Making This Whole Process Overdrawn

, , , , , , | Right | October 4, 2018

(A policyholder has recently purchased an insurance policy and chosen the monthly payment option with payments withdrawn automatically from his checking account.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. [My Name] speaking; how can I assist you today?”

Customer: “My name is [Customer], and you people have really messed up, and I’m mad! You need to fix this right now!”

Me: “I have your policy information pulled up and would be glad to help in any way I can. Please explain what has happened.”

Customer: “I’ve only had my policy a month, and you’ve already taken another payment from my checking account. Why did you take more money? I already paid for my policy!”

Me: “You purchased the policy just over a month ago, and your payments are due each month on the same day as your policy started. We submitted the request on [date], as per the agreement. What seems to be the problem?”

Customer: “My checking account is now overdrawn, and it’s your fault. I didn’t give you permission to take any money!”

Me: “Actually, you did. When you signed up for insurance, you paid for only one month of coverage, agreed to monthly payments, provided the routing number and account number for your checking account, and signed a form agreeing to the terms for electronic payments. You were also provided with a schedule, and we sent you email reminders of the date and amount both ten days and three days prior to the withdrawal, even though we are not required by the contract to do so. It is not our error that your account is now overdrawn, and there is nothing I can do to fix it.”

Customer: “Yeah, yeah, I get all that, but why did you take money from my account?”

Me: “Because that’s the way monthly automatic payments work?!”

Customer: “F*** you!”

Shoot Them A Joke If You Shoot Me Some Insulin

, , , , | Right | October 2, 2018

(I work for a company that does underwriting for loan programs in other states, and thus talk to a lot of contractors. I’m also a type-two diabetic who occasionally has blood sugar crashes. I’ve just explained to a contractor what he needs in order to get paid on a job, which his client insists has already been taken care of, and I am feeling the light-headed wooziness that comes with a blood sugar crash.)

Me: *trying to get through the call quickly to go get something to eat* “Is there anything else I can help you with today, sir?”

Contractor: “Yeah… Could you just shoot me?”

Me: “Sir, I can’t do that; it’s illegal. Also, you’re in New Jersey and I’m in Wisconsin; that’s crossing state lines, and I don’t want to get the FBI involved.”

Coworker: *snorts, then starts laughing*

Contractor: *quiet for a second, then bursts out laughing* “Fair enough! Have a good night!”

Furnishing Their Futures

, , , , | Right | October 1, 2018

(Our government can take money from a customer’s welfare money to pay for child maintenance. It’s usually a nominal charge of a few pounds.)

Caller: *angry and shouting throughout call* “Why am I being charged for children’s furniture?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Caller: “You are taking money out of my benefit to pay for furniture. I haven’t had furniture from you and I don’t want to give anything to charity.”

Me: “I am sorry; I don’t know what you’re talking about. We don’t take money for any furniture. Are you sure the charge has come from us? Where have you seen this charge?”

Caller: “It’s on my award letter. You are taking money for a child furniture scheme!”

Me: “No, that’s, ‘child future scheme.’”

Caller: “Oh.” *hangs up*

Unfiltered Story #122243

, | Unfiltered | October 1, 2018

(A company has been trying to get in contact witch my mom for the past week, but since they called so early in the day when my mom wasn’t at home, they try again the next day, and the day after that, and the day after that… By the fifth time I’m starting to get a bit annoyed at them.)
Caller: “Hello, I’m calling from [company], and-”
Me: “She’s not at home right now.”
Caller: “…Wha…?” *confused silence*  “Uhm… Ok, sorry to bother you.” *hangs up*
Me: *silently chuckling to myself*

Unfiltered Story #122143

, , | Unfiltered | September 26, 2018

(It’s February 2015 and the North East is being pummeled by snow storms. This is causing shipping delays for many people. I work for a major cell phone company who I will refer to as +++ and @@@ is a major shipping carrier that we use for 1-2 day shipping. However, there is no same day shipping, only in store pick up if the store has the item in stock.)

Me: Thank you for calling +++, how can I help you today?

Customer: (very irate) I want to talk to a supervisor!

Me: I can tell you’re upset. I’d be happy to help if I can since I can do as much as my supervisor. What’s going on?

Customer: I want to report the last rep I was talking to. They were very obnoxious and rude!

Me: Oh no! I’m so sorry you had to go through that. I’ll be happy to help. While I’m filling out the report, what was going on?

Customer: I ordered a phone yesterday and I was promised it would arrive today. I just checked @@@’s website and it says all deliveries for today are delayed due to a severe winter storm! That’s not right! I paid for overnight shipping, I deserve to get the phone today!

Me: *pause* Well let me go check out @@@’s website and see what’s going on as well. *pulls it up and enters the customer’s tracking number* Well I see here, it’s set to go to Indiana but because of all the bad snow storms that’ve been raging in the north east so far this year, it’s causing @@@ to ground their trucks for the saftey of their workers. I do apologize but there’s no way anyone could have accurately expected the snow storm to be so bad that @@@ had to delay delivery.

Customer: That’s not my problem, that’s +++’s problem! I paid for overnight shipping and I should get it today! You need to tell @@@ to send someone out with my phone.

Me: I apologize for the inconvenience but we have no more control over @@@’s employees as they have over ours. Imagine if it was your spouse or your child working for @@@ in Indiana with the storm. Would you want them to go out to deliver or would you rather them stay safe at home?

Customer: You guys always make me go out in the storm to pay my bill! Why shouldn’t @@@ be out delivering?!

Me: We actually provide several ways to pay your bill other than a store: you can mail it in, call it in, or pay online through our website or your bank’s website. We want you to be as safe as possible. We would not want you out in that weather any more than you would want to go out in it. We would even provide an exception should any of the other options not work and you were to call us for an extension.

Customer: It’s not the same! You make me go to the store to pay! @@@ should have their delivery drivers out in the storm!

Me: Again, I do apologize for the inconvenience, but there’s no way +++ could ask a @@@ delivery driver to risk their life to deliver any packages if the weather is too dangerous even if we did have the authority to tell another company what to do.

(At this point, the customer changes her story on the delivery day.)

Customer: I don’t care! I was supposed to have this delivered to my house yesterday and according to @@@’s website, the deliveries were delayed starting today! +++ lost my phone!

Me: (Not going to argue about the date switch track directly) We sent it to @@@ and they clearly have it tracked up to the point of the shipping delay. If it was supposed to be delivered yesterday before the storm hit, then I would be more than happy to transfer you over to them to find out what’s going on.

Customer: Now you’re just passing the buck! I don’t want to pay for services while I don’t have my phone and it’s +++’s fault!

Me: I can understand not wanting to pay for services you can’t use while waiting for the new phone–I wouldn’t want to either. I will be more than happy to show you how you can put a free temporary hold on your account until the phone arrives.

Customer: You don’t get it! I run a business off my phone! I can’t use my phone, I don’t want to pay for my phone if I can’t use it since I don’t have my new one and it’s all +++’s fault!

Me: I understand that because you can’t use your phone you do not want to pay for it and I will be happy to show you how to put billing on hold so you don’t pay for what you can’t use. As +++ is not in possession of your package when we handed it to @@@ to deliver to you–the delivery now being delayed because it is too dangerous for @@@’s drivers to be on the road and there is no way +++ can order a @@@ to do anything, much less have their drivers risk their life–the best I can suggest is calling @@@ to see what they can do.

Customer: (yells something incoherent) *hangs up*

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