Your Top And Bottom Priorities Are Reversed

, , , | Right | March 2, 2021

Customer: “Excuse me, I was in your [Location] branch and there was a pair of trousers.”

They describe the trousers.

Me: “Yes, I know the ones you’re looking for. What size do you need? I’ll fetch them for you.”

Customer: “No, I don’t need the trousers, but in [Location], they were right next to a really nice top.”

Me: “So, you’re looking for the top? Can you describe that to me?”

Customer: “Yes, it was next to the trousers I just described.”

Come on… How much can you really want a top that you can’t even describe?!

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Steal Or Swim

, , , | Right | March 1, 2021

My mom and I own a small clothing store. We sell high-end branded swimsuits. Two ladies want to see and try on the swimwear. They try on everything and do not buy anything.

Customer #1: “I didn’t see anything that I like here.”

I notice the neck strings of one of our swimsuits still tied around her neck under her clothes.

Me: “Do you mind giving me back all of the suits so that I can put them back on the racks?”

She does bring back all of them; I count both tops and bottoms before they leave.

Customer #2: “I think that we’ll go to [Big Box Store] and buy one.”

Me: *Thinking* “And you just tried to steal a $75 swimsuit from us?”

I told my mom about what they tried to do and she said that they were not welcome back.

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Big Mistake! Big! Huge!

, , , , , , , | Working | February 26, 2021

My well-to-do aunt has ended up in the hospital. I’m the only family member who lives in the same city as her, so I step in to help her in every way I can. She has given me $500 to buy anything she needs, so I’m in a high-end clothing store holding a pair of men’s pyjamas pants — the only thing that will fit over the cast she has on her foot.

There is a man at the counter being served with a very complicated order. The woman helping him has to open a mountain of packages individually and scan the contents. Another man is standing in line and a woman comes off the floor to help him. He pays quickly and leaves, but so does the woman who helped him. I had taken his spot next in line, and it’s late at night so the man at the counter and I are the only two customers in the store, so it’s obvious that I’m ready to pay and go.

The floor woman floats back and forth from the floor to behind the counter, very careful to not make eye contact with me. I wait for far too long, and the sixth time she goes behind the counter and walks away again, I drop the pyjamas, making her look over at the sudden movement. When she looks over at me, I scoop up my planned purchase, lock eyes with her, and take two big steps to stand in front of the counter where she’d helped the other man.

With a rather discreet eye roll, she steps back behind the counter and takes the pants to scan them, but I walk away — past the first woman still working on the complicated order, who looks so apologetic, even though none of the events were her fault.

I go across the road to a lower-end store and buy a similar pair, pulling off the tagging and “losing” the receipt so my aunt doesn’t know it is a cheaper brand.

To be honest, I came from work, so I wasn’t dressed to the level that might be expected in that store, but I make some decent cash myself and have been known to shop there for my needs. I find it amusing to Pretty Woman them sometimes, standing in jeans and a band shirt and dropping $5,000 for some stuff I want, but I was stressed with my aunt’s injuries and wasn’t going to put up with their attitude this time.

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A Stupid Call By Any Metric, Part 3

, , , | Right | February 18, 2021

We have a live chat message come through from America with the following question.

Customer: “Hi, I’m a size thirty-six-inch waist… but that’s US size. Can you tell me what size in English inches I need?”

A Stupid Call By Any Metric, Part 2
A Stupid Call By Any Metric

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This Is A Robbery, If That’s Okay With You?

, , , , | Right | February 17, 2021

I work at a ladies plus-size clothing retailer. A man suddenly runs up behind my counter.

Man: “Where’s your till?”

Me: “I’m sorry, what?”

Man: “Where’s your till? Gimme your money!”

I’m slowly approaching but I’m too derp to register what’s happening.

Me: “My till? But we’ve not made any money today.”

Man: “Oh… Well, really?”

I’m beginning to realise what’s happening.

Me: “Er, yup, bad day for sales today.”

Man: “Oh, but it’s my hood.”

Me: “Yup… still, no money. Sorry.”

Man: “Oh, all right, sis. I’ll let you off this time.”

He fist-bumps me.

Man: “What about this week? Any sales?”

Me: “Yup, but that money’s already in the bank.”

Man: *Nodding sympathetically* “Oh, yeah, rent’s not cheap these days.”

He looks up.

Man: “I like that dress for my mum… How much?”

I tell him the price, and he enquires about the price of four more dresses. Finally, he’s walking out the door.

Man: “All right, sis, I’ll let you off this time. Bye!” 

Me: “Bye!”

I dove on the phone to call security!

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