Zombies Need Debt Too

| Illinois, USA | Money, Zombies

(I work in customer service for a chain store credit card. I get a call from a manager, calling on behalf of a customer.)

Manager: “Hi, one of our customers just applied for a store card and she’d like to use it today. Can you look that up for me?”

(After pulling up the application, I see that the name on the application doesn’t match the customer’s name. However, for security reasons, I’m not allowed to come right out and say that.)

Me: “I’m afraid that application was declined due to some of the information not matching. Usually this means a typo somewhere. Could you have your customer try again, please?”

Manager: “Okay, she just tried it again. Did it go through this time?”

Me: “No, it’s still saying that the information isn’t matching. Um, you keep saying ‘she’, but on the application, it says ‘Mr.’. Is she applying jointly with someone?”

Manager: “I’ll ask.” *pause* “Okay, she says everything she does is in her late husband’s name, so that’s the social security number she’s using.”

Me: “Thank you. I’m not sure how her temperament is, so we’re going to have to be delicate about this. Could you very tactfully let her know that [store name] does not issue credit to dead people?”

Manager: *laughs* “Will do. Thank you!”

How To Make An Employee’s Day

| New York, USA | Awesome Customers, Top

(I work at a call center. As I’m working, I overhear my coworker talking another call.)

Coworker: “Hi, my name is [name]. I’m calling from [organization]…”

(As usual, I tune her out since it’s just a script and focus on my own call. However, after a few minutes, she hangs up and excitedly speaks to everyone in the room.)

Coworker: “Guys! She used my name!”

Manager: “What?”

Coworker: “She used my name! When she hung up, she said, ‘Have a nice day, [name]’!”

(To this day, whenever the room’s getting a little down, someone always tells the story of the customer who used her name!)

Great State Of Confusion, Part 5

| Missouri, USA | Geography

Customer: “I need to know where you’re located. We want to visit the one in Quebec.”

Me: “Okay, we actually don’t have any locations in Quebec. We do have Toronto which is in Ontario, and we have Calgary which is in Alberta.”

Customer: “Um, I think it’s Tor—…no. I think it’s Calgary. That’s right.” *talks to someone in the background* “Wait, I guess it’s the one here in Denver!”

Related:
The Great State Of Confusion, Part 4
The Great State Of Confusion, Part 3
Make Benefit Glorious Guestlogisticstan
The Great State Of Confusion, Part 2
The Great State Of Confusion
The Great State Of Ignorance