Your Days At This Company Are Numbered

| St. Louis, MO, USA | Working | August 10, 2015

Me: “May I please have your employee ID?”

Caller: *sounding really confused* “Uh, um, wait, you need my employee ID?”

Me: “Yes, I need your employee ID in order to pull up your file.”

Caller: *pause* “I’m not understanding what you’re asking for here.”

Me: *pausing, trying to think of a clearer way of wording it and failing* “Can I get your employee ID?”

Caller: “Uh, um, I have my employee ID badge here, but how would I be able to show you that over the phone?”

Me: *literally smacking my forehead* “You can tell me what the actual numbers are for your employee ID?”

Caller: “OH! You need my employee ID number!”

Email Fail, Part 5

, | Puyallup, WA, USA | Working | August 8, 2015

(I have just booked a hotel for my brother but accidentally put in the incorrect email address. I now need to cancel the booking and call the website’s customer service department to help me with it.)

Me: “Hi,yes, I booked a hotel for my brother and it needs to be canceled, but the email I entered is incorrect. Can I please cancel the request with you?”

Customer Service Rep: “Sure. What was the email that you entered the confirmation under?”

Me: “That’s the thing. It was a typo error. I never got a confirmation email because I typed in the email incorrectly. It’s off by a letter. Is there any other way to look up the reservation?”

Customer Service Rep: “Sure, what’s the phone number?”

(I give them the phone number I reserved the room with.)

Customer Service Rep: “I’m sorry but I can’t find it under that phone number. Do you have the email address?”

Me: “Again, I don’t know what the email address is under as I typed it incorrectly. Can you look it up by name?”

Customer Service Rep: “Sure. We can try that. What’s the name?”

(I give my brother’s name.)

Customer Service Rep: “I’m still unable to find the reservation. Do you know the email address? I can find it using that.”

Me: *getting frustrated* “Again, I don’t know what the email address is under as I spelled it out wrong. The hotel is [Name] hotel in Portland. You don’t see anything under the hotel?”

Customer Service Rep: “Oh, here it is. And you said you want to cancel this reservation?”

Me: “Yes. The trip was canceled and we won’t be needing the hotel anymore. Can I please have a confirmation sent to a different email address?”

Customer Service Rep: “We can email the canceled reservation to the address we have on file.”

Me: “As I’ve said before… that email address is wrong. If you send the confirmation to that email address I will not receive it as that email does not exist!”

Customer Service Rep: “Okay. We should probably update that email address. What’s the new email address?”

(I give her the correct email address.)

Customer Service Rep: “Okay, I’ve updated the email address. Is there anything further I can help you with?”

Me: “So you have canceled the reservation and will email the new address?”

Customer Service Rep: “Yes. The reservation has been canceled and an email will be sent to—” *rattles off old email address*

Me: “Wait… No. I need the confirmation sent to the new email address I just gave you. ” *gives new email address*

Customer Service Rep: “Oh, okay. It’ll be sent to [new email address].”

Me: “Yes, to [new email address]. Can you send it now so I can confirm we get the cancellation confirmation?”

Customer Service Rep: “Sure.”

(We wait for confirmation. After about three minutes, we don’t get anything.)

Me: “We haven’t gotten a confirmation.”

Customer Service Rep: “Well, I show it was sent to [old email address]. Are you sure that’s correct?”

Me: “NO! That’s the OLD address! I need the confirmation sent to the NEW email address of [new email address]!”

Customer Service Rep: “Oh,okay. I’ve sent a new confirmation.”

(Now my brother calls out from the other room saying he got the confirmation.)

Me: “Thank you. We received the confirmation.”

Customer Service Rep: “Was there anything else I can help you with?”

Me: “Good god, no!” *hangs up*

(Overall, the call took about 45 minutes. Lesson learned… DOUBLE CHECK YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS!)


Ponying Up To Their Demands

| CA, USA | Working | August 7, 2015

(One of my coworkers and I get along well and often share when customers make crazy demands. However we have taken to doing this in a rather unusual way:)

Coworker: “Dang it.” *getting up to speak to a manager*

Me: “What? Do they want a pink pony?”

Coworker: “A pink pony that flies!”

Me: “Did you offer them a purple pony with a horn?”

Coworker: “Yes, but they only want a pink pony that flies. No horns.”

Me: “Ouch.”

(A short time later it’s my turn to get up.)

Coworker: “Pink pony?”

Me: “No, just a beige pony, but they want three of them. I just really don’t think they’ll get ’em.”

Putting The Dotted ‘I’s And Crossed ‘T’s Into IT

| Quebec City, QC, Canada | Right | August 6, 2015

(The client made a mistake in an application form and now has to send an email asking the service to cancel it.)

Me: “Okay, now you have to send an email to cancel the document. Here is the email address: d-i-s…”

Client: “How do I put the point on the ‘I’?”

Me: “I don’t understand.”

Client: “How do I put the point on the ‘I’? You know, the dot over the letter ‘I’?”

Me: “Huh?”

Client: “So?”

Me: “The computer automatically puts the dot over the letter, you don’t have to do anything.”

Client: “Wow, technology is so great today. Before, you had to manually put dots on I’s and cross your T’s too!”

Insecure About Your Security

| ON, Canada | Right | August 5, 2015

(I worked at a call center. I am in training but required to take one call whenever we are listening in with an experienced agent.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. My name is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I’d like to know why I am being charged so much! My bill is way higher than I was told!”

Me: “I can certainly look that up for you, sir. I need your phone number to access your account.”

Customer: “Why do I need to tell it to you? You should already have it!”

Me: “Sir, our system is not connected to our phones, so we need to get the information from you.”

Customer: “Fine! It’s [phone number].”

Me: “Thank you, sir. I need to ask you a few questions for security reasons. Can you tell me your name?”

Customer: “[First Name].”

Me: “Sir, can you please tell me your full name?”

Customer: “Why? What are you going to do with it?”

Me: “Sir, for security purposes I need your full name.”

Customer: “Well, don’t you have it?”

Me: “Yes, sir, I do, but I need you to tell me what it is so I can proceed with the security check and get to your issue.”

Customer: “Fine! It’s [Full Name].”

Me: “Thank you, sir. Now, can you please give me your address?”

Customer: “Why do you need that?”

Me: “Sir, as a security measure I need to ask for some information, like your name and address. Now, if you can tell me your address we can proceed on to your issue.”

Customer: “You have it right there in front of you! I’m not giving you my address so you can send me junk mail and have people watch me!”

Me: “Sir, I assure you we will not send you any junk mail or send anyone to watch you. I need your address for security measures.”

Customer: “Well, I’m not giving it to you! I already gave you my last name, now you can track me down and have people do something to my house! I won’t let you!” *click*

(I am just sitting there, stunned, looking at my coworker who I was assigned to.)

Coworker: “Sometimes we get people who don’t seem to understand why we need to make sure they are who they say they are…”

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