Refunder Blunder, Part 18

| USA | Crazy Requests, Money

Customer: “I see these earmuffs in your catalog and I really would like to have them, but I don’t have enough money on my credit card to get them right now because I was buying gifts. Soooo, I want to cancel an order I placed yesterday so that won’t charge on my card, and that will free it up some.”

Me: “I apologize. Your order placed yesterday has already been processed and you will receive it within 6-8 business days. I cannot cancel the order at this time.”

Customer: “Can’t you just take a pair of the earmuffs out of your warehouse and hold them aside for me until I have enough credit on my card?”

Me: “I’m very sorry, ma’am, we cannot hold merchandise aside in anticipation of someone ordering it.”

Customer: “Well, do this… I am returning $400 worth of stuff to you today. Once I get the tracking number, I’ll call you so you can go ahead and process the return and credit my credit card, so I can order these earmuffs before they sell out.”

Me: *trying to keep it together* “My apologies again, ma’am. We cannot process your return until it actually arrives to our facility…”

Customer: “Can I speak to a supervisor? It’s not you; it’s just that sometimes they can do things you can’t…”

Related:
Refunder Blunder, Part 17
Refunder Blunder, Part 16
Refunder Blunder, Part 15

Stick A PIN In My Heart

| CO, USA | Love/Romance, Popular, Technology

(The customer is an elderly gentleman.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. My name is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “Hi, yes, I am trying to access my voicemail, but I don’t remember my PIN.”

Me: “Oh, that’s all right. Let’s get your account pulled up and we will see if we can update your PIN.”

(We get the account pulled up and I change his PIN for him. I always make sure things are working before I let my customers go.)

Me: “All right, if you would like to go ahead and call your voicemail and make sure the PIN works?”

(The customer does so and the line goes quiet for a few moments. When the customer finally speaks up, he is much quieter than before.)

Customer: “Thank you so much. My wife left me a voicemail to pick up some groceries a few months ago. She passed away last month. I just wanted to hear her voice one more time.”

Me: *sadly speechless*

License To Be A Girl

| OH, USA | Bizarre, Popular, Transportation

Caller: “I need to file a claim. The tow truck driver removed equipment from my car.”

Me: “What equipment was taken off?”

(Anything bolted or wired into the vehicle is considered part of the vehicle, all other items will be removed for storage in case the vehicle goes to the auction.)

Caller: “My license plate.”

Me: “…”

Caller: “Hello?”

Me: “…Did you say your license plate?”

(These are legally considered personal property and we HAVE to remove them for storage.)

Caller: “Yes. Now I have to take it to a mechanic to have them put it back on.”

Me: “Ma’am, it’s two screws that are probably still on the vehicle. All you need is a screw driver or a quarter to stick in the grooves on the screw head.”

Caller: “BUT I’M A GIRL! I don’t know how to use any of those tool things!”

Me: *looks down… yep… still a girl… wonders if my voice is particularly manly today* “Ma’am, I will call the company that towed your car. The guy there owes me a favor. Just turn around and politely ask them to replace the plate. If you’re nice to them, they’ll be nice to you.”

Caller: “For free?”

Me: “I’ll arrange for them to waive the fees.”

(This happened to be my monitored call for the month. My manager laughed her way through my review.)

Receiving Way Too Much

| Oklahoma City, OK, USA | Health & Body, Technology

(I walk a customer through performing a system test on the satellite receiver in his living room.)

Me: “Okay, sir, that one works fine. Can you test the one in your bedroom?”

Customer: “Yeah. Let me get back there.” *he then proceeds to ask about the weather in our area as I hear fluid trickling in the background*

Me: *I finish describing the weather, still hearing a trickle* “Are you ready to test your bedroom receiver now, sir?”

Customer: “Well, I’m in the bathroom now. Hang on.”

Has Zero Ability To Improve The Situation

| Australia | Extra Stupid, Technology

(I’m doing a survey, asking business managers to rate how happy they are with various insurance providers they are currently using.)

Me: “How would you rate [Insurance Company]?”

Respondent: “Zero, because the service has been terrible and the claims process was really bad. We have been really unhappy with them.”

Me: “And how often do you go to market for quotes from other insurance companies that are not currently covering you?”

Respondent: “Oh, we never have. We stick with what we know…”