I’m part of a team that developed an iPad app for our client. When it came to testing, we had a meeting with the client where he tested the app while we watched. The navigation of the app involved sliding across the screen to move between content. After some rigorous testing, the client gave his approval, and everyone left the meeting happy.

Minutes later, we got a panicked call from the client.

Client: “I got back to my office, and the main display looks all blurry and wrong now.”

Since I was still in the building, I went to see what the issue was.

Client: “Look, this is unacceptable. I was all ready to go live, and mistakes like this are wasting what little time we have.”

Luckily, I understood the problem immediately. I quickly wiped away the smudges caused by the client swiping his fingers on the screen.

Client: “Oh… my mistake.”

Me: “Here is a proof of that ten-inch-by-ten-inch sticker.”

Client: “Is that ten inches wide, ten inches high, and/or ten inches deep?”

Me: “For a sticker?”

Client: “Yeah.”

Me: “Width by height.”

Client: “Are you sure?”

Me: “Positive.”

Early in my career as a graphic designer, I was hired by a museum to do a poster for their upcoming exhibition. I came up with two versions. One had a black background with a white headline, and the other one was the inverse: a white background with the type in black.

Client: “I like how the white text stands out from the dark background in this version, but the white background in the other version is so much friendlier. Couldn’t you combine that background with that text?”

The moment those words had left his mouth, he seemed to realize that white type on a white background wouldn’t be an ideal solution.

For the final component of a branding campaign, I was designing an email marketing piece to announce the launch of the website.

Client: “The design looks great! But we want the call to action to really stand out, so bold and underline this line of text, then this one, and finally, this one.”

Me: “Those three lines of text are the only thing in the entire copy.”

Client: “We think that this will make it really clear which one is most important.”

Me: “By bolding and underlining everything?”

Client: “Yeah. What aren’t you getting here?”

Client: “Hi! I’d like to commission you for some artwork.”

Me: “Can you give me a brief?”

Client: “I’d like it to include a hundred people, all different ages and races, genders, and sizes, all eating my product and looking like it’s delicious.”

Me: “Well, that’s quite ambitious but certainly doable. Did you have any styles in mind that—”

Client: “Oh, just do it for me in all the styles, and I’ll pick the one I like.”

Me: “Uh… what do you mean by ‘all the styles’?”

Client: “When you type my request into your AI thingy, just get it to pump out all the styles.”

Me: “I’m an artist, and I create the art myself. I use some digital artistic tools, yes, but I don’t touch AI, and I don’t think any self-respecting artist would.”

Client: “But… why would you do it all by hand when a computer can do it for you?”

Me: “Because AI is not the tool you’d use to create a polished final product. At this point, I feel that I need to inform you that if you are looking for a cheap and quick job that uses AI, I am not the person for you. I charge [base rate] for a rough draft and then [final rate] for the final product.”

Client: “Wait… You’re expecting to be paid?!“

Me: “Take care, and have a nice day…”