This Employee Needs To Be Socked

| UK | Working | September 4, 2013

(I purchase a pack of underwear, but after one wash they are falling apart at the seams. I return them to the customer service counter, along with the receipt to prove I had bought them less than a week ago.)

Cashier: “We don’t take returns on underwear.”

Me: “I know, but these are faulty. They fell apart after one wash and I’d like a refund.”

Cashier: *pushing the pack back at me* “We don’t do refunds on underwear.”

(I open the pack and show the cashier the underwear, which is obviously unraveling at the seams.)

Me: “I’m not returning them because I changed my mind. They are faulty.”

Cashier: *annoyed* “We DON’T do refunds on UNDERWEAR!”

Me: “Look, I know store policy is not to do returns on underwear, but I’m still entitled to return faulty goods. These are faulty, and under the Sale of Goods Act, I’m entitled to a refund. If you can’t do it, call a supervisor.”

Cashier: *rolling eyes and glaring at me* “Hey! [Manager], I got a return on underwear.”

Manager: “We don’t do returns on underwear.”

Me: *showing him the falling-apart seams* “I know, but these are faulty.”

Manager: “Oh! Sorry about that; [cashier] will process the refund for you.”

Cashier: “But we don’t do returns on underwear!”

Manager: “We do if the merchandise is faulty.”

Cashier: “But we don’t DO returns on underwear!”

Manager: *to me* “Sorry about this. Come over here; I’ll process your refund. [Cashier], I will see you in a minute.”

(The manager gives me the refund while apologizing for the cashier. As I walked out he is talking to her, and I could still hear her arguing ‘but we don’t do refunds on underwear!’)

This Coworker Needs To Be Socked

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Way Under-Branded

| Regina, SK, Canada | Right | August 27, 2013

(My clothing store has just sent out an email announcing ‘Winter Sale Underway!’ )

Me: “Hello [store], how can I help you?”

Caller: “Hi, I was wondering if you have any ‘Underway?'”

Me: “Pardon?”

Caller: “Do you have any ‘Underway?'”

Me: “Do you mean underwear?”

Caller: “No! ‘Underway!’ It’s a brand, and it’s supposed to be on sale!”

Me: “Sorry, ma’am, I’m not familiar with that brand.”

Caller: “God! You’re useless! Get me someone who knows what ‘Underway’ is!”

(I hand the phone off to the manager, who goes through the same conversation.)

Manager: “Ma’am, ‘Winter Sale Underway’ means that a winter sale is coming. ‘Underway’ isn’t a brand.”

Customer: *hangs up*

(We still don’t know if the customer came for the sale.)

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Acting Out Of Line

| NH, USA | Right | August 15, 2013

(I am at a chain clothing store at the mall with my younger brother. A Hispanic family is being rung up in front of us, in the only open line. Another customer goes to the other end of the counter where nobody is working.)

Customer: “I’d like to exchange these shirts. I bought two XLs, and my girlfriend thinks they’re too big on me.”

Cashier: “Okay, sir, I’ll be with you shortly.”

Customer: “And I need to return these shoes. Can I return everything at the shoe department?”

Cashier: “No, sir, they can only take care of shoes in that department.”

(At this point the customer’s phone starts ringing, and he answers it. He starts moaning about his day to the person on the other end, occasionally burping and scratching himself.)

Customer: “Yeah, I’m here right now, but I’m stuck waiting because of these d*** Puerto Ricans who are trying to get 10% off on a f****** $10 purchase.”

(The teenage cashier finishes ringing up the family, and since my brother is next in line, the cashier starts ringing him up.)

Customer: “Hey! Why aren’t you waiting on me?!”

Younger Brother: “I don’t know if you noticed, but there’s a LINE.”

Customer: “Well, I started a new line. I’ve got places to go. I’m a rolling stone.”

(Yes, he actually says “rolling stone.” My brother finishes, and I’m next in line so the cashier starts ringing me up.)

Customer: “Un-f******-believable!”

Me: “You know what? Maybe if you weren’t such an impatient, loudmouth, racist, a**-hole and actually got in line, you might just actually get rung up!”

(The customer throws his stuff across the counter, even the stuff he is returning, and storms off.)

Cashier: “Sorry about that.”

Younger Brother: “No worries. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Me: “I’m a retail manager myself, and I was actually quite impressed with how cool headed you stayed dealing with that guy. Very nicely done!”

In Line And Out Of Line

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Unfashionably Late

| MD, USA | Right | July 22, 2013

(My store offers fashion shows. It’s the day before an event, and I’m making last minute arrangements when I get paged that someone is there to talk about the show.)

Customer: “I’d like to schedule a fashion show with you guys to support my women’s club.”

Me: “Of course! Let me explain to you quickly what we’ll do for you.”

(I give her a quick rundown of the fashion show program, and what we offer, but she’s tapping her foot and looking at her watch.)

Customer: “I’m REALLY in a rush here; can we hurry it up?”

Me: “Sure! Tell you what, all the information you need is in this packet, and there’s the contracts I will need you to sign. Why don’t you return those to me when you’re able, and we’ll work out a date that isn’t taken?”

Customer: “A date that isn’t taken? I need it NOW!”

Me: “Now?”

Customer: “The event starts in an hour; I just need you to bring the stuff.”

Me: “Ma’am… I schedule fashion shows six months out.”

Customer: “What? You mean that you won’t do it?”

Me: “On this short notice? No.”

Customer: “But I’ve been advertising this for months! We’ve sold over 100 tickets! We have themed the whole event around it!”

Me: “Wait, so you printed invitations and got decorations, but didn’t talk to me until now?”

Customer: “Oh, just grab your models! I don’t have time for this.”

Me: “I don’t just keep the models in the back room!”

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There’s An In-Seam Lining To Every Cloud

| Brandon, FL, USA | Working | July 22, 2013

(A salesperson is trying to convince me to buy a pair of jeans.)

Salesperson: “These are the most comfortable jeans you’ll ever wear! They’re like wearing baby clouds.”

Me: *points to different pair* “Those look cool.”

Salesperson: “They’re very cool, but they’re not BABY CLOUDS!”

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