(I am working in a board game store in the mall, helping customers find different games and items during the Black Friday weekend. It has been hectic, but a part of my job is making sure that customers are being taken care of. During the rush, I spot a woman looking intently at our board game wall with some games in her hands, so I decide to make sure she has been helped and see if she has any questions.)

Me: *walking over to her* “Hi there. Is there anything I can help you with or find today?”

Customer: *turning, glaring at me as if I had done something to her* “Can’t you see I’m on the phone?! Honestly! This new generation is so disrespectful!”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you were on the phone. I just thought you looked like you needed some help, because you were staring at our game wall quite intently.”

Customer: *at the top of her lungs* “How stupid can you be?! I am on the phone; shut up! Honestly, you f****** kids! Such disrespect for adults!”

Me: “Ma’am, please don’t swear; this is a family-friendly store and if you continue yelling and making a scene, I will have to ask you to leave.”

Customer: “But I am a f****** paying customer! It is your f****** job to do what I say, and I am saying to leave me the f*** alone!”

Me: “You may now leave the store by yourself, or I will be calling the mall security to escort you out of the store.”

(The customer let out a loud screeching noise before throwing one of the games at me — the largest expansion of a popular railroad game — before bolting out of the store. Luckily, my assistant manager saw the entire thing and the customer ended up being arrested for trespassing and assault. Apparently, this wasn’t the first time she’d done something like this in the mall and she had been banned for life!)

(My husband and I decided to buy a new house. It is a showhome, and because of that, the builder insists that it has to stay “on show” until a certain date, even though it is now ours. This date is roughly six weeks from the day that we have to vacate our old house. That leaves us scrambling to find somewhere to live for ourselves, our very small daughters, and our two cats. We find a motel that is fairly cheap and will allow us to stay for the entire six weeks, and luckily, we have friends who agree to look after the cats. We still have to get our girls to and from daycare, and ourselves to and from our jobs. Needless to say, though, this is all fairly complicated and stressful. Add to that the fact that our daughters are only four and two, and I am working two jobs. Fast forward to when our new house is finally ready. My parents fly in from their city to help us move in. A few days later, I need to return some books to the library, so I invite my mum to come with me.)

Librarian: “You realize that these books are overdue?”

Me: “Really? Oh, dear. My life has been a bit crazy lately. How much do I owe?”

Librarian: “$6.”

Me: “Yikes. I guess it’s people like me who keep the library funded, though, eh?” *laughs*

Librarian: *takes my money without changing expression*

(As we are leaving…)

Me: “I guess he’s heard that ‘joke’ before.”  

Mum: *silent*

Me: “It wasn’t all that funny anyway.”

Mum: *coldly* “It’s more likely that he couldn’t believe anyone could be so stupid as to accrue $6 in library fines. What on earth were you thinking?”

Me: *stunned and hurt* “Mum, have you any idea how nuts it’s been for me over the last few weeks? Some things were bound to slip through the cracks.”

Mum: “Whatever. You should have been more careful.”

(I was very thankful when she and Dad flew home a couple of days later.)

Me: “Hi. Thank you for calling [Company]; how can I help you?”

Customer: “Hi. Channel [number] is out.”

Me: “Ah. Yes, we know about that one, and in fact, all channels provided by [Company] are out right now due to a storm on the west coast.”

Customer: “Well, when are you going to fix it?!”

Me: “Uh… There’s no telling when the storm will be over, ma’am. We just have to wait and see.”

Customer: “So?! What are you going to do about it?!”

Me: “Uh… There’s nothing to be done to ‘fix’ it, ma’am. We just have to be patient and wait for the storm to be over, and it will come back all on its own.”

Customer: “HMPH! That’s unacceptable!” *hangs up*

(I am the clueless customer here. I’ve just gotten my first “real” job and I need good-quality office clothes. I go to a fairly high-end store and buy almost $1,000.00 worth of outfits, which is a huge amount of money for me.)

Salesperson: *seeing my face as I’m paying* “Hey, just so you know, if these clothes go on sale in the next two weeks, we’ll refund you the difference.”

Me: “Really? Awesome!” *skips off happily with my new duds*

(The salesperson was very clear about the “in the next two weeks” part, but my brain somehow didn’t process that. I got it into my head that if what I’d bought went on sale at any time, even if it was months in the future, I’d still get money back. So, three months later, the store has a huge “end of season sale.”)

Me: *carrying in a massive armful of clothes and my receipt* “Hi! I’m here for my refund.”

Salesperson: “Um… refund?”

Me: “Yup!” *hands over receipt*

Salesperson: “This is from three months ago, ma’am.”

Me: “That’s right.”

Salesperson: *looks at clothes* “Is there anything wrong with them?”

Me: “No, I love them. I’ve been wearing everything constantly since I bought them in the spring.”

Salesperson: “Then I’m confused.”

(We finally got things straightened out, and I slunk out, very embarrassed, with all my stuff and no refund. Thankfully, she was very nice; she probably saw how young I was and realized that this was my first time buying anything really nice.)

(When I am a kid, a good friend lives across the street with his grandparents. One day, my dad and I see him and his grandmother piling into the car, the grandmother visibly upset. Curious, we go over.)

Dad: “Everything all right?”

Friend’s Grandfather: “Yeah, [Friend] just hurt his hand using the stapler. It is still lodged in there, so [Grandmother] is taking him to the clinic.”

Dad: “Why? They are just going to take it out and then put a new staple in!”

Friend’s Grandfather: “That’s what I said! They are wasting three hours!”

(My friend returned later, with a — sterilized — surgical staple and relieved grandmother. By then, both my dad and his grandfather had thoroughly discussed which tool in their toolboxes they would have used to take care of the problem at home.)