(I work at a bakery that sells primarily fresh bread. I am opening and setting up bread when the first customer of the day walks in. Being the only sales worker there at the time, I drop what I am doing to serve the customer. Keep in mind this woman’s first language is English.)

Customer: “Do you have that one but like… as a bag of slices?”

Me: “Oh, we slice the bread here; that’s no problem.”

Customer: “Okay, but… I need like… a bag of slices.”

Me: “Um, yeah, I can just slice it for you.”

Customer: “But do you have it in a bag of slices?”

Me: “I can put that loaf in a machine that will slice it… and then put it in a bag.”

Customer: “I just want a bag of slices.”

Me: “Here. Let me show you.”

(I take the loaf, slice it for her, and present the sliced loaf in a plastic bag.)

Customer: “That’s exactly what I wanted!”

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(I work at a store specializing in magazines and newspapers. We’re located near the business center of the city, so we get a lot of business people who tend to be haughty or dismissive. One such customer is a regular who usually comes early in the morning.)

Me: “Would you like a bag, sir?”

(The customer has earphones in, and neither looks at me nor answers. I speak a little louder, moving to catch his attention.)

Me: “Sir?”

(The customer takes his purchases and leaves without a word. A few days later, I see him again. My assistant manager is stocking gum packets near the register.)

Me: *suspecting it’ll be a repeat from the other day* “Would you like a bag, sir?”

(The customer still has earphones still in, and never looks at me or answers. My assistant manager notices there was no answer.)

Assistant Manager: “Sir, would you like a bag?”

Me: “Don’t bother, [Assistant Manager]. He never answers.”

(The customer leaves with his purchases, again never saying a word. Later that day, he returns, and flags a coworker, asking to see the manager.)

Customer: “Your clerk was very rude to me!”

Manager: “What happened?”

(The assistant manager spots the customer and comes over, giving her version of the event, as well.)

Manager: “The clerk did exactly what she had to do. You can’t come in here and act like you’re above everyone, ignore them, and then come back to complain when they don’t expect it. If you don’t show respect to my employees, you can buy your newspapers elsewhere.”

(The customer didn’t cause a scene — possibly because the manager was a tall, large man — but his attitude improved radically from then on. It was met with the courtesy and professionalism that had otherwise always been offered to him.)

Customer: “I need a pen refill.”

(I’m working cash, so I can’t leave the register to help him.)

Me: “Okay, they’re in aisle five, and I’ll page someone to meet you over there.”

(The customer stares at me, looking confused.)

Me: “Is that okay?”

Customer: “I want a pen refill!”

Me: “Yes, okay. They’re in aisle five, and I can get someone to meet you there and give you a hand.”

(The customer continues to stare at me, all confused.)

Me: “Do you want me to get someone to help you?”

Customer: “I just want a refill for my pen!”

Me: “Okay… Right. So… They’re located in aisle five. If you walk down to aisle five, I’ll make sure someone meets you there… to help you.”

Customer: “Oh, I have to get it myself, do I?”

(I am tidying around my department in a big box store when I find a customer’s wallet on the floor nearby. Store policy is to have two employees present when you open the wallet to check for identification. I grab a nearby associate and we open the wallet, locate the customer’s driver’s license, and take the wallet to the customer service desk where I page the customer to the desk by name. Shortly after paging I see a man storming up to the desk.)

Me: “Hello, sir, did yo—”

Customer: “Why the h*** did you page me? It’s embarrassing!”

Me: “Sir, we found your wallet.”

Customer: “I have my d*** wallet. And I have shopping to do!”

(The customer turns to leave.)

Me: “Sir! Could you please just humour me and check for your wallet?”

Customer: “I have shopping to do, and I have my d*** wallet.”

Me: “Then how did I get your name to page you?”

(The customer stopped walking away from the desk, patted down the back pocket of his jeans, and when he couldn’t find his wallet, stomped back to the desk, grabbed it from me, and stormed off without so much as a thank-you.)

(A lady orders two pepperoni pizzas and her total comes out to $10.82. She hands me a ten and then pulls out Canadian coins for the change.)

Me: “Sorry, I can’t accept those as payment.”

Customer: “Why?”

Me: “Because this isn’t Canada?”

Customer: *argues with me saying it shouldn’t matter* “—you should accept them; some b*stard here gave them to me so you should have to take them back!”

(We aren’t allowed to argue with customers so I just stand there and repeat that I can’t accept her coins. Eventually she pulls out 82 cents then takes her order and throws her Canadian coins in our tip jar. My manager looks at me after she leaves and asks:)

Manager: “She does realize Canada is 1500 miles north of here, right?”