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On The Need For Male Role Models

, , , , , | Right | September 7, 2008

(While standing in line for the bathroom at a resort, I overhear two young boys talking.)

Boy #1: “Why are the lines for the girl’s bathroom always longer? Is it because the boy’s bathroom has that special sink?”

Boy #2: “You mean the urinal?”

Boy #1: “Yeah. ‘Cause you can fit like five guys around it.”

Boy #2: “Or, if they’re skinny, you can fit seven or eight.”

Boy #1: “And if they’re FAT you can only fit two.”


This story is part of the Overheard roundup!

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Read the Overheard roundup!

Must Be One Of Them Radioactive Horses

, , , , | Right | August 18, 2008

Child: “I like this ride. I like horses but these ones aren’t real.”

Me: “Yup! Real ones are much bigger, probably twice as big as these horses.”

Child: “I rode one once!”

Me: “Really? That’s cool.”

Child: “Yeah. Real horses have eight legs.”

Me: “Oh. That’s… cool.”

Kids, This Is What We Call “Scapegoating”

, , , , | Right | August 5, 2008

Kid: “Mommy, I want this candy!”

Mom: “No, you can’t have the candy. Put it back.”

Kid: “I WANT THIS CANDY!”

Mom: “You can’t have it!”

Kid: “I WANT THIS CANDY!”

(At this point, the mom takes the candy from the kid and hands it to me.)

Mom: *points at me* “The bad man took the candy! You can’t have it because the bad man took it!”

Kid: *in tears* “Why did you take the candy?!”

Me: *speechless*


This story is included in our Candy roundup!

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Click here to read the Candy roundup!

The Joys Of Motherhood

, , | Right | June 21, 2008

(A mom and little girl are waiting in line. I watch from a different line.)

Little Girl: “Can I have this candy?”

Mom: “No, put it back.”

Little Girl: “But that’s not fair! That’s not fair!”

Mom: “Cut that out!”

Little Girl: *takes a deep breath and calms down, then turns to her mom* “I’m killing you. I’m going to kill you.”

Mom: “…”

I See Purple Triangles And Rainbows In Your Future

, , , , | Right | June 10, 2008

(A boy and his mother come up to my register. The boy starts asking questions about the ant farm we have on display.)

Boy: “Can they mate?”

Me: “No, there’s no queen in there.”

Boy: “Oh… so they can’t mate?”

Me: “No, they’re all female.”

Boy: “So they can’t?”

Mother: *turns to boy* “Okay, shut up or go away! You’re being annoying!”