Picked Fresh From The M&M Tree

, , , , , | Right | July 18, 2018

(A customer comes through my line with a young child. I just started the order and she hands me two boxes of fruit snack variety packs.)

Customer: “I don’t want these. They say, ‘No artificial flavors,’ and I thought that meant no artificial colors. That’s kind of a weird thing to put on a box.”

Me: “Well, not really.”

Customer: *handing me a bag of M&Ms* “Can you scan these real quick? They’re open.”

Me: “…”

(She had another large bag of M&M Minis in her order. I guess she thinks they come in those colors naturally?)

Refunder Blunder, Part 38

, , , , , | Right | July 11, 2018

(I work in a call center for an online, high-end store. Mostly, I help customers with their online orders and returns. We work with another company that provides 50% discounts to their members for use on our website. The following call takes place with a customer who used the 50% discount towards a product but then returned it, so he was refunded for the discounted amount that he paid.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. My name is [My Name]; how may I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I’m looking for the status of my refund.”

Me: “I would be happy to check on that for you. Can you please provide me with the order number from which items were returned?”

(The customer gives me his information, I pull up his order and see that the refund was already processed, so I begin to give him the information.)

Me: “Okay, sir, looks like your refund was processed on November 14—” *which is about five months ago from the time of call* “—in the amount of $100.00. Would you like the confirmation number for your records?”

Customer: “Why is it only $100? The product I purchased cost $200!”

Me: “Yes, sir, but you used a 50% discount, so you only paid $100.”

Customer: “No, I want the full amount back!”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we cannot refund you more money than what you actually paid.”

(The customer’s wife takes the phone from the customer and begins yelling at me.)

Customers Wife: “That’s not fair! We deserve the full amount!”

Me: “Ma’am, while it is true that the item was originally listed for $200, you used a discount and only paid $100 for the product. We’ve refunded you the full amount that you paid. We cannot give you back more than what you paid for the product.”

(The husband then takes the phone back.)

Customer: “Shut up!”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “You keep repeating the same stupid thing over and over again. Just give us back our money!”

Me: “Sir, I’m not sure how much clearer I can make this. We have already refunded you all of the money you paid to us in November. We cannot give you more money than what you paid. There is nothing more I can do for you regarding this matter.”

Customer: “I don’t accept that!”

(This goes back and forth for literally another twenty minutes, with me explaining what I think is common sense in every different way that I can, while the customer and his wife continually interrupt me.)

Customer’s Wife: “Well, that’s just not fair! Your refund policy states I have 90 days to return the item! It says so right here on my receipt!!”

Me: “Yes? And you did return the item. And then we refunded you in full. But that doesn’t change the fact that we can’t just give you an extra $100 for nothing, when you only paid $100 to begin with and we already refunded you that amount. We can’t give you more money than you initially gave to us.”

Customer: “Fine. If you can’t help me, then I want your manager! And I’ll never order from you again!

Me: “…” *transfers customer and then immediately puts myself in break status to go physically hide from the stupidity*

Related:
Refunder Blunder, Part 37
Refunder Blunder, Part 36
Refunder Blunder, Part 35

The Apple Of Discord

, , , , | Right | June 20, 2018

(It is now half an hour after closing, and my last table has finished their meals. While I’d like nothing more than to drop the check and go home, my professional server instincts force me to continue the proper steps of service.)

Me: “Would you like to see our dessert selections this evening?”

Customer: “I would. Do you have carrot cake?”

Me: “No, I’m sorry. We do not.”

(I whisk away and return with the dessert tray and menus, rattling off the cheesecakes, crème brulee, lava and chocolate cakes, etc., and their descriptions.)

Customer: “Do you have an apple crisp of some sort?”

Me: *having not spoke of anything remotely apple* “No… Just the desserts on the tray.”

Customer: “Okay. Just a crème brulee, then!”

No Trend Towards Blend

, , , , , | Working | April 20, 2018

(My husband and I decide to try a new independent coffee shop that everyone keeps talking about. It is a hot summer day, and I usually don’t order blended coffee drinks, but the shop has a large selection that sound good and a sign advertising them as a great way to cool down in the heat and humidity. It is around one in the afternoon, so it’s not right after opening and not anywhere near closing, and the shop isn’t busy.)

Barista: “Hi, welcome to [Coffee Shop]. What can I get started for you? Our blended drinks are great for this weather.”

Me: “Yes, they sound perfect. I’ll try the [Blended Drink].”

Barista: “Oh, well, I’ll have to get the blender out.”

(The barista stares at me. I stare at her. After several more seconds of uncomfortable staring…)

Me: “Well, I guess I’ll just have an iced latte.”

Barista: “Great! I’ll get that started. Next time, you really should try one of our blended drinks!”

Me: “…”

Unfiltered Story #107409

, , , | Unfiltered | March 19, 2018

I was working the line and a customer comes and asks ”what kind of beans are the black beans?” And as politely as possible I say “uh… Black beans?”

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