Me: “Sir, to configure the modem I need you to clear your desktop. Right-click on ‘networking’, and then select ‘properties’.”

Customer: “It turned blue. I don’t see ‘properties’. Now what?”

Me: “You don’t see a selection menu?”

Customer: “No, the icon just turned blue.”

Me: “Ah, I see. I need you to right-click on the icon.”

Customer: “I am right-clicking! Nothing is happening.”

Me: “Are you sure you are right-clicking?”

Customer: “Yes! I am right-clicking. As compared to what, wrong-clicking?!”

Me: “No, sir. As compared to left-clicking.”

(There is a noticeable silence.)

Customer: “Oh.”

This story is part of the Very Wrong Customers roundup!

Read the next Very Wrong Customers roundup story!

Read the Very Wrong Customers roundup!

Caller: “Yeah, the vents just turned on really suddenly.”

Me: “The vents turned on suddenly?”

Caller: “Yes.”

Me: “Is that a problem? Are you too hot or cold?”

Caller: “No, at the moment I’m fine.”

Me: “So, do you want to give me a call back if there’s a problem?”

Caller: “Sure thing. I’ll keep an eye on the situation.”

Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

Customer: “I’d like to return these flowers.”

Me: “Oh. Well, usually we don’t issue refunds for flowers. Can I ask what the problem is?”

Customer: “She said no.”

Me: “Let’s get you that refund.”

Did you find this story from our Water Your Plants roundup?

Click here to read the next story!

Click here to go back to the roundup!

Me: “Thank you for calling [Restaurant]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “I’ve got coupon for twelve wings free. But, it says it excludes boneless wings. So, I was wondering if I could place an order and get the boneless wings free.”

Me: “Sir, if it says it excludes the boneless wings, then I’m afraid I can’t do that.”

Customer: “Oh. So, even if I cross it off, it won’t work?”

This story is part of the Confused-By-Coupons roundup!

Read the next Confused-By-Coupons roundup story!

Read the Confused-By-Coupons roundup!

Caller: “It’s too cold in my room. Can you turn the air off?”

Me: “Turn it off?”

Caller: “It’s just freezing.”

Me: “The outside temperature is fifteen degrees. If we turn the air off, it will bring your office temperature closer to fifteen degrees.”

Caller: “Don’t do that. Just turn it off. I’d rather it be nothing than this cold!”