Child: “I like this ride. I like horses but these ones aren’t real.”
Me: “Yup! Real ones are much bigger, probably twice as big as these horses.”
Child: “I rode one once!”
Me: “Really? That’s cool.”
Child: “Yeah. Real horses have eight legs.”
Me: “Oh. That’s… cool.”
This story is part of our Hilarious-Kids roundup!
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Kid: “Mommy, I want this candy!”
Mom: “No, you can’t have the candy. Put it back.”
Kid: “I WANT THIS CANDY!”
Mom: “You can’t have it!”
Kid: “I WANT THIS CANDY!”
(At this point, the mom takes the candy from the kid and hands it to me.)
Mom: *points at me* “The bad man took the candy! You can’t have it because the bad man took it!”
Kid: *in tears* “Why did you take the candy?!”
Me: *speechless*
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(A mom and little girl are waiting in line. I watch from a different line.)
Little Girl: “Can I have this candy?”
Mom: “No, put it back.”
Little Girl: “But that’s not fair! That’s not fair!”
Mom: “Cut that out!”
Little Girl: *takes a deep breath and calms down, then turns to her mom* “I’m killing you. I’m going to kill you.”
Mom: “…”
(A boy and his mother come up to my register. The boy starts asking questions about the ant farm we have on display.)
Boy: “Can they mate?”
Me: “No, there’s no queen in there.”
Boy: “Oh… so they can’t mate?”
Me: “No, they’re all female.”
Boy: “So they can’t?”
Mother: *turns to boy* “Okay, shut up or go away! You’re being annoying!”
(Santa was visiting our store, and every kid got a small bag of candy. Then this happened…)
Santa: “Here you go, little boy!”
Kid: “Thank you, Santa!”
Mom: “Aren’t you forgetting anything?”
Kid: “What, mommy?”
Mom: “Ask Santa for another bag for your brother like I told you.” *looks at Santa* “He’s sick at home and couldn’t come.”
Santa: “No problem!” *reaches for another bag*
Kid: “But mommy, I don’t have a brother!”
Mom: “…”
Santa: *puts bag back*
This story is part of the Children-Behaving-Better-Than-Their-Parents roundup!
Read the next Children-Behaving-Better-Than-Their-Parents roundup story!
Read the Children-Behaving-Better-Than-Their-Parents roundup!
This story is included in our Candy roundup!
