(I am a volunteer at a small charity thrift store. As there is a line at the cash, I am helping customers who want to see certain items while my coworker rings other people through.)

Customer: “Can I see that girl’s dress in the window?”

Me: “Sure! But just so you know, any items displayed in the windows can’t be sold until next week.”

Customer: “That’s fine; I just want to see what size it is.”

(I go to the window and start to retrieve the only girl’s dress there.)

Customer: “No, that’s the wrong one! I said I want the baby dress in the window!”

(There are two baby dresses in the window.)

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. Which one would you like to see? There are two baby dresses.”

Customer: “The one in the window!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, but which of the two in the window would you like to see?”

Customer: *agitated* “The one in the window!”

(I take one of the dresses at random.)

Me: “Was it this one?”

Customer: “No, the other one!”

Me: “The dress you wanted to see is sized for 24 months.”

Customer: “Great! I’ll buy it!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m sorry, but items in the window can’t be sold until next week.”

Customer: “Well, how could I know that? You said earlier that things in the window aren’t until next week but how could I know I couldn’t buy the dress?!”

(My coworker saw me getting frustrated and took over, pretending to sympathize with her to get her out the door. Later, that same coworker informed me that she recognized the woman as a problem customer from her days working at the local grocery store but couldn’t find a way to warn me in time!)

This story is part of our Thrift Store roundup!

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(I have a severe aversion to getting bloodwork done. While I know it’s all in my head, I’ve managed to faint and have seizures several times. To make everyone’s life easier when I absolutely need bloodwork done, I make sure to tell whoever is doing it about the problem. USUALLY, they find a way to work with me.)

Me: *explains my problem with bloodwork* “It’d probably be best if I can lie down, if possible.”

Male Nurse: “You’re a grown-up. No one likes needles. You’ll be fine.”

Me: “It’s more than that. I’ve had seizures…”

Male Nurse: “Look, if anything happens, I’ll catch you. Okay?”

Me: “Um… okay…”

(Bloodwork begins. The next thing I remember is everything going black. I wake up on the floor.)

Female Nurse: “Are you okay?!”

Male Nurse: “She’s faking it. No one faints from having blood drawn! She just wanted to lie down. She even asked for a bed.”

Female Nurse: “That’s why  we have a bed.” *to me* “Sweetie, did you know this would happen?”

Me: “I told him I’ve fainted and had seizures from bloodwork, and asked to lie down, so… yes?”

([Female Nurse] helps me up, walks me to the room with a bed, and lies me down, leaving juice at the side table beside me. Once I’m okay to stand up again…)

Female Nurse: “Do you want to try again?”

Me: “Um… can you do it?”

Female Nurse: “Sure. Don’t worry; he’s gone home for the day.”

(I got my bloodwork done, lying down, and managed to not black out, though I still did get lightheaded. Thank you, nice lady nurse.)

This story is part of our Epilepsy roundup.

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Me: “What’s up, [Student]?”

Student: *looking sad* “Oh, teacher, I’m so depressed. I broke my girlfriend.”

Me: “You what?”

Student: “I found out she cheated on me so I had to break her.”

Me: “Oh, you broke up with her. That’s too bad.”

Student: “Yes, yes! I feel so bad; I think I might throw out.”

(A delivery driver arrives at our fairly small office, and I’m the one who was free to go to help bring in the shipment.)

Delivery Driver: “So what’s in all these boxes anyway?”

(As he asks, he grabs the first box and SLAMS it down on the tailgate of the truck.)

Me: “…that would be light bulbs.”

Delivery Driver: “…oh.”

(Luckily for both of us, we deal with LED lights – which are made of plastic, not glass!)

(I work customer service for a large Canadian grocery retailer. This exchange takes place just around Thanksgiving, when we had signs for Diwali and Halloween as well.)

Customer: “Excuse me! What are these signs?”

(She gestures to the purple signs above a display of flowers which read ‘Happy Diwali’.)

Me: “Those are signs for Diwali. It’s the Indian Festival of Lights, celebrated by a billion-plus people worldwide.”

Customer: “Take it down.”

Me: “…I’m sorry?”

Customer: “Take it down. I don’t like it. How racist.”

Me: “I assure you the holiday is not racist, as everyone is invited to participate if they would like to, and the deals we have for the holiday are applicable to all customers.”

Customer: “But I don’t get to participate! I don’t like it. I want you to take it down.”

Me: “Well, do you celebrate Thanksgiving?”

Customer: “Yes. But these people are—”

Me: “—These people may not celebrate Thanksgiving, or Halloween, or Christmas, and we are an equal opportunity employer, so we accommodate several cultures and their respective traditions. As well as Diwali, we market for Chinese New Year’s and Eid.

Customer: “You must take this sign down, or I will be calling head office.”

Me: “You can get their number at the customer service desk. Head Office sent us these signs. They also wished their Indian employees a Happy Diwali. If you have any other questions, I’ll be happy to help; otherwise, I’m afraid we cannot continue this discussion.”

Customer: “Fine! I’ll call them! I’ll be sure to give them your name, too!”

Me: “That’s quite all right with me. My name is [distinctly North Indian name] and I hope you have a happy Thanksgiving. Happy Diwali, as well!”

This story is part of the Lunar New Year roundup!

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