It’s The Most Wonderful Time To Jeer

, , , , | Right | December 24, 2018

(It’s Christmas Eve and the supermarket where I’m shopping is packed. I’ve done my best to get around and not lose my temper and have managed to get almost everything I need. I line up at the checkout, not necessarily at the shortest queue but the easiest to get to, given how packed it is. Shortly, a lady lines up behind me. At this point, I am sick of people, the queue, Christmas, and everything. I hate stupid questions. Sarcasm mode kicks in.)

Lady: “What are we lining up for? I just want to get out!”

Me: “We’re lining up for a really exciting roller coaster!”

Unfiltered Story #93338

, , | Unfiltered | September 7, 2017

(I’m putting my items through the self-checkout and get an alert because I’m purchasing alcohol. Once I’ve finished I see a worker come over and expect her to verify my age, etc. However see proceeds to pick up my bag, turn it upside down and dump everything on the scale. I am using a bag for life from another store.)

Worker: “We just need to put your bag through.”

(She tries to scan the bag which is clearly from another store (this store uses a blue bag while mine is white and green, the text and overall aesthetic is completely different as well). As expected it doesn’t pick it up.)

Me: “It’s from [other store]. It won’t work.”

Worker: *ignoring me* “Why isn’t it scanning?”

(She tries over and over, refusing to listen to me until she screams out in frustration and rips the bag in half.)

Worker: “Now look what you did! You’re going to have to get another now!”

(She tries to get one of the store’s bags when a manager intercepts her. The manager apologises to me and offers me a free replacement (despite it not being from my store). She also approves my alcohol and lets me go. I ask for my torn bag back as well before I leave. The worker is screaming so loudly at the manager by this point that half the checkout has stopped moving to watch the spectacle. I leave and a week later decide to shop at [other store]. While I’m there I decide to get my torn bag replaced (there’s a free exchange offer for damaged bags for life.)

Me: “Could I replace this please?”

Other Worker: “Sure…” *while grabbing another bag* “It looks like someone tried to rip it open.”

Me: “Someone did.”

Other Worker: “Your kids?”

Me: “Ugh, no. Someone at [Store] thought it was one of theres’ and—”

Other Worker: “Was it a woman? Short, with curly black hair?”

(I nod.)

Other Worker: “She worked here last Christmas.”

(She hands me my new bag and start my shopping. As I’m leaving I hear people at the services counter talking about the woman and laughing hysterically. Looks like she’s gotten herself a reputation.)

Why Honesty Is Not Always The Best Policy

, , | | Right | March 19, 2008

(Years ago I was working the closing shift at a local convenience store. It was late when a very elderly man came in and bought a six pack of beer, cigarettes and condoms. After ringing up the sale…)

Me: “Have a good night, sir!”

Him: “Oh I will, the missus is out of town!”

Me: *shocked and speechless*

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