(I work in a chocolatier shop. We’ve opened at midnight for our Black Friday sale. My job is to greet shoppers as they come in and offer everyone a sample. By 4:00 am, I’m exhausted from the rush. A customer comes in. He is red-faced and wearing a shirt several sizes too small.)

Customer: “Hey. You know what? I’ve always thought you guys should sell chocolate belly buttons!”

Me: “Um… I’m sorry?”

Customer: “You should sell chocolate belly buttons!”

(The customer takes a sample and then leaves. I turn to my manager.)

Me: “What was that?”

Manager: “Oh, he was definitely high. Welcome to Black Friday sales!”

This story is part of our Black Friday roundup!

Read the next Black Friday roundup story!

Read the Black Friday roundup!

(I work in a little sweet shop. We have a promotion going on where you can get two free sweets if you can spin a wheel and get it to land on the prize. The front door opens and a young boy and his mother walk in.)

Me: “Hello, welcome to [store name].”

Mother: “Hi, I was told I could get some free candy here.”

Me: “That’s right; you can get two free sweets of your choice if you can get a win on the prize wheel!”

Boy: “I wanna try!”

(The mother grumbles angrily. The boy walks over to the counter and takes hold of the wheel.)

Me: “Okay, good luck, you have one chance, okay?”

Boy: “Got it!”

(The boy spins, but the spinner doesn’t land on ‘Winner’. The boy shrugs and walks back to his mother.)

Mother: “Where’s his candy?!”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Mother: “You said, he’d get free candy.”

Me: “Yes, if he was able to spin to win. Maybe next time, okay little guy?”

Boy: “Always next time, Mom.”

Mother: “Look at him! He’s distraught! You made my son unhappy! Get your manager.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am.”

(The boy is dragged by his ear to the corner of the shop and is whispered to.)

Manager: “What seems to be the problem, miss?”

Mother: “She made my son cry! He won the free candy, fair and square!”

Boy: “No I—”

(The mother gives him a glare.)

Manager: “I’m sorry for your troubles; I’ll give you the candy you won.”

(He gives the boy two pieces of our signature candy, and they leave the store.)

Manager: “Sorry about that; it’s not worth a fight. Not much lost really.”

Me: “But I—”

(I am cut off by the door slowly creaking open. The boy is back, now alone.)

Boy: “Here’s your candy back; sorry about my Mom. I know I didn’t win.”

Me: “Thank you so much, but you can—”

(He leaves before I can finish. I will always remember the little boy’s honesty, even though none of us ever saw him in the shop again.)

(I am working in a candy store. There are a lot of small children, which means a lot of small children fussing, whining, complaining, begging, threatening, and so on. A mother is helping her daughter select candies, and once she finishes, mutters to herself that she might as well get some candy of her own, too. The daughter does not seem to hear this; she only sees her mother starting to put an unwanted candy into the bag.)

Daughter: “Mummy! No, thank you! Mummy, please! I would not like that! MUMMY! No, THANK you! I would not LIKE that, Mummy! Mummy, PLEASE! NO, THANK YOU! I WOULD NOT LIKE THAT! NO, THANK YOU!”

(Politest tantrum ever!)

This story is part of our Kids-In-Candy-Stores roundup!

Read the next Kids-In-Candy-Stores roundup story!

Read the Kids-In-Candy-Stores roundup!

Customer: *in a Southern drawl* “Do you speak English?”

Me: “Sir?”

Customer: “I said, DO YOU SPEAK ENGLISH?!”

Me: “Sir, I can assure you that I speak English. Why would you ask?”

Customer: “Hey, look, I ain’t never been to Massachusetts. I thought all y’all spoke Russian or some s***!”

(This is a call from me to a customer who owns a candy store, regarding an order they placed for a candy-making mix. We had the wrong expiration date for their credit card. Please note that this order is marked as being needed in a rush.)

Woman: “Hello, [candy store].”

Me: “Hello, this is [name] from [candy supply company].”

Woman: “We’re not interested!” *hangs up*

(I call back.)

Woman: “Hello, [candy store].”

Me: “Hi, this is [name] again. I think there was a misunderstanding. We’re calling about an order you already placed.”

Woman: *scoffs* “Really…”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. [Candy store owner] called and put in an order this morning for candy mix, but we must not have heard the expiration date correctly.”

Woman: “So, you call saying we ordered something, and you want me to just give you a credit card number?”

Me: “No, we have the number. We just need to check the expiration date. Is [candy store owner] there?”

Woman: “No.”

Me: “Okay, could I leave a message for him that we won’t be able to send out your candy mix without getting the correct expiration date?”

Woman: “We’re a homemade candy company. What makes you assume we use a mix for our candy?”

Me: “Because we sell it to you.”

Woman: “We make our candy homemade. We’re not interested in buying yours. How dare you suggest we make it from a mix?!”

Me: “Ma’am, a lot of places label their candy homemade, even when they make it from a mix. I can cancel the order if you’d like, but I’d prefer to speak to [candy store owner] before I do.”

Woman: “He’s not here, and I’m sure as h*** not giving you any credit card information. It’s a f***ing scam!”

(The woman hangs up again. About a week later, I get a call from the man who owns the store.)

Owner: “Hi, this is [owner] from [candy store]. I was calling to see where my order was.”

Me: “We tried to get in touch with you about having the wrong expiration date on the credit card the same day you placed the order. The woman I spoke to told me you would be making the candy from scratch and were no longer interested in the order, so I canceled it.”

Owner: “S***! I’m gonna kill her!”