| British Columbia, Canada | Geography, Technology, Tourists/Travel

Me: “Alright in order for me to see your screen, you have to select your region.”

Caller: “What does that mean?”

Me: “You need to select the United States on the map.”

Caller: “Why would you think I would know where that was on a map?!”

Me: “It’s just a standard world map.”

(The caller reads places’ names aloud as they hover their mouse over the map.)

Caller: “Asia…Africa…Russia…China…I don’t think it’s here.”

The Gift Of Unreason

| Washington, USA | Crazy Requests, Money, Uncategorized

Me: “Thank you for calling, how may I assist you?”

Caller: “I would like a gift card.”

Me: “You would like to purchase a gift card?”

Caller: “No.”

Me: “I’m sorry, I don’t understand. You said you wanted a gift card.”

Caller: “Well, yes. We’ve been shopping at your stores for so many years, we feel we should get a gift card from you.”

Putting The Mental In Sentimental

| West Sussex, UK | Bizarre, Uncategorized

Me: “Hello and thank you for you calling.”

Caller: “I’m looking for a hoodie.”

Me: “Okay, what one would you like?”

Caller: “A dark one, with a hood.”

Me: ” Have you looked at our website?”

Caller: “No. You can pick one for me, and everytime I wear it I’ll think of you…”

Bulk Mail To The Future

| Scottsdale, AZ, USA | Math & Science, Technology, Uncategorized

Caller: “Hi, I called earlier and spoke with someone about getting a quote? She was supposed to email it to me, but I haven’t seen it yet.”

Me: “Not a problem, ma’am. How long ago was she supposed to have sent it?”

Caller: “Maybe ten minutes ago?”

Me: “Let me check with her. Did you check the spam folder, just in case?”

Caller: “I’ve never opened that folder. I really don’t think it would be there anyway.”

Me: “Well, sometimes business emails will automatically go to a spam folder based on their settings. You might want to check anyway.”

Caller: “That’s ridiculous! It wouldn’t be there. Those emails are from the future!”

It’s Spelled I-d-i-o-t

| Indianapolis, IN, USA | Extra Stupid, Language & Words, Uncategorized

(A customer has asked me to spell the name of the city, Indianapolis.)

Me: “I-n-d..”

Customer: “I-m-b…”

Me: “No, I’m sorry, that was I-n-d…”

Customer: “I-n-b…”

Me: “That’s d, like dog.”

Customer: “Oh. Okay.”

Me: “Okay… you got that?”

Customer: “I got it.”

Me: “…i-a-n…”

Customer: “…i-a-m…”

Me: “That was an n, like Nancy.”

Customer: “I have I-m-b-i-n-d-o-k-i-a-m-n.”

Me: “Let’s start at the beginning.”

Customer: “Oh. Okay.”

Me: “I-n-d…”

Customer: “I-n-d?”

Me: “Yes. …i-a-n…”

Customer: “All right, now I have I-n-d-i-a-m-i-m-b-i-n-d-o-k-i-a-m-n – is that how you spell Minneapolis?”

Me: “No. It is not.”

Customer: “Must be all them funny Indian letters. Okay, I’ll send this to you. Goodbye.”

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