Unfiltered Story #102200

, | Unfiltered | December 27, 2017

(I work for an Internet provider, where customers can buy a “Special Service” so that we have to look at the case within 24 hours)
One day, 2 minutes before we close the Hotline on a Friday evening, I get a customer on the line, and I can see that he called earlier the same day.

Me: “Hello and welcome to [Internet Provider] Hotline, what can I do for you?”

Customer: “Hello, I would like to report a broken modem, and I want I changed now.”

Me: “Hello there. I can that you call earlier today and made the same request, and my colleague has tested the modem to be just fine, and book and technician for next Friday to you?”

Customer:”NO, that not good enough. I called last week when the same problem occurred and you fixed it, right on the spot. And now I demand you to do the same right now!”

Me: “Sir, As far as I can see, my colleague today did the exact same thing as last time, but since that didn’t work, we need to get a technician to look at it.
Customer:”You cannot fool me. Because I just called one of your coworkers in the customers service and brought the Special Service! So now you have to come and look at it before tomorrow!”
(At this point, he is practically yelling at me)

Me: “Sir please calm down, and stop yelling at me, I hear you just fine. I can’t do what you asked me to do, because that Service need to be brought at least 24 hours before, so it is not possible for me to make a new case on this, you have to wait for next Friday”

Customer:  “You [imagine a lot of Danish swearword] when I say you make a new case you f***** do it! Last week you people made it work right on the spot! Now you only do this to get more money out of me!”

(This continues for close to 10 minutes without him listing to me at all, and just shouting and yelling at me, with all kinds of random threats)

Customer: “I demand to talk to your manager!”

Me: “alright, I will pass the information down to him and he will call you sometimes tomorrow.

I spoke to my manager afterwards and he just laughed because we did everything right and it was all within the term of agreement. We had a wonderful laugh at the Call center afterwards because of it.

A Case For Upselling Humanity

, , , , | Working | December 19, 2017

(At some point it was decided that our tech support department should also always try to upsell. It is tempting; the usual pay is horrible and a bonus is offered, but it never sat right with me. I get a call from an elderly lady. She is lovely, living alone, and obviously not at all tech-savvy, and she has a simple enquiry: A friend told her that she was supposed to have hundreds of TV channels, but she only has about 30 — the very basic channels that, in Germany, are free to watch. After only a few questions from my side the issue becomes clear; someone sold her the most expensive cable bundle in connection with a set-top box that should be connected to her TV, only she has never, ever used it. She’s just been using her TV, hooked up to digital cable, and watched the free channels. All our calls are recorded, but this lady is awesome, and I’ve had about enough, so…)

Me: “Ma’am, before we continue, let me ask you one question: Are you happy with the service as it has been so far? Would you like to watch more channels?”

Caller: “Oh, I only ever watch the news for a bit in the evening. I don’t need anything else. I was just wondering about what my friend said.”

Me: “All right. You see, in order to get more channels, you would have to use the black box, and the remote that came with it. That’s one option. The other option is that I cancel your subscription for all but the basic functions.”

Caller: “I don’t want to deal with that box. It’s useless. But I want to keep the channels I used.”

Me: “Thank you, ma’am. Here is what we’ll do: Everything on your end stays the same, but instead of your monthly fee of [about 60] Euros, we’ll lower it to [about 20] Euros.”

Caller: “You can really do that?”

Me: “In this case, yes. Also, as I’m looking at your account right now, may I ask if you have a computer or use the Internet at all?”

Caller: “No, no. I can’t be bothered with that.”

Me: “And you’re not planning on buying a computer, either, I take it.”

Caller: “No, I can’t make sense of all that stuff.”

Me: “That’s fine. In that case, I will cancel your Internet subscription as well. That brings your new monthly total down to [less than 10] Euros.”

(The call took over 20 minutes as I walked her through the cancellation process and had her write down everything we’d discussed, since she wanted her son to check her contract, and I wanted them to be able to make an informed decision. I got written up for it, but I didn’t mind. You just don’t take advantage of lovely old ladies for a measly bonus. I just wish I had found out which colleague had sold an Internet contract to someone who didn’t own a PC, laptop, or smartphone, etc.)

Has You Under Their Spelling

, , , , , | Right | December 11, 2017

(I work in a small call center that provides information to tourists. It is a very quiet day when my coworker gets this call. I only hear her end of it.)

Coworker: “Yes, I would recommend [Restaurant]… The name is H-A-N-K… No, N-K. K as in– No, H-A-N-K-apostrophe-S.”


Coworker: “I would also recommend Cotton. C-O-T-T-O-N. No, C-O-T-T-O-N. N as in Nancy. Yes, C-O-T– No, T as in Thomas. No, T-O-N as in Nancy. Yes. Yes, is there anything else I can do for you?”


Coworker: “I would suggest that you take advantage of our free shuttle system. Yes, free. F-R-E-E. Yes. Yes, it is free. Yes.”

(This goes on for several more minutes, with the visitor repeatedly asking her to spell the names of places multiple times. Finally, the call ends.)

Coworker: “She sounded like she was high! H-I-G-H!”

It’s Going To Be One Of Those Days… We Think

, , , , , , | Working | December 8, 2017

(As a call center, we work seven days a week. As a result, most people’s weekends aren’t Saturday and Sunday. Today, Tuesday, one of my coworkers says to another:)

Coworker #1: “Tomorrow is your Friday, isn’t it?”

Coworker #2: “No, it’s my Thursday.”

Coworker #1: “Oh, that’s right; it’s Wednesday!”

Totally Three From The Truth

, , | Working | December 6, 2017

(I’m answering a survey about supermarkets.)

Caller: “From 1 to 5, how good is [Supermarket]?

Me: “I don’t know; I’ve never been to one of those.”

Caller: “…sorry, I can’t leave a blank answer.”

Me: “Are you serious? How am I supposed to give you useful information?”

Caller: “You can guess…?”

Me: “Okay, three. That way it’ll affect your results the least.”

Caller: “That’s smart.”

(He keep asking questions and there are A LOT I cannot answer, as not every one of the supermarkets are in my city. I keep answering “I don’t know, so three”.)

Caller: “Well, thank you very much for contributing to this survey.”

Me: “You do know that the results will be full of lies, right?”

Caller: *nervous laughter*

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