Me: “Here are the photographs from the shoot yesterday.”
Client: “Nice shots; I like this one from behind the man. Can you just flip the image so we can see his face and not the back of his head?”
Me: “You want me to turn him around in the photograph so you can see his face?”
Client: “Yes, and maybe we can make him black. Do you have Photoshop?”
After giving a client his requested site design, he made it clear he wasn’t pleased.
Me: “But that’s what you asked for…”
Client: “Yeah, but I meant that figuratively.”
Me: “So you don’t want it to look like this?”
Client: “No, I do. Just think of the site design as a metaphor of a real website.”
Me: “…What?!”
Client: “The text is not black enough.”
Me: “It is set as ‘Black’ in the style sheet…”
Client: “Okay, but can you make it blacker than that black?”
Me: “Hold on, I’ll try something. Give me an hour.”
I go to lunch.
Me: “Okay, can you refresh your browser now?”
Client: “Yes, that’s better, thanks.”
Client: “We would like to get notifications for unplanned outages 3-4 days in advance.”
Client: “I do have the logo on a Mac Disk, will that help?”
Me: “Please email the logo.”
Client: “The trouble is we don’t have any Macs, and our PCs don’t even accept floppies. How about I mail it to you?”
Me: “Are you saying the logo is on a 3.5″ floppy disk?!”
Client: “I’ll have to double-check.”
A few minutes of waiting.
Client: “The floppy disk measures 3.5 inches, yes.”
Clients From Hell
