Make The Yule-tide Gay

| Folkestone, England, UK | Bigotry, Holidays

(I am browsing the Christmas cards. Next to me is a man also looking at the cards. He has two different ‘for my brother and his boyfriend at Christmas’ cards in his hand, deciding which one he wants. A woman walks past.)

Woman: “Disgusting! They shouldn’t sell such filthy cards in this shop!”

Man: “Um…”

Woman: “It’s a sin! Political correctness gone mad! They should NOT be promoting queers!”

Man: “Er…”

Woman: “What sort of thing does that say to my children?”

Man: “It would say that I would like to say ‘Merry Christmas’ to my brother and his wonderful boyfriend, whom the whole family adores, and it would teach them tolerance and understanding of others.”

Woman: “Well!” *storms off*

Man: *sweetly* “Merry Christmas!”

Aisle Never Stop Answering You

| USA | Bizarre, Wild & Unruly

(I work in a small card shop in a mall. It’s rather cramped and the aisles are difficult to navigate if there are many people in the store. Small note: There are two phones in the store; one in the office, one near the registers.)

Manager: “[Me], will you please put these cards back in their pockets?”

Me: “Sure.”

(I begin to walk to the proper space when an older customer stops me, smiling.)

Customer: “NOW what are you going to do?”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “What happens if the phone rings and you can’t get past me to get it? Do you just let it ring?”

Me: “No, there is a phone near the registers.”

Customer: “What? Nuh-uh. There can’t be one up there!”

Me: “I believe there is still a phone up there, sir.”

Customer: “Prove it! Show me!”

(I take the customer up to the registers and show him there is indeed another phone.)

Customer: “You smart alec! Why do you need two phones in a small store?!”

Me: “In case the store is full and we can’t reach the other in time.”

Customer: *quickly exits the store, defeated*

Manager: “What the heck just happened?!”

This Problem Has Been Addressed

| Annapolis, MD, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “I haven’t been receiving my coupons in the mail! I want you to fix it!”

Me: “Okay. Let me look you up in our system.”

(The customer isn’t coming up under the phone number, last name, or zip code.)

Customer: “Oh. When I signed up, I didn’t put that info down.”

Me: “Why not?”

Customer: “I don’t want you guys mailing me junk!”

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