You Want Chicken That Is Number-Crunchy

, , , , | Right | November 15, 2017

(I work at a fast food chain which is known for its fried chicken. I’m working the till at the front counter when a middle-aged woman walks into the store.)

Me: “Hi there, ma’am! How may I help you today?”

Customer: “Hi, I was just wondering how many chicken wings I would get if I bought a 20 pack?”

Me: “Uh… 20, ma’am.”

Customer: “Okay, cool. Also, do you have any specials on chicken today?”

Me: “Yup, we sure do! We are currently selling five pieces of chicken for $9.90.”

Customer: “Okay, and how many pieces of chicken would I get in that?”

Me: *just stands there bewildered*

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Well That’s Just Gravy

, , , , , | Working | June 26, 2017

(I work at a well-known fast food joint which specializes in fried chicken. We sell potato and gravy as a side to go with our popular bucket meals. On this particular day I arrive half-an-hour early for my shift, so I go and sit down and wait until it’s time to clock in. While I’m waiting I notice a customer, leaving the store with his young daughter, drop a tub of potato and gravy on the ground. The girl’s father panics and immediately goes and summons my manager.)

Customer: “I’m so sorry! My daughter has spilt potato and gravy everywhere.”

Manager: *cheerful and smiling* “That’s okay; don’t worry about it. It’s not a problem, really.”

Customer: “Thank you so much. Once again, I’m really sorry.”

(The customer then proceeds to exit the store with his young daughter. I then notice my manager making his way back to the office without even bothering to clean up the mess left behind by the customer’s daughter. As soon as I clock in, I go to clean up the mess, which has since been walked on by multiple customers over the half-an-hour period it had been left sitting there, getting smeared everywhere.)

Me: *sighs*

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A Catalog Of Errors, Part 3

, , | Right | February 9, 2016

(A customer comes in with an old catalogue and discovers the item he wants is no longer that price.)

Me: “Sorry, sir, that catalogue ended three-days ago. See the start and end dates on the front?

Customer: “I don’t give a f*** about where you’ve got dates. The price is in writing so you have to honour it! I know my rights!”

Related:
A Catalog Of Errors, Part 2
A Catalog Of Errors

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As A Rule Of Crumb

, , , , | Related | January 17, 2014

(I am babysitting. My little nephew wants what he calls a “yellow biscuit”: a type of cracker made from corn, so it is a light yellow colour.)

Nephew: “Auntie, can I have a yellow biscuit, please?”

Me: *being a bit silly* “Yes, I’ll get one for you. Does Mummy have yellow biscuits in the cupboard or do we need to get the crayons and colour one in?”

Nephew: “We’ve got lots. They’re in that tin.” *very solemnly* “You aren’t allowed to draw on biscuits. It’s a rule!”


This story is part of our Crayon Roundup!

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Flaky To The 9th Degree

, , , | Right | April 18, 2011

Customer: “Two supremes, please.”

Me: “Okay, and what type of crust?”

Customer: “Oh, that nice one. I had it the other day. It was thin and very yummy.”

Me: “Thin and crispy?”

(The customer starts making hand gestures, pinching her thumb and forefinger together.)

Customer: “It was thin and yummy. We had it the other day.”

Me: “We have a thin crust. Is that it?”

Customer: “That must be it.”

Me: “Okay, that’ll be $23.80.”

Customer: “What? That much?”

Me: “Yes, they’re $11.90 each.”

Customer: “They were only $8 each the other day.”

Me: “Was it a flaky base? We had a promotion for that, but it ended yesterday.”

Customer: “Yes! That was it. But it said it was until the end of the month.”

Me: “The promotion ended yesterday.”

Customer: “But it said until the 31st.”

Me: “I’m sorry. What said that?”

Customer: “The piece of paper.”

Me: “Oh, was it a coupon?”

Customer: “Uh… yes.”

Me: “I can’t give you the discount without the code on the coupon.”

Customer: “Oh. Hang on. Try 54261.”

Me: “No, that didn’t work.”

Customer: “Oh, there was another one. I think it had a 9 in it.”

Me: “I need the whole code.”

Customer: “It had a 9.”

Me: “I can’t do anything without the code.”

Customer: “But it had a 9!”


This story is part of our Demands For Discounts roundup!

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