Wasn’t Going To Tell You For A Few Generations

| Israel | Working | August 31, 2016

(I use an old, un-hackable mobile phone and buy prepaid air-time to avoid billing hassles. When the service provider changes hands I go to their center to see about a package deal. I decide to stay with prepaid air-time but the supervisor has to open a station to make the charge. While waiting for the program to come up she ignores me and starts lecturing the sales rep, waving my credit card around in her hand.)

Me: *uncomfortable* “Could you make the charge in the meantime, please?”

Supervisor: *to me* “The program hasn’t come up yet.”

(Finally the charge is made and I wait to get notice on my mobile. No message, and no service either. The supervisor has disappeared.)

Me: “No message has come in!”

Clerk #1: “Oh, you have to turn it off and then on again before it shows.”

(I do so three times but nothing happens. I go in search of the supervisor.)

Clerk #2: “You can’t come back here; she’s on her break!”

(I sit down to wait, fuming a little. After several minutes one of the clerks looks over at me.)

Clerk: “Oh! There’s no ‘second generation’ reception here. You’ll have to take it outside for it to work!”

Me: “And you couldn’t have told me this ten minutes ago?!”

(The phone worked and still works well outside – which is more than the staff were doing inside!)

Not Much Assurance About The Insurance, Part 3

| UT, USA | Right | June 28, 2016

Customer: “I have had this phone for two and a half months and the screen is already broken. Don’t you guys stand next to your products?”

Manager: “Of course we do, if it is defective, but no electronic store can cover hardware physical damage for free. That’s why most places offer insurance on their products. We also sell cases and screen guards to decrease the risk of damage in the instance of dropping or scratches.”

Customer: “I don’t believe in insurance. If the product was built poorly enough to need a case and a screen guard it should have come with one. I mean cars come with bumpers.”

Me: “But if you total your car, a bumper isn’t going to do you any good. Nothing is indestructible. Even cars have insurance and deductibles if you get into a wreck. The only difference in this instance is that you decided to keep it out of its “seatbelt” and have denied any insurance we have tried to offer you for the entire length of time you have been with this carrier.”

(The customer kept grumbling about our incompetence and how he should be given a new phone because we need to stand by our product.)


Can No Longer Handle Your Baggage

, | AZ, USA | Right | March 24, 2016

(I work inside a mall for an authorized retailer of a certain big company when I receive a phone call…)

Me: “How may I help you?”

Customer: “Ya, hi. Umm, I have a bag phone I’d like to activate. Can y’all do that?”

(A bag phone was an early mobile-phone that had to be carried around like a bag or a back-pack.)

Me: “Well, uhh, how old is the phone?”

Customer: “I bought it brand new in 1996! Best phone I ever had. Been out of the world a spell and would like to get my phone hooked back up.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but your phone is not compatible with our network anymore. If you’d like we can get you set up with a new phone that is compatible.”


Me: “Well, they’re heavy, unwieldy, and put off way more radiation than today’s phones. Also, and sir, this is the important bit, they’re not compatible anymore. Your phone uses an analog technology. We all use digital now. I’m sorry, there’s literally no way to use your bag phone.”

Customer: “Well, I’ll just call your competitor and have them do it.”

Me: “Have a nice day, sir.”

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 47

| Manchester, NH, USA | Right | February 16, 2016

(I’m working with a particularly impatient customer who just wants to upgrade but I’ve been having issues with the system. After calling several tech departments, I finally discover what the problem is.)

Me: “Ma’am, it looks as though you previously held an account with us that has gone into collections. Due to issues with our system at the time that you set up this new account, it has gone unnoticed until now. Unfortunately we will not be able to upgrade your phones until that account has been paid in full.”

Customer: “But that doesn’t make any sense. It was three years ago. They need to forget it.”

Me: “Ma’am, that’s not how debt works. You still owe us money and we can’t extend any more credit until it’s paid.”

Customer: *yelling now* “BUT IT WAS THREE YEARS AGO! IT SHOULD BE GONE!”

Me: “No, ma’am, it’s not gone until you pay it.”

Customer: “This is ridiculous. I’m going to another carrier. You just lost a customer.”

Me: “That’s very unfortunate, ma’am, and I’m sorry you feel that way. Would you like the number of the collection agency so you can pay us what you owe us?”

Customer: *takes phone number and attempts to dramatically storm out*


Credit Them With That Stupid Idea

| CA, USA | Working | January 14, 2016

(My friend has ordered a phone. The store has told her it would be ready for her, and when she gets there they had already sold it.)

Cashier: “You could always just order another one online and wait for a refund for this one.”

Customer: “I don’t exactly have $600 sitting around just waiting to be spent on anything I want.”

Cashier: “Why not?”

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