It’s a quiet morning, so I’m leaning on the counter chatting with my coworker when a man walks up.

Me: “Good morning, sir. How can I help you today?”

Customer: “I need to block a number.”

Me: “Of course. If you hand me your phone, I can show you how to do that.”

Customer: “No, no, not my phone. There’s another line under my name. ‘A’ uses it. I want to stop ‘B’ from calling or texting ‘A’.”

I pause. This is not me censoring; he’s really saying ‘A’ and ‘B’.

Me: “…I’m sorry, who’s ‘A’?”

Customer: “Doesn’t matter. Just make ‘B’ disappear from ‘A’s phone.”

Me: “Well, the only way to do that would be for ‘A’ to block ‘B’ directly. Or, if you want something permanent, we can close the contract for that line entirely.”

Customer: “No, I don’t want to close the contract. Isn’t there anything else you can do?”

Me: “I’m afraid not. That’s beyond what we can control here. You’ll need to call the helpline for anything more technical.”

Customer: “Fine. I’ll do that.” *Aggressively walks away.*

My coworker wanders over, raising an eyebrow at my expression.

Coworker: “What was that about?”

Me: “I think… he’s a very protective dad.”

I’m working in a phone store, though technically I don’t need to. I’ve got a new job lined up, savings in the bank, and I’m counting down the days. Translation: my “give-a-d***” is running on fumes.

The other day, I get a call from a customer. Her account details appear on the screen, linked to the number she’s calling from:

Customer: “Do you have the [Phone Model] in stock right now?”

Me: “It’s not in the store at the moment, but we can order it in for you. It usually arrives in a couple of days.” 

Customer: “Well, that’s not good enough! I’ll just take my business elsewhere!”

Me: “That’s certainly something you’re within your rights to do.”

Dead silence. Then:

Customer: *Click.*

Fast forward to today. I’m behind the counter when guess who walks through the door? 

Customer: “I’d like to order [Phone Model].”

I recognize the voice and phone model. When I type in her account details, it’s confirmed.

Me: “Happy to help. By the way, how did looking elsewhere go for you?”

She freezes, lips pressed tight. No words. No excuses. Just a credit card shoved across the counter. 

I was surprised she was back so soon. Usually, it takes people at least a week to swallow their pride.

It is early in the pandemic, and even through lockdown, our telco stores are open with restrictions on customer limits. Enter elderly female customer.

Customer: “I’m having issues with my phone. It keeps going slowly, and I get these pop-ups.”

I request the customer to wipe down the phone as per protocol.

Me: “Ah, I see, it looks like your phone has a virus. This is easy enough to take care of.”

I proceed to start looking into the app that may be causing this.

Customer: *Leans in close and whispers.* “Is it… contagious?”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “The virus… is it contagious? Do I need to contact my family and friends?”

I realise at this point that we are dealing with the pandemic, and of course, someone who isn’t familiar with technology and its viruses would get confused. I explain this as simply as I can to the customer, and even though I’ve assured her it’s not THAT type of virus, she wasn’t convinced and left the store muttering about needing to let people know.

I’m working at the service desk on a busy Saturday. We’ve got a classic deli-style ticket system: take a number, wait your turn. It’s clearly posted everywhere.

A man strolls in, glances at the ticket machine, and waves it off with a scoff.

Me: “Sir, you’ll need to grab a number, and we’ll call you up when it’s your turn.”

Customer: “I don’t need a number. I just have a quick question.”

I shrug. We’re slammed. Five minutes later, he comes storming up to the counter, red-faced.

Customer: “Excuse me! I’ve been standing here forever, and you’re helping people who came in after me!”

Me: “That’s because they took a number, sir.”

Customer: “I told you I just had a quick question! I’ve been waiting twenty minutes! This is ridiculous!”

Me: “And I told you to take a number. That’s how the line works.”

Customer: “I shouldn’t have to! I’m the one standing here! Doesn’t anyone have common sense anymore?!”

I glance over at the machine with the bright red “Take a Number” sign. Three other customers, all with tickets in their hands, are watching in silence.

Me: “Sir, everyone else here has common sense. That’s why they took a number.”

The next ticket beeps. I look right at him, intense eye contact. I do not blink.

Me: “Number forty-seven, please.”

Customer: “So f****** stupid!”

He goes and takes a ticket and sulks in the corner until it’s his turn. His question? Can he get an upgrade on his contract, and can he buy out his current contract early? Hardly a “quick” one…

I do e-commerce orders for our cell phone dealer. One morning, I log on to find three phone orders from the same client, all of which are for $0 phones on new two-year contracts. I pull up his file and see that he is currently on a two-year contract that he’s only been on for a few months.

I figure this is possibly just him looking to add a few lines to his account (though in my experience, those chances were small). For privacy and security reasons, we call the customers on a recorded line to verify account information in order to get the orders done. I phoned him to go over his orders, and this is how that conversation went:

Me: “Hi, [Customer]! I’m just calling about the phone orders you made early this morning. I just need to confirm something really quick. I noticed in your file that you already bought a phone from us two months ago. I take it you’re wanting to put new phone numbers on these phones?”

Customer: “Nope! I’m just taking advantage of the benefits of my contract.”

Me: *Confused.* “What benefits are you referring to?”

Customer: “Well, I have one contract signed, so I’m getting all these $0 phones from this one contract.”

Me: “…sir. I’m afraid that’s not how phone contracts work. Each phone you want to purchase must be on a separate two-year contract with its own phone numbers and plans attached to it.”

Customer: “So… I can’t just buy them outright for $0 with the contract I am already paying right now?”

It took a few minutes for him to finally get it. When he did, to put it lightly, he wasn’t exactly happy and the orders were cancelled.