I have to look nice!”

Me: “Do you need a dress?”

Customer: “Yes! What do you think I’m calling here for?!”

Me: “Ma’am, this is [Formalwear Store]. We don’t sell dresses.”

Customer: *Silence* “Then why the f*** did you call me?!” *Hangs up*

I have just started working here and don’t know where everything is yet. I am memorizing product locations when a customer comes up to me with one of our hoodies.

Me: “Hi! Are you finding everything okay?”

Customer: “What? Yeah, but this hoodie is racist and I want you to take it down.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “IT’S RACIST! AND SO IS THIS STORE!”

The hoodie is a nerd design wearing an Indian headdress.

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but I can’t take that down without my manager’s permission.”

Customer: “Then go get them.”

I do so, and the manager comes out. From what I can hear, the customer wants to take down all the hoodies or she will sue.

We ended up not taking them down for obvious reasons, and she came back frequently to complain. Eventually, we had to ban her from the store because she got violent and started stealing any merchandise she deemed racist.

My boyfriend has proposed to me. Due to our having lived together for a while and knowing we’re ready, we see no reason for a long engagement and want to get married. I want a blue wedding dress.

I visit a bridal shop and speak with an assistant.

Assistant: “In this year, the bridal colors, other than white, are cream, brown, and red. Maybe you can have blue next year.”

Me: “But I’m getting married this year.”

Assistant: “Why?”

Me: “Because he proposed!”

Assistant: “Well, you should have done your research first and told him to propose in a proper year.”

Me: “…”