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A collection of client horror stories from designers and freelancers on CFH.

This Is How You Make A Web Designer Scream

, , , | Right | January 25, 2022

I’m creating a new design for a client’s website. After the third round of changes, the client is happy and approves our new design. We code it and send the URL over for approval before launching.

Client: “Hmm. Looks all right. But could you try the logo a bit smaller and in the center?”

Me: “Sure, like this?”

Client: “Yeah, no, that didn’t look as good as I thought. Change it back. And could you try the sidebar in darker purple?”

Me: “Sure, like this?”

Client: “Yeah, like that! But now the content boxes look a bit bleak. Could you make them stand out more?”

And so on. This goes on for about seven rounds of editing (and about seven times I manage to talk them out of something). We get closer and closer to the original, until:

Me: “Look, you approved the design. Any changes are heaps easier to do in Photoshop than on the actual site with code. What are we doing here?”

Client: “Oh, sorry. I’m used to working this way. By the way, I talked to our AD and he had some good points. I’ll send them over.”

I receive a PowerPoint that’s similar to our first design but requires fresh coding and work. The back and forth occurs five more times.

Me: “All right. Like that?”

Client: “Yeah, that’s good enough, I guess. But we decided to postpone the launch until after summer, so just save it somewhere and we’ll pick this up in August or something. I trust you won’t invoice us since you haven’t delivered anything yet.”

You’re Not Dissuading People Of Their Native Opinions Here

, , , | Right | January 24, 2022

I’m meeting with a client for the first time to discuss a project.

Client: “So, are you—” *whispers* “—Native American?”

Me: “Yes.”

Client: “Wow, what percentage?”

Me: “100%.”

Client: “Wow. So, does that mean both of your parents were—” *whispers* “—Natives? Wow. What tribe?”

Me: “Navajo.”

Client: “Hmm, I’ve never heard of them. Is that like Cherokee or Muckleshoot?”

Me: “Navajo, as in the code-talkers of World War II. Ever heard of them?”

Client: “No. Weird. I’m really interested in this because I do Native American things, too. Everyone just thinks I’m stoned.”

The client then stood up and walked away. We never even got to discuss the project.

Maybe You Should’ve Just Hired A Model

, , | Right | January 23, 2022

Client: “Hey, can you retouch photos? I’ve got my album cover photo, but it needs some minor touch-ups. Zits and stuff.”

Me: “Sure, let me take a look.”

Client: “So, just remove that blemish on my nose and the zit on my forehead.”

Me: “No problem.”

Client: “Also, I forgot to shave, so take care of my stubble.”

Me: “Stubble’s not the easiest thing to remove—”

Client: “Ah, well, my sideburns and hairstyle could use some help, too.”

Me: “Well—”

Client: “And how do you think I’d look with sunglasses and different clothes? You know, this is getting ridiculous. Just let me see some options.”

Don’t Tell This Client About Joseph’s Coat

, , , , | Right | January 22, 2022

I am helping a client with a design.

Client: “I don’t know… I don’t like the blue and white together.”

Me: “What’s the problem with the colors?”

Client: “It looks Argentinean.”

Me: “So?”

Client: “The new Pope is Argentinean and we are not a religious firm. So, please, change all the colors.”

Don’t You Speak Asian?, Part 6

, , , | Right | January 21, 2022

I was working as a producer for a client who brought in a pool of actors they wanted to use in an upcoming production.

Me: “I noticed you have some Asian talent in the headshots you sent us. Do you know what ethnicity they are?”

Client: “I think this one is Japanese, this one, I think, is Cambodian, and this girl may be Korean.”

Me: “Do any of them speak their native language?”

Client: “I think they all speak a little Asian, yeah.”

Don’t You Speak Asian?, Part 5
Don’t You Speak Asian?, Part 4
Don’t You Speak Asian?, Part 3
Don’t You Speak Asian?, Part 2
Don’t You Speak Asian?